Your significant other's apathy...

[DAYoung]

See? All the intellige-...er...thoughtf-...no...ummm...all the repressed homosexuals agree with me.

And that's a good thing - they're keenly attuned to acute psychic conflict.

[money]

If you set up a mock break-in to prove your point, all you'd be proving is that she should get a divorce.

[Matsufubu]

If you set up a mock break-in to prove your point, all you'd be proving is that she should get a divorce.

Agreed, that would be a step too far in proving your point.

In my experience, women don't have the same consciousness for self-protection as men do. Hell, maybe I'm a sexist, but I'm just saying my piece. Perhaps man's traditional role as protector and woman's role as protected is responsible for making women so passive about the issue, especially if you are a 'manly' man like me :besos:

It may well be that she sees protection of the house and herself as your role. The fact that you are absent much of the time is perhaps the reason that nothing is done. It sounds like your house has loads of security that you have installed. That will only further confirm her view of you as the protector and her as the protected.

When you're back at home, talk to her. Ask her what she'd do if X were to happen, with the way she does things now. Ask her if she thinks that you are being overprotective or paranoid - if she thinks you are then she will ignore what you say on the issue of security. You have to make her see the sense in what you are telling her. Discuss it, make it a two-way thing. Lecturing her will put her into a child role, and children love to be rebellious, even at their own risk. I don't know what you need to say; I don't know you or your wife. I agree with other posters about not making it all about her: make it about the house, the dogs, the kids (if you have any, or if not, then kids in the future), and ALSO her. I dunno, find out if anything bad has happened on your block (assaults, muggings, burglary, etc), and tell her about them, and how she intends to prevent it happening to your house and family.

I used to date a girl who was hopelessly naive and got raped. That has made me determined not to allow it to happen to other girls I've dated, and FUCK, does it frustrate me when I hear BS examples of 'girl power' attitude from them when they've never had anything bad happen to them. IMO, female empowerment has gone so far as to convince many women that they are invunerable.

Best of luck to you.

[Lebell]

man this thread reminds me of dr Ruth for some reason...
all the subconcious stuff and all.

[Teh El Macho]

This thread reminds me of one of my younger sisters... and sometime my mom. They like walk in la-la land. Fortunately they live in a good neighbourhood and are not alone... BUT, shit, I wish they weren't so rosy-colored sometimes.

There is no good solution this type of situation. Really. You either see things rosy (until shit hits the fan) or you don't.

[colonelpong2]

In your case; if you really want to have a mock break in, don't have friends do it... have these guys do it:

http://dsc.discovery.com/fansites/it...bios/bios.html

Hey.... forget that. Get those discount ninjers from that thread a while back!

[colonelpong2]

man this thread reminds me of dr Ruth for some reason...
all the subconcious stuff and all.

You mean stupid armch chair psychologist wannabe's spouting shit they heard on tv? Yep, sounds right to me

[Yrkoon9]

Okay, UPDATE. And no, I haven't talked to her since I started this thread.

We have 2 dogs. A 70lbs pit and a 70lbs shepard mix. I doubt seriously if either would 'attack' - but they growl and bark at strangers. So I dunno.

I HAVE taken her to the range. She did not like it and would not come back. I tricked her into it when I went. I knew it was lady's day with no range fee and gun rentals were free. So I bought a box of ammo and jedi'd her into shooting it.

We had an 'incident' that should have put the fear of god into her. I have told the story about waking up to the sound of breaking glass at 3am when visiting her Gmother (no phone in room, and no weapon in the house) where she got really freaked the fuck out. Another time someone came up the back door of our condo just minutes before I got home and started asking if she was home alone and weird shit like that. Freaked her out a little bit.

Set her up and freak her out? No thanks.
Move out the area? Can't. It is 1 mile away from her school. She loves the place. On top of that...it's in her name.

Now seriously. I am at my wits end. We have been married for 9 years (known her for 20 years) and I have ALWAYS been there to do my job. That is to defend the home. And right now I cannot do that. We are looking at me being GONE for like 2 years. I cannot provide the security that I once did. So I tried to put some new measures in place. But it isn't enough. I am asking her to be a little more active in the role while I am gone. And the result is I am actually being sabotoged.

[SOUL_FIGHTER]

Maybe she's not worried about it because there pretty much is no real threat.

When it really comes down to it, all you really need to do to protect yourself is lock your doors and windows. Phone in every room is a good idea too.

But I think weapons in everyroom are counter productive. What'll you do if somebody steals your weapons when you're not around? Great - you'd be supplying illegal arms to criminals.

[Yrkoon9]

I knew a real genius would show up eventually.


No real threat. LOL. Does the rainbow you live on taste like cheese?
Locks and phones are like magic circles and wards.
What if criminals steal my money when I am not around and they buy guns? ohh nooz. Criminals with gunz~

[Bang!]

Yeah, don't leave your martial art books lying around either, or all this training will have been for naught.

[DAYoung]

Okay, UPDATE. And no, I haven't talked to her since I started this thread.

We have 2 dogs. A 70lbs pit and a 70lbs shepard mix. I doubt seriously if either would 'attack' - but they growl and bark at strangers. So I dunno.

I HAVE taken her to the range. She did not like it and would not come back. I tricked her into it when I went. I knew it was lady's day with no range fee and gun rentals were free. So I bought a box of ammo and jedi'd her into shooting it.

We had an 'incident' that should have put the fear of god into her. I have told the story about waking up to the sound of breaking glass at 3am when visiting her Gmother (no phone in room, and no weapon in the house) where she got really freaked the fuck out. Another time someone came up the back door of our condo just minutes before I got home and started asking if she was home alone and weird shit like that. Freaked her out a little bit.

Set her up and freak her out? No thanks.
Move out the area? Can't. It is 1 mile away from her school. She loves the place. On top of that...it's in her name.

Now seriously. I am at my wits end. We have been married for 9 years (known her for 20 years) and I have ALWAYS been there to do my job. That is to defend the home. And right now I cannot do that. We are looking at me being GONE for like 2 years. I cannot provide the security that I once did. So I tried to put some new measures in place. But it isn't enough. I am asking her to be a little more active in the role while I am gone. And the result is I am actually being sabotoged.

And she won't do it for you? For you peace of mind while you're away?

[Cullion]

Tell her you know it all seems unreasonable, but if she would do it just for you then you'd feel much better.

BTW: Why did a married man in his 30s decide to up and join the military ? When my midlife crisis gets full blown I'm just going to buy a second hand Porsche.

[chingythingy]

I knew a real genius would show up eventually.

Bullshido is chock full of real genius. :new_rainf

[Bang!]

Get her a "cute" gun.

Like this?