1. #8011

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    May 2015
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Had work, deadlifted a lot today and then ran 10km home, tidied the house, having dinner before I pack for my trip to glasgow this weekend.

  2. #8012
    SneakyGoblin's Avatar
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    Jun 2017
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Evergrey View Post
    hidradenitis suppurativa. Don't bother looking it up, even mayo clinic gets it wrong. If you want nightmares, feel free to google image search it though. You will see a lot of genitals. It is a genetic disease, not contagious except by birth.
    Seriously, most medical institutions, even, don't know what it is and have old information.
    Stanford and some place in the Netherlands are some of the only places researching it. We're 9 years out from fully understanding the mechanism of the disease. There are two doctors who see me at the same time about it, because I am a case study for them, heh.

    lemme go ahead and spare you pages of deeply wounded groins and show you an example in someone's armpit.

    My genes suck.
    Holy mackerel.

    Eve, my respect for your degree of mental and physical toughness has skyrocketed.
    "I want to have goblins about me, for I am courageous. The courage which scares away ghosts, creates for itself goblins--it wants to laugh." -- Friedrich Nietzsche

    Quote Originally Posted by Raycetpfl View Post
    If you are getting scared and short of breathe remind/tell yourself ,"There's no where else in the whole world I choose to be tonight."

  3. #8013
    BKR's Avatar
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    Jun 2009
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Evergrey View Post
    Sorry I haven't been around. Have been in a bit of a dark place.

    Did dye my hair a bunch of crazy colors, heh! I figured that I would do it now, before I go back to wearing a white dogi.

    Also realized I had pretty much given up on some level. Was thinking of myself as a cripple again. Obviously, I can't let that **** stand.

    My autoimmune disease has been kicking my ass, and so have the meds they put me on to combat it. Am now armed with anti-nausea meds and crystalized ginger.

    I've decided I'm going back to the dojo in two weeks, barring any new major injuries. **** this bullshit. I just miss it too much.

    On the positive side, my longest term, steadiest client has given me a raise to match my current rates. Woot! It makes a big difference. It's still wrecking my body to do this work, but at least I get some scratch in my pocket for my troubles.

    My fiance also got a raise, and has been offered a promotion that will net him an additional $1 an hour (because security) "if he works out in the position, so not right away." So sketch. But he got a $2/hour raise last week, so that is good.

    So, I have this friend who invited me to a "cuddle party." She kept asking so I finally said yes. I was wondering if it was gonna be some kinda platonic "eyes wide shut" sort of thing, but actually it was ok. It was all different kinds of people, different ages, races, shapes, and all of 'em seemed really sweet. I discovered that I was too prickly to just straight up cuddle with total strangers. Nooooope! I mean if somebody paid me to, I would. One of the women there is actually a pro-cuddler. You see it in Japan, and now it's here in the bay area too- people pay someone to cuddle them. Nothing sexual, just cuddling.

    The crazy thing is that one of the people there did seem kind of familiar, and he turned out to be a friend from high school that I hadn't seen in like 22 years. Holy ****. I went to high school down in Santa Barbara, but he moved up here.

    This is the second time someone I knew from hundreds of miles away reconnected with me, as TramirezMMA actually turned out to kind of know each other from the late 90s in San Francisco, I **** you not on that either.

    So anyway, I cuddled with my high school friend. Because, I mean, I know him. I don't really have that statute of limitations thing on friendship. If I don't see or hear from someone for 5, 10, 20 years, and they reappear in my life, as long as they didn't **** me over before, we're still friends. That was pretty cool.

    Tried Somalian food for the first time. Holy **** that is some good stuff! Sambusas- like, thin pastry triangles filled with meat, peppers, onion, uber spicy. Grilled goat that was the best most tender goat I'd ever had.

    My health has gone to hell in a handbasket despite eating a low carb diet again (which is the only kind of diet that seems to help, including with my autoimmune disease) but ya know, sometimes when my white blood cells suddenly eat through to the outside of my flesh and there's a big spray of blood that leaves little dots up the wall and on the ciling, I'm a tiny bit proud. Like, cool, that's really Jackson Pollock, except way more metal, ya know?

    Anyway, the need to punch and kick and choke people is gettin' mighty high.

    Tea ceremony training is going very well, on the other hand. Sensei says he is impressed with how well I am doing. This is not something I am accustomed to hearing. Shihan, from my Kyokushin dojo, is more likely to tell me I am the worst fighter he has ever seen in his life (yeah he has said this, and I believe him) and Sensei Wah is encouraging but doesn't lie about my lack of skill, but I guess sado is something that comes more naturally to me. I find myself using a lot of the motions used in sado in other parts of my life. I wash dishes a lot more gracefully now, hah.
    Glad to hear from you!

