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What is the most bullshido story you've ever told?

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    What is the most bullshido story you've ever told?

    i mean to exaggerate your abilities in your style of MA? and it could be for any reason: pissing contest at a bar; to get laid; to get a job; you were practicing your kicks and some asshole kids yelled "your balls are sticking out of your shorts!"

    seriously. bullshit the fuck outta me.

    #2
    i was in a hotel bar with my wife and some friends (we/they are all a bunch of pussies and look the part too). this sketchy dude comes up and approaches my wife. he was pretty big and i am not, but whatever, i cut him off and drunkenly started chatting him up. he had a big smirk on his face and was pretty much being condescending. i dont remember how it exactly came up, but i told him i was an amateur fighter, and that i used chinese boxing.

    in reality, i did wing chun and sucked at it too.

    well, after that comment, he sort of deflated a little and when i told him i had to get back with my wife and friends he backed off. and i had to dry the pee out of my pants.

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      #3
      I'm leaving work late at night minding my own business, when suddenly a dozen ninjas appear from the shadows. A few flying kicks, some pressure point strikes and a couple of atomic elbow drops usually does the trick.

      This actually happens to me all the time. Fuckers just can't take a hint.
      :new_all_c

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        #4
        Originally posted by Craphonso
        i was in a hotel bar with my wife and some friends (we/they are all a bunch of pussies and look the part too). this sketchy dude comes up and approaches my wife. he was pretty big and i am not, but whatever, i cut him off and drunkenly started chatting him up. he had a big smirk on his face and was pretty much being condescending. i dont remember how it exactly came up, but i told him i was an amateur fighter, and that i used chinese boxing.

        in reality, i did wing chun and sucked at it too.

        well, after that comment, he sort of deflated a little and when i told him i had to get back with my wife and friends he backed off. and i had to dry the pee out of my pants.
        I told some girl at a bar that TAIKWONDOE AND KAROTTY WRE TEH SUCK! AND WING CHUN WAS ULTIMATE!

        By the time I got to sticky hands she was long gone.

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          #5
          when i was 13 and 14, i did stats for wrestling at my high school. the guys always fucked around, telling people that i was really on the team, but i was injured and had to do stats. this hawt guy actually called them on their bullshit... and i was like... "you wanna fucking go?"

          so we wrestled... and he clobbered the shit out of me.

          i really just wanted him to pin me down and grope me.

          he didn't even pinch my butt. *cries a little*

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            #6
            I used aikido to win a fight.

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              #7
              I told some morons at a bar that I could do Dillma's retarded no touch knock out, and to prove it I would do it on a random guy for 20$.... so I went up to my friend ( they didnt know that at the time )... and told him that if he didn't buy me a beer I would knock him out. He laughed of course and swung at me. I backed off in a ninja cat like stance.... so retarded anyone with any knowledge of anything could see it was fake... anyway I threw what looked like a street fighter fireball motion at him and he flew back (willingly of course... dillman is a piss bucket and his shit doesn't work, so leave it at that). The guy saw and had to give me my 20$..... we left and I gave my buddy 10$. He bought a dime bag and I got a few drinks for free LOL.

              I guess the guys heard later that we were friends and that we staged it.... but we never saw them again.

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                #8
                I have never told a lie.

                Well one time, in the first grade, I told my friends I beat up two fourth-graders. In reality, I beat up one and only punked the other.


                Now lovely Lucifer, in hell so stark
                King, and lord of sin and pride
                With some mist his wits make dark.
                He send thee grace to be thy guide


                HE LOOKS LIKE A TINY BEAR MIXED WITH A CAT, AND THAT IS THE MEANEST ANIMAL MIXTURE EVER, BEAR FOR FUCKING STRENGTH, AND CAT FOR FUCKING MEAN!!! MOTHERFUCKER.

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                  #9
                  Originally posted by SpringHeeledJack
                  I have never told a lie.

                  Well one time, in the first grade, I told my friends I beat up two fourth-graders. In reality, I beat up one and only punked the other.
                  oh boy... i remember first grade. i told alot of people that my dad could beat up their dad. in reality... when i was first grade... my dad and i were the same height and wore the same size dress.

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                    #10
                    The Sirc Debacle

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                      #11
                      Originally posted by Cracky McSlugHoot
                      The Sirc Debacle
                      whatever happened in that? bullshit me, please?

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                        #12
                        I have a couple of large scars on my chest form an operation when I was a kid. A couple of times I've told people they were from some nutter who attacked me with a knife before I beat the shit out of him.

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                          #13
                          Originally posted by fes_fsa
                          whatever happened in that? bullshit me, please?
                          http://www.bullshido.net/forums/show...highlight=sirc


                          Now lovely Lucifer, in hell so stark
                          King, and lord of sin and pride
                          With some mist his wits make dark.
                          He send thee grace to be thy guide


                          HE LOOKS LIKE A TINY BEAR MIXED WITH A CAT, AND THAT IS THE MEANEST ANIMAL MIXTURE EVER, BEAR FOR FUCKING STRENGTH, AND CAT FOR FUCKING MEAN!!! MOTHERFUCKER.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            In middle school I did karate and a rumor started going around that I was a black belt. It wasnt true and I didnt start it, but that doesnt mean I put an end to it either :)

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Originally posted by SpringHeeledJack
                              that's an actual thread. i want bullshit. with unicorns, puppies, and glitter.

                              Comment

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