Thread: SEANBABY!

  1. #1
    ermghoti's Avatar
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    SEANBABY!

    Cracked has degenerated into near total uselessness, I visit once every couple of months instead of daily. But, Seanbaby is back, and brought his surrealistically accurate martial mockery with him. I mean, we all know all of these stories, but you don't listen to somebody telling The Aristocrats for the punchline.
    "Systema, which means, 'the system'..."

    Quote Originally Posted by strikistanian View Post
    DROP SEIONAGI ************! Except I don't know Judo, so it doesn't work, and he takes my back.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devil
    Why is it so goddamn hard to find a video of it? I've seen videos I'm pretty sure are alien spacecraft. But still no good Krav.
    Quote Originally Posted by Plasma
    At the point, I must act! You see my rashguard saids "Jiu Jitsu vs The World" and "The World" was standing in front me teaching Anti-Grappling in a school I help run.
    Quote Originally Posted by SoulMechanic
    Thank you, not dying really rewarding in more ways than I can express.

  2. #2
    battlefields's Avatar
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    Cracked is a whiny piece of **** that has been infected by SJW nonsense and is only just surviving, most likely due to having Seanbaby injections once every so often.
    GET A RED BELT OR DIE TRYIN'.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devil View Post
    I think Battlefields and I had a spirited discussion once about who was the biggest narcissist. We both wanted the title but at the end of the day I had to concede defeat. Can't win 'em all.
    Quote Originally Posted by BackFistMonkey View Post
    I <3 Battlefields...

  3. #3
    battlefields's Avatar
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    Also, Bullshido is linked in this paragraph:

    This is ridiculous, but remember, the man is 100 percent sincere and seems to think he's tricking us. He has spent decades filing lawsuits and arguing online to protect his reputation as a deadly ninja -- a reputation he hasn't had since the last of his readers turned 13. I think the issue is that his fighting style is ancient and shadowy and he has no training for his opponents in the information age. Despite the suspiciously insane maze of obstacles that is his $10,000 fight challenge, several years ago, some debunkers fulfilled all the requirements and demanded a match. Ashida still refused to fight, but that doesn't mean he wasn't destroyed.
    And this one:
    Dozens of citizen journalists started digging up dirt on him. They found out he was a man named Christopher Hunter, or at least he was after he changed it from Radford Davis. According to court filings from 2007, he only owned half a truck and was making about $300 a month, which presumably includes the profits from his various ninja-related ventures and self-insert erotic literature. His book sales are unlikely to pick up now that EPA regulations keep lead paint away from babies, but maybe he's still holding out hope for that sweet five-figure payday when a bizarrely trusting rival ninja mails him the fight challenge money.
    GET A RED BELT OR DIE TRYIN'.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devil View Post
    I think Battlefields and I had a spirited discussion once about who was the biggest narcissist. We both wanted the title but at the end of the day I had to concede defeat. Can't win 'em all.
    Quote Originally Posted by BackFistMonkey View Post
    I <3 Battlefields...

  4. #4
    Sovvolf's Avatar
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    Used to read cracked articles religiously. Until the past couple years where there stuff became more blatantly click baity and it felt like they'd ran out of good material. Though glad to see Seanbaby back.
    "BJJ!!! Guard can't protect you from collapsing gym roof, tough guy!" - W. Rabbit

  5. #5
    battlefields's Avatar
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    I've got an idea formulating, but need to know if someone has ever bought that book of Ashida Kim's sexual adventures? If so, please let me know.
    GET A RED BELT OR DIE TRYIN'.
    Quote Originally Posted by Devil View Post
    I think Battlefields and I had a spirited discussion once about who was the biggest narcissist. We both wanted the title but at the end of the day I had to concede defeat. Can't win 'em all.
    Quote Originally Posted by BackFistMonkey View Post
    I <3 Battlefields...

  6. #6
    Sovvolf's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by battlefields View Post
    I've got an idea formulating, but need to know if someone has ever bought that book of Ashida Kim's sexual adventures? If so, please let me know.
    Aren't all his books sexual adventures?
    "BJJ!!! Guard can't protect you from collapsing gym roof, tough guy!" - W. Rabbit

  7. #7

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    I frequently masturbate to it-

    I mean, no I don’t have a copy!

  8. #8
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    I don't know why but this thread makes me really wish there was a Bullshido choice your own adventure book
    Of the single rapier fight between valiant men, having both skill, he that is the best wrestler, or if neither of them can wrestle, the strongest man most commonly kills the other, or leaves him at his mercy.
    –George Silver, Paradoxes of Defence

  9. #9
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    Quote Originally Posted by battlefields View Post
    I've got an idea formulating, but need to know if someone has ever bought that book of Ashida Kim's sexual adventures? If so, please let me know.
    I will, soon.

    I have to set up a PO box first, though, because I don't want Ashida Kim to know my address.
    Dan Severn loves raping people.

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