    Good deal on the payraise for the Fiancee, for sure. Sounds like he got his employment problems worked out.

    I've had Ethiopian food, was great, but never Somalian. Goat is good meat, I used to raise them for milk and meat. Plus, you know, goaties are so damned cute and friendly.
    Falling for Judo since 1980

    "You are wrong. Why? Because you move like a pregnant yak and talk like a spazzing 'I train UFC' noob." -DCS

    "The best part of getting you worked up is your backpack full of irony and lies." -It Is Fake

    "Banning BKR is like kicking a Quokka. It's foolishness of the first order." - Raycetpfl

  4. #8014
    BKR's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Went to BJJ last night. Wednesday is "BKR" day, training for me, not coaching. One of my students came to train as well. She got a good workout.
    We were working on knee-on-belly (being on top). Monday, which I missed due to coaching Judo, was defense to KOB. I've had a class or two on that, and I find it quite difficult. Mostly, don't get caught in KOB, LOL, is my take on it.

    I am going to Inter-provincial training this weekend in Invermere, BC. 50 coaches, and about 220 athletes, mostly u18 and younger, will be there to train.

    We have 5 students going, 3 of whom have never participated in such a large training event.

    Will be held in the new Columbia Valley Centre, which, funnily enough, our former Judo club president (he resigned a few weeks ago) did vast majority of major construction on.

    The Invermere Judo Club has been around for a long time, and will be moving their practices to the Centre, a huge upgrade in facilities for them.

    Should be fun !

    the new Columbia Valley Center.
    Falling for Judo since 1980

    "You are wrong. Why? Because you move like a pregnant yak and talk like a spazzing 'I train UFC' noob." -DCS

    "The best part of getting you worked up is your backpack full of irony and lies." -It Is Fake

    "Banning BKR is like kicking a Quokka. It's foolishness of the first order." - Raycetpfl

  5. #8015
    Evergrey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by SneakyGoblin View Post
    Holy mackerel.

    Eve, my respect for your degree of mental and physical toughness has skyrocketed.
    Thank you, though honestly I just don't really have a choice, ya know? Giving up gets old and boring fast. But I am honored.

    Quote Originally Posted by BKR View Post
    Glad to hear from you!

    Good deal on the payraise for the Fiancee, for sure. Sounds like he got his employment problems worked out.

    I've had Ethiopian food, was great, but never Somalian. Goat is good meat, I used to raise them for milk and meat. Plus, you know, goaties are so damned cute and friendly.
    Oh yeah, Ethiopian food is very different, to be honest, though injera was one of the options at this place! I have to wait another week before I can have it again, but I am absolutely going back. I think I found my place. Only got a tiny bit of "what's that white chick with purple and blue in her hair doing here" side-eye, and when people saw that I loved the food, they seemed to warm up quick.

    The tea is also free and amazing. Complex, rich, deeply spicy. Not hot spices, just spices. Clove, cinnamon, that sort of thing.

    In fact, I googled it and this recipe popped up-


    • 5 cups water.
    • 6 -7 lipton black tea bags.
    • fresh crushed ginger.
    • 2 -3 whole cloves.
    • 5 cardamom pods.
    • 1 cinnamon stick.
    • 12 teaspoon nutmeg.
    • sugar and milk.


    Soooo like mulled cider but in tea form. Doesn't taste the same as chai, either. The version I had did not contain milk, however.

    Today I got up ass-early, grumbling and tired. At midnight, when I planned to go to bed, someone popped up with "hey I have this friend who needs a pet sitter STARTING TOMORROW can you do it?" Always baffled by the lack of planning ahead, but in this case their regular sitter had a sudden personal emergency, which is understandable. So I spent almost an hour going back and forth, only to get a message this morning that they found someone to do it for free.

    This is common.

    I posted on FB about how midnight was the client hour, because people always either contact me about work when I am at work, driving, or it's midnight. Not long after, my longest-standing regular client popped up on facebook to ask if I could come clean Friday, and give directions. I think she saw my post, hah. It wasn't really a recommendation, but hey, work. And she can message me at midnight because she's my most reliable client. She's also the one who recently gave me a raise. It's time for the high holy days in Judaism, and she is having a big shindig dinner thing on Saturday, so she wants me to get the place in tip-top shape. Good thing I hauled all those heavy-ass boxes of paperwork out of the dining room for her last week! It'll just be cleaning and detailing this time, which is much less back-breaking.

