Most retarded arguments you've ever seen/heard?

[MrGalt]

Since all Bujinkan Taijutsu was invented in what, the late 60s, early 70s, it should be more relevant due to its modernity, right?

I have a crazy question Iron Man: You mentioned that kata teaches you timing. Really? Timing? By yourself? Punching the air? Could you define timing for us really quick? Is this "timing" like not punching the back of your left hand when you follow with the right when throwing a jab, cross combination?

[Rask]

Most of the arguments which people have put against me in regards to MMA revolve around the usualy crap - rules, sport fighting vs street, etc... easy stuff to counter, especially when they then advocate TKD or karate which don't even permit throws or grappling.

A few people have argued to me in favour of TMA over MMA because many TMA dojos teach defence against weapons and multiple opponents, which MMA gyms almost never, ever teach. While obviously it is dangerous and unadvisable in any case to fight a knife-wielding opponent or a group of attackers, if someone had no choice, they might have to try. Why then do absolutely no MMA gyms teach defence against weapons, or even strategies for fighting multiple opponents? I understand that armed opponents and multiple opponents are both really bad situations, but still... at least some basic training would be better than none if there was no choice but to fight. Why then are these areas neglected by all MMA gyms (other than those which teach FMA of course, in the case of weapons)?

[Vieux Normand]

"Prove that kata have no combat application."

Being asked to "prove" negatives, are we?

Flying-Spaghetti-Monster-Akbar!

Watering plants contributes to my combat-effectiveness.

Really. No, really.

Go ahead...prove that it doesn't.

[MrGalt]

Why then do absolutely no MMA gyms teach defence against weapons, or even strategies for fighting multiple opponents? I understand that armed opponents and multiple opponents are both really bad situations, but still... at least some basic training would be better than none if there was no choice but to fight.

Down that road lies the LARP, my friend. That's why they don't waste time fantasizing about weapons and multiple opponents.

What valuable training do you think the TMAs give you against multiple opponents, given that most of them are so dismal at fighting even one? I remember my days in the Ke?po Circle of Death, and I'd have been a much better fighter if I had spent that time running laps around the dojo.

[PRC4Eva]

Most of the arguments which people have put against me in regards to MMA revolve around the usualy crap - rules, sport fighting vs street, etc... easy stuff to counter, especially when they then advocate TKD or karate which don't even permit throws or grappling.

A few people have argued to me in favour of TMA over MMA because many TMA dojos teach defence against weapons and multiple opponents, which MMA gyms almost never, ever teach. While obviously it is dangerous and unadvisable in any case to fight a knife-wielding opponent or a group of attackers, if someone had no choice, they might have to try. Why then do absolutely no MMA gyms teach defence against weapons, or even strategies for fighting multiple opponents? I understand that armed opponents and multiple opponents are both really bad situations, but still... at least some basic training would be better than none if there was no choice but to fight. Why then are these areas neglected by all MMA gyms (other than those which teach FMA of course, in the case of weapons)?

Multiple opponents: If you can't take one guy, how're you going to expect to take on multiple?
Weapons: Going empty-handed against someone is a weapon is asking to get killed. Not to mention TMA places generally don't train weapons alively, but I could be wrong (how's kendo or fencing?).

[NJM]

Unless you carry a rapier at all times and are only attacked by people who follow 14th century dueling rules, Fencing is probably not the best weapon defense option.

[PRC4Eva]

Unless you carry a rapier at all times and are only attacked by people who follow 14th century dueling rules, Fencing is probably not the best weapon defense option.

True.
But in the event you for whatever reason are in a swordfight, would it actually help?

[marcusdbrutus]

I think this needs trollshido.

[Hesperus]

True.
But in the event you for whatever reason are in a swordfight, would it actually help?

[Hooded Justice]

True.
But in the event you for whatever reason are in a swordfight, would it actually help?

Can you actually feel the wind as it blows through the tunnel you have between your ears or do you just hear a little bit of a whistle?

[aaaargh]

What if you get in an argument at an anime convention, and 3 bad guys in ninja costumes wait for you with katana and get you backed into a dark alley, wide enough that they can come at you from all sides but narrow enough that you can't slip past them, and anyway it's raining and you're wearing bad shoes so it would be hard to run away, and it's too far from a public area to call for help and all your friends are someplace else, and you left your cellphone and your firearm in the car, but thank goodness the bad guys don't have guns either; but you're carrying an epee because your girlfriend is into fencing and you just bought it as a gift for her. Would fencing be the best art then? Or since they're using katana, would kendo work better?

As a follow-up, what if they were using shinai, and your epee had a blunted tip for competition?

[Hooded Justice]

What if you get in an argument at an anime convention, and 3 bad guys in ninja costumes wait for you with katana and get you backed into a dark alley, wide enough that they can come at you from all sides but narrow enough that you can't slip past them, and anyway it's raining and you're wearing bad shoes so it would be hard to run away, and it's too far from a public area to call for help and all your friends are someplace else, and you left your cellphone and your firearm in the car, but thank goodness the bad guys don't have guns either; but you're carrying an epee because your girlfriend is into fencing and you just bought it as a gift for her. Would fencing be the best art then? Or since they're using katana, would kendo work better?

As a follow-up, what if they were using shinai, and your epee had a blunted tip for competition?

In this instance I believe that the best strategy would be to point behind them, get all wide eyed and yell "HOLY SHIT TITS!" and run like a muther fucker when they inevitably turn around.

[Holy Moment]

I like this one the best out of everything I've ever seen before: Why kung-fu is better than karate:

If you delve far enough into it you'll get into internal arts, chi use, modifying your body through thought. My sifu could withdraw his testicles into his body without touching them...thus making it impossible to disable him with a kick to the groin.

http://askville.amazon.com/Karate-Ku...uestId=1301826

[ysc87]

I've heard a drunk uber-nationalist Korean acquaintance try to make the case that Kung Fu originated from Taekkyeon/Subak, and that Jujitsu originated from Yusul.

He was not happy when I corrected him.

[Hertzyscowicz]

For some reason it only just occured to me that almost every style whose practicioners disparage MMA for having rules has mostly compliant drills and light contact point sparring, and otherwise more constraining sparring and competition rules.