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A ninjer is trying to steal my woman

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    A ninjer is trying to steal my woman

    So, I have been dating this girl for a few weeks now, and it appears I have some competition. She forwarded me a message she recieved from another myspacer, who was attempting to woo her. After obtaining her permission to do this (since it was her message, after all), this was his attempt at seduction:

    Originally posted by Casanova
    hey, i was just checking out your profile and i thought you were pretty hot. anyways, i'm just gonna be straightforward and blunt because I believe that honesty is the best policy. we're both adults here so i'm hoping you won't be offended by this. would you like to get together sometime and get freak nasty? and by freak nasty i think you know what i mean. if you're interested, hit me back.
    It was hard for her to resist, I'm sure, but she insists she was able to restrain herself from jumping at his offer to get himself laid. My curiosity was piqued, naturally, so I decided to check his myspace:

    The fun starts here
    (note: he has set his profile to private since last night, I was still able to view the whole thing with the link above this morning.)
    EDIT: He has admitted that this public profile is his, too. However, he says he lost the password for it. He obviously hasn't logged in there since 2006.

    I about fell out of my chair laughing. A ninjer from Kentucky was trying to proposition her! The only way the profile pic could be any funnier would be if he wore his mask "Naruto-style" with no hood and a mullet spilling over his shoulders.

    After regaining my composure, I read a bit more. He has some pretty impressive claims:

    Originally posted by Ninjer
    After several years of Martial Arts Training abroad, I have returned to my roots in the United States. With my cat-like reflexes and extensive NINJA skills, I am pretty much ready for anything that life throws at me. I am trained in many fighting disciplines, such as Jeet Kune Do, Kung Fu, Judo, and Muay Thai. In the short of it, don't fuck with me!
    I love it how he capitalized "ninja," like it's an acronym for "Now I'm Nuzzling Japan's Ass" or something. I mean, Christ, the guy is 28, you'd think he would've gotten past this phase by now. Also, I feel I'm probably free to assume "abroad" means "in my mom's basement."

    So, I did the natural thing, and decided I was going to try to fuck with his head a bit. I sent him a friend request, and a nice little email to try to sucker him in:

    Originally posted by me
    Hey, saw your profile, it seems you're into martial arts, as am I. Do you train anywhere, currently? How far is Nortonville from Evansville? It's been a few years since I've had a place to practice, so I figured I'd ask. Later!
    I *so* hope he replies.

    Anyway, while I wait for him to get back to me, my question is this: should I try to lure him towards the boards so the bullies can have a go at him, or keep my little fun to myself? I like amusing myself at these guys' expenses, but I know some folks on here find it annoying.

    (edited to fix link and a spelling error.)
    Last edited by kobudo; 6/05/2007 5:46am, .

    #2
    As a ninja, would you do me the honour of giving me your girlfriends myspace addy...we must first confirm if she is hot.

    Don't worry I won't try to steal her...Though hopefully screwing her did cross my mind...
    (just kidding)
    :icon_blac

    Well not about her myspace addy...c'mon...give it up...

    Comment


      #3
      I promised her I'd leave her out of it... :( She said this wasn't the first time she'd recieved a message like this from him. She said she just keeps deleting them.

      But yeah, sorry, I kinda like this one and -- I know -- I'm a little bitch.

      Comment


        #4
        I don't know what to suggest kobudo. I got to screw your girlfriend so that my mind clears up. Tell her to do it (do me) for you, so that I can help you solve this riddle of what to do with the myspace ninjer.
        Read this for flexibility and injury prevention, this, this and this for supplementation, this on grip conditioning, and this on staph. New: On strenght standards, relationships and structural balance. Shoulder problems? Read this.

        My crapuous vlog and my blog of training, stuff and crap. NEW: Me, Mrs. Macho and our newborn baby.

        New To Weight Training? Get the StrongLifts 5x5 program and Rippetoe's "Starting Strength, 2nd Ed". Wanna build muscle/gain weight? Check this article. My review on Tactical Nutrition here.

        t-nation - Dissecting the deadlift. Anatomy and Muscle Balancing Videos.

        The street argument is retarded. BJJ is so much overkill for the street that its ridiculous. Unless you're the idiot that picks a fight with the high school wrestling team, barring knife or gun play, the opponent shouldn't make it past double leg + ground and pound - Osiris

        Comment


          #5
          The page is public again.