    Anyway, this morning after ehhhh 5-6 hours of sleep, I hauled my ass out of bed and drove to Bay Point, which is only kind of considered to be a part of the bay area, by virtue of the fact that BART, our local subway, stops there. Picked up my buddy with the smashed up foot and took him to Walnut Creek for a doctor's appointment. Dropped him off, drove to Berkeley for my own shrink appointment.

    Still not sure talking to my shrink accomplishes anything.

    Drove BACK to Walnut Creek, met with my buddy at Target, which he gimped over to on his crutches while I was getting my head shrunk. Looks like the world of fashion is remembering that htere are colors other than a 70s vomit of mustard, avocado, and vermillion. Finally. At least a bit. Yay! And velvet is back. Got a plum velvet dress, a red velvet top, and some hair conditioner for $50. I work my ass off and am still shocked that I can actually afford to do something like this once in a while. It's a big deal for me, and one of the few ways in which I actually am female-ish, heh. I'm a clotheshorse.

    After taking my buddy back to Bay Point, carrying his purchases up the stairs for him, and giving a hug goodbye, I went to Martinez for my tea ceremony class.

    Today was special because a friend of mine who is soon to be moving to India came to the tea house to experience sado before she leaves. She lived in Tokyo for a while back in 2001, and missed Japanese culture and ritual.

    I found that I was nervous. My hands were actually the tiniest bit shaky! Everything seemed to flow really well, actually, but the tiny errors I made were keenly felt by me, and noticed by Sensei, hah. Everything is incredibly precise in sado for a reason- it is 500 years of making serving tea as efficient and practical as possible, on top of being a Zen Buddhist ceremony. I put my natsume, which is the caddy the tea is stored in, shaped like a jujube, a little too close to the well water box, and it made some things hell for me for the rest of the ceremony. Sensei was amused by seeing me suffer. He told me after that I could have subtly corrected the mistake at certain points. I was so focused on getting everything right in the correct order that I didn't think to do it. I knew I was mostly on my own for this one. It was a test and he said that I actually passed it spectacularly for the most part.

    I was too violent at points, though. Even kept chambering my arm like I was gonna punch something. I blame not getting to train- I'm out of balance with no one to hit, hah. Last person I struck was Tramirezmma. I told my buddy this morning that I really REALLY missed punching and kicking someone and then choking the **** out of them while they screamed and tried to crawl away. He said, "yeah, imagine feeling like that and being on crutches." Oh yeah I remember, I had an ACL replacement.

    Ultimately, our guest was very happy! And that is the important thing. She was so happy that she bounced up and down, after.

    I was stubbornly trying to give a good experience and sat in seiza too damned long, so my ankle is screaming at me now, but still, I'm pleased.

    Now I plan to play computer games and keep cool for the rest of the night, sipping ginger tea.

  6. #8016
    hungryjoe's Avatar
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    Jan 2007
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    judo hiatus
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Glad you're back Eve.

  7. #8017
    Evergrey's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by hungryjoe View Post
    Glad you're back Eve.
    Awh, thanks Joe! <3

  8. #8018
    BKR's Avatar
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    Jun 2009
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Went t o judo. Ran class. Did randori. Cardio not so bad.

    Joints suck ball sweat.
    Falling for Judo since 1980

    "You are wrong. Why? Because you move like a pregnant yak and talk like a spazzing 'I train UFC' noob." -DCS

    "The best part of getting you worked up is your backpack full of irony and lies." -It Is Fake

    "Banning BKR is like kicking a Quokka. It's foolishness of the first order." - Raycetpfl

  9. #8019

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Realized this week my withdrawals are in full swing as my anxiety attacks return with full force, even though my mood is a lot better than it was pre-medication. Honestly don't think I'm fit for much today.

    Thankfully Im not home alone right now otherwise I'd probably be worse. I know it can take a few months to get off the withdrawals from Prozac, so I most likely need to give myself time and take little steps.

  10. #8020
    Kovacs's Avatar
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    Cross Fit, small arms.
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by kimjonghng View Post
    Realized this week my withdrawals are in full swing as my anxiety attacks return with full force, even though my mood is a lot better than it was pre-medication. Honestly don't think I'm fit for much today.

    Thankfully Im not home alone right now otherwise I'd probably be worse. I know it can take a few months to get off the withdrawals from Prozac, so I most likely need to give myself time and take little steps.
    What was it for, depression? I'm behind on this thread so apologies if youve gone through it earlier.
    Ne Obliviscaris

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