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NOOB father wants most effective self defense for His Son

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  • patfromlogan
    replied
    Sometimes I wish I could ask an OP what happened.

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  • It is Fake
    replied
    Don't worry about it. The thing is we can only go by his first post.

    He named three styles, he was bullied as a child, and he wants to know what is best for his child.

    Minus some bickering all of these points were addressed. Now, if he comes back, we narrow it down to his area. In some cases, IMO, no training is better than crappy training.
    Last edited by It is Fake; 5/23/2009 12:05pm, .

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  • Kishi
    replied
    Duly noted, sir.

    Yeah, though, I didn't understand why I was wrong at first until I started reading through other parts of the site and I thought, '... curses!' So... just wanted to make up for my mistake earlier.

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  • It is Fake
    replied
    Originally posted by Kishi View Post
    I don't understand. I know I spoke in error before. I'm honestly trying to offer something of value to the discussion at hand here. What exactly am I doing wrong here?
    I guess I find it funny that you made a mistake then, took words that were already stated as your own.

    I can be harsh like that you know, 11 posts later.

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  • hungryjoe
    replied
    Posting?

    ooops
    Last edited by hungryjoe; 5/23/2009 12:05pm, . Reason: Forgot this was in newbie town.

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  • Kishi
    replied
    I don't understand. I know I spoke in error before. I'm honestly trying to offer something of value to the discussion at hand here. What exactly am I doing wrong here?

    Leave a comment:


  • It is Fake
    replied
    Originally posted by Kishi View Post
    Gosh, I disappear for a little while to get rid of some of my n00bishness and look what happens...
    More noobness.

    Now:
    Honestly, it comes down to the OP's situation. We don't know where he lives, what dojo he has available, how alive they are. We don't know if the school he goes to even offers a wrestling program (even though it probably does). Sure, we can talk all about how good certain styles are in a general situation, but we can't speak for his situation.
    Then:
    If you're looking for a self-defense system, Krav Maga is probably the best fit. That's assuming that all you're looking for for your son is self-defense. Honestly, though, it's probably best to see if he's even interested in martial training.

    Do you need quotes for what you just typed?

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  • Kishi
    replied
    Gosh, I disappear for a little while to get rid of some of my n00bishness and look what happens...

    Honestly, it comes down to the OP's situation. We don't know where he lives, what dojo he has available, how alive they are. We don't know if the school he goes to even offers a wrestling program (even though it probably does). Sure, we can talk all about how good certain styles are in a general situation, but we can't speak for his situation.

    I'm only saying this because it's obvious that everyone wants to help this guy. Doesn't it make sense to help him in the way that would benefit him most?

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  • JudOWNED
    replied
    Originally posted by cuatro76 View Post
    If wrestling is offered at his school, sign him up. If not, Judo or BJJ. If your kid is having trouble with school bullies, he needs to be able to control the situation with grappling, not retaliate with punches and kicks.
    QFT (which I always thought was "quite fucking true")!

    The wrestling team will teach him a good MA (wrestling), build athleticism, engender both physical and mental toughness, and (as long as he gets along with his teammates) actually help make him popular. All of those things tailor made to avoid being bullied.

    Otherwise, any good sport based MA (Judo, BJJ, boxing, kickboxing, MMA, etc.) should do. For that matter, even getting your kid in a gym doing some hard core lifting to pack on some quality muscle and strength is pretty good for avoiding/dealing with bullies.
    Last edited by JudOWNED; 5/23/2009 8:48am, .

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  • Mr. Fong
    replied
    hmmmm, maybe the op is reading our replies and not botherd to reply,
    hay op!, if you want the most best information as possible its best to update us =)

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  • JP
    replied
    Also,

    A connecting lesson that can't hurt for any child is to understand the difference between acting tough, looking tough and being tough. The sooner he learns the difference the better off he'll be for all sorts of reasons. So, yes he learns to deal with the bully but he also learns how to deal with himself.

    And where the hell is the OP? This whole thread got touched off because of his question. How about an update, dude.

    Or is your kid suffocating in a locker somewhere with his drawers up around his ears?

