Weirdest moments in training?

[Zouff]

Alright, akward judo moments!

I was a white belt, just learning the basics, and this was my first randori. It was against a black belt about my age (I started pretty late) and first thing he does is faceplant me in the mat with a botched arai goshi. When I stood up completely groggy, no excuses or anything, he just looked at me with a badass Chuck Norris face and says "You didn't break your fall right, that was your fault". I learned afterwards that the cute chick I was hitting on 5 minutes earlier was his sister.

A few months later I was learning tomoe nage with a small, very lightweight chick. First try, I had no idea how to lift her. She just tells me to go for it, so somehow I end up holding her above my head with my arms outstreched, and since I didn't know what to do next I just gently put her down. She just stared at me for 5 seconds, then walked away.

[Mackan]

I don't have too many of those ultra-wierd moments, but...

First time I got choked out, it was before my son's eyes. He was two and a half then and I got choked out listening to him cheer "Good work, Daddy! You have him now!" Which was ironic since I hadn't got anything on that guy. I was totally dominated for forty minutes.

The next training, I left Isac with his mom. My sparring partner, though, thought that it would be a wonderful idea to bring his girlfriend. This time, as he shoots for my legs, I took a step and he hits my knee with his face and is knocked out. His gf is chocked and he gets The Mother Of All Black Eyes...

He still, to this day, thinks it was revenge.

[Chili Pepper]

The next training, I left Isac with his mom. My sparring partner, though, thought that it would be a wonderful idea to bring his girlfriend. This time, as he shoots for my legs, I took a step and he hits my knee with his face and is knocked out. His gf is chocked and he gets The Mother Of All Black Eyes...

Some moments, of my students, rather than mine:

Frank showed up with his amazingly hot girlfriend, and told his partner "make me look good, okay?" which, in my school, predictably meant that he'd end up humiliated eventually. Sure enough, one of the guys reared back and gave him a slap across the face that you could've heard a mile away.

Another time, we're training out in the park, sitting on the grass to stretch. A dog comes running up, very happy to see everybody, runs around the circle introducing himself to everyone, and at the last person, lifts his leg and pees all over him.

Outdoor training was always good for a laugh. No matter how thoroughly we checked for dog poop beforehand, we had one particular student who always managed to be the guy who stepped in it, fell on it, or sat on it.

Drunks would always want to show us some esoteric move that they were sure would rock our world.

[tideliar]

Some moments, of my students, rather than mine:


Another time, we're training out in the park, sitting on the grass to stretch. A dog comes running up, very happy to see everybody, runs around the circle introducing himself to everyone, and at the last person, lifts his leg and pees all over him.

And the student thus earned the nickname "Lamppost" that day...

To Mr Fong: Yeah...was an arrogant/dumb move not to. It was a couple of years ago now though, so too late. To be honest I didn't think about it being broken, just dislocated, and figured I'd man-fixed it fine. Wasn't till the swelling went down and the knuckle of the toe stayed big that i thought, "you fucking moron...".

When I dislocated my finger training last summer I was at the MO within 24hrs for X-rays and a sexy little finger-splint (FAIL)

[Chili Pepper]

And the student thus earned the nickname "Lamppost" that day...

Damn! Wish we'd thought of that at the time. Actually, he was "Fuzzy Rob", to distinguish him from "Big Rob"

[Shiningwolf]

I was sparring with a friend, caught his leg kick, did that Sanda sweep him, then tried going into a kneebar and ended up smashing my balls on his knee >< (not cool!)

[Sri Hanuman]

I was sparring with a friend, caught his leg kick, did that Sanda sweep him, then tried going into a kneebar and ended up smashing my balls on his knee >< (not cool!)

Similar things happen to me regularly, and I still fail at wearing a cup.

[Krat0s]

happens to me as well, I get hit in the balls area quite frequently, I should get a cup soon so I dont have to worry about ball damage,

I hope I can haz kids, due to the balls damage, lol

[tideliar]

Dude, after getting kneed and the tip of me old man trapped against my thigh and getting a blood blister on the poor chap, I *will never* jam without a cup. however i have a wicked photo I show the laydees of the outline of my cup around half my groin after getting a bad strike to groin. If I hadn't been wearing the cup I'd have been in the ER getting my sack drained for sure. <- not what you might think I mean...

[wingchunx2z]

Back in WC class we were practicing this entry, knee up (shin block?), tan sau, come in on a 45 degree angle. After class we were doing some light sparring and I decided to try it, so I came in and my right knee came up as my opponent cross stomped my left knee. I felt this funky pop in my left knee and collapsed. No pain, but my leg was totally numb for a few seconds. Never did figure out what I did but it was just creepy.

Possibly because corss kicking someone in the knee is a valid technique and it sux for the person getting kicked?

[louiethebutcher]

Me and this guy ended up in the North South position and all of a sudden he started sucking my dick. That was weird.

Ummm.. that is def. kinda weird.

[Mackan]

If I hadn't been wearing the cup I'd have been in the ER getting my sack drained for sure. <- not what you might think I mean...

Not in a good way, you mean?

[EdgeWalker]

Outdoor training was always good for a laugh. No matter how thoroughly we checked for dog poop beforehand, we had one particular student who always managed to be the guy who stepped in it, fell on it, or sat on it.

Drunks would always want to show us some esoteric move that they were sure would rock our world.

we frequently train outdoors too, and dog shit is a serious issue!

one time, I was sparring with my team mate at a park (most Taekkyon competitions are team games). I did a push-kick to his thighs to keep him at bay, and saw that I had left a brown streak on his han-bok(gi) pants. We had to end that sparring session early.
Since we wear foam shoes for sparring and competition, I really had no idea when I picked up that dog shit, but I did feel sorry for him lol.


Taekkyon Battle, one of the biggest fighting events in Kyullyun Taekkyon takes place in Insa-dong every saturday afternoon. Insa-dong is a big tourist attraction in Seoul, so we get lots of spectators, including drunk senior citizens.

We actually had one barge into the ring last week. I should have been there everyone's telling me it was hilarious.

[tideliar]

Not in a good way, you mean?

As in balls looking like an overripe Aubergine (egg plant to our American readers) and the "pint of blood from the severe scrotal edema" kind of way


...nice!

[sochin101]

My friend and I were training and we just got the giggles over something. I think it was one of my less-than balletic breakfalls.
Anyway, we cracked up and the instructor, quite rightly, admonished us.
"Gentlemen, you're learning a martial art. Be martial".

I spent the next 45 minutes pretending to be Eminem.
Quietly.