          Who I'd like to meet:

          Bruce Lee, Chuck Norris, Tito Ortiz, and Batman.
          I... I have nothing to say to that.

          Comment


            #6
            yes,after el macho it will be my turn,then you will definitly know what to do.
            i dont think the ninja boy is any threat to you,unless you walk around in silly outfits too..

            Comment


              #7
              Oh come now, I offer to try to give back to this community by feeding it a perfectly good LARPer to chew up and spit out, and all you guys want is T&A. What's wrong with you guys? Wait, nevermind...

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by kobudo
                Oh come now,... What's wrong with you guys?
                Um...well at present it looks like we all want to hump your girlfriend...
                :blob9:

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by Lebell
                  i dont think the ninja boy is any threat to you,unless you walk around in silly outfits too..
                  Oh, I know he's not a threat, it's just that this was the first ninjer I've caught on the wild tubes of the internets by myself, alone and untouched, who has hopefully never heard of this place. Just asking if it was cool to drag him in kicking and screaming is all.

                  As far as the silly outfits go I'm okay there, the only silly outfit I wear involves complete nudity and a strategically-placed birthday hat, but I've revealed too much of my personal life already.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Well it depends.
                    It says that he also studied Muay Thai and Judo...maybe he trains sprt arts to be effective and ninjutsu to pick up ladies...I don't know...if he tells the truth there...he may kick your arse and get your girl ala "No retreat no surrender"

                    "You see that punk...She knows who's the best!"

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Originally posted by Rubber Tanto
                      Well it depends.
                      It says that he also studied Muay Thai and Judo...maybe he trains sprt arts to be effective and ninjutsu to pick up ladies...I don't know...
                      Right now I'm going with "lies about his MA expertise to inflate his e-penis." For a moment after reading your post, I thought, "hey, maybe this guy does have extensive training in more than four different MAs." Then I returned to my senses.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Originally posted by kobudo

                        As far as the silly outfits go I'm okay there, the only silly outfit I wear involves complete nudity and a strategically-placed birthday hat, but I've revealed too much of my personal life already.
                        pcz on mssngr plz


                        definitly invite the ninjaguy to this forum btw.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Originally posted by Rubber Tanto
                          Um...well at present it looks like we all want to hump your girlfriend...
                          :blob9:
                          Would that qualify as a throwdown? :icon_scra


                          Originally posted by kobudo
                          I promised her I'd leave her out of it... :( She said this wasn't the first time she'd recieved a message like this from him. She said she just keeps deleting them.

                          But yeah, sorry, I kinda like this one and -- I know -- I'm a little bitch.
                          Uhm, dude, she could, like, click on the "Abuse" link, you know.
                          Read this for flexibility and injury prevention, this, this and this for supplementation, this on grip conditioning, and this on staph. New: On strenght standards, relationships and structural balance. Shoulder problems? Read this.

                          My crapuous vlog and my blog of training, stuff and crap. NEW: Me, Mrs. Macho and our newborn baby.

                          New To Weight Training? Get the StrongLifts 5x5 program and Rippetoe's "Starting Strength, 2nd Ed". Wanna build muscle/gain weight? Check this article. My review on Tactical Nutrition here.

                          t-nation - Dissecting the deadlift. Anatomy and Muscle Balancing Videos.

                          The street argument is retarded. BJJ is so much overkill for the street that its ridiculous. Unless you're the idiot that picks a fight with the high school wrestling team, barring knife or gun play, the opponent shouldn't make it past double leg + ground and pound - Osiris

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Originally posted by El Macho
                            Would that qualify as a throwdown? :icon_scra
                            I'd say more of a seminar where she shows us how she deals with multiples...:lame:

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Originally posted by El Macho
                              Uhm, dude, she could, like, click on the "Abuse" link, you know.
                              She said that it's not that frequently, but "every now and then." Honestly, I didn't really think of it as abuse, in my opinion -- just stupidity. She forwarded it to me because she found it amusing. I saw his profile and the first thought was "The people on Bullshido would rip him a new ass." Really, the message seemed generic enough that he probably sends it out to lots of different women and sees who might take him up on it.

                              Comment

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