    Leave a comment:


  • Mr. Fong
    replied
    I agree with Fug, Many people sterotypically dont find Asains to be strong,
    and Bullies try ( might try) to mess with him cause of that, its quite dumb =/, Its good to stand up for your self =). Just make sure you dont go to faror if they have a gun or knife e.t.c, those can be extremely difficult, but if it came to that, just give them the money they want. But if they just used thier fists then its a different story =). I know alot of People around my age who never start fights and they are into things like kickboxing and boxing e.t.c. Most of them realize what they could do and wouldnt even bother.

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  • Matt Phillips
    replied
    Massive props to Fug. Getting your kid to the point where he can respond like that is the goal IMO. Props to your boy too for displaying that kind of maturity.

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  • patfromlogan
    replied
    Originally posted by PimpDawg View Post
    These days, punching will get your kid assault charges and suspension, while chokes will get them attempted murder. You're both missing the obvious answer (no, not pins and hold downs).

    If you don't want to be picked on, you have look tough. That means Affliction t-shirts, Tapout hats, and UFC shorts. One of those thin douche-bag beards probably wouldn't hurt either. Isn't this another version of striking vs grappling? YMAS.
    Again, I think that this misses the point. My son was small and Asian looking, a natural target for bullies. He never tried to look tough. Bullies are low status insecure cowards at heart and "looking tough" is part of their foolish mind set. Looking self confident is good. Looking powerful is good. As one instructor told us, "I'm not here to be tough, I'm here to learn to be powerful."

    JP said it well,
    Originally posted by JP View Post
    I'd like to second, third and fourth Mtripp's suggestion of buying books on bully proofing. An ounce of self-assurance on the boy's part is going to be a hell of a lot more effective than just teaching him to kick ass. With the former, it's far less likely he'll ever have to do the latter.

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  • patfromlogan
    replied
    Originally posted by cyril View Post
    JiuJitsu is great, so is Judo. If you give us a location around where you live, I'm sure some bullies can suggest a decent training area around.
    While I encourage all parents to get their kids into our local BJJ dojo, I also have a small son who benefited greatly from karate. I'm not talking about bs strip mall garbage (see my review of Bobby Lawrence!), but several years in a karate school that emphasized throws and takedowns was of course good. He was able to throw down a bully (though as a teacher turned the corner he got a week in detention - which for a violin carrying straight A half Asian was a real status making sentence) and in another case, punch out a large drunk teenager who was abusing a passed out guy (stripping him and pouring paint on him etc). He's not a tough guy or even much of a fighter (IMHO, don't tell him), but he was quite capable of striking the big guy several times, very fast and effectively, according to what his friends told me.

    Much more important than the style is the personality and methods of the instructor. We happened to have a small man who is a great fighter (standup, clinch, and ground) and who taught "karate" for years. But more importantly he somehow taught my son that he could let his lack of stature determine his life with "little man complex," or he could become a confident martial artist and a confident person.

    Originally posted by cuatro76 View Post
    If wrestling is offered at his school, sign him up. If not, Judo or BJJ. If your kid is having trouble with school bullies, he needs to be able to control the situation with grappling, not retaliate with punches and kicks.
    My son, while in middle school was targeted by some bullies and told me he'd handle it with out parental intervention. He also told me that fighting was really stupid because it set up a situation where you'd have a "rep" be challenged by the ever ascending hierarchy of idiot wannabe gangsta morons. Which he didn't have any desire to be a part of. I asked him months later how'd it go and he said that he was being tripped and pushed by the group of dopes and he said to them, "It's too bad that you guys have such low self esteem that you have to try to build it up by bullying me." He said that at that point they all looked sad and walked away. It was that or beat him up, and while a group may have been able to do so, he'd had years of training with lots of sparring and self-defense, and could have done some damage.

    I think that his self confidence, gained from a good school (and of course his amazing dad [or was it mom? Or his sister, who at 13 or 14 kicked bbs in the face during kumite? -she looked slow but it was really graceful move that fooled 'em]), was the important thing. He'd fought a lot, and been tested by rather grueling sparring rounds in testing, and that, more than actual fighting, was the important factor.

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