Three guys are sitting around in a Jiu Jitsu Club...

[Bustardo]

So three of us are sitting around after Jiu jitsu class (My instructor, my friend Mike and I) and in walks this wierd looking guy. They Teach Kung Fu and BJJ at our club, so this wacko must have seen the sign on the door.

The wierd looking guy comes into the room and the conversaion goes like this:

Whacko: "Hey! I want to show you a sumthin'!"
Jim(The BJJ and Kung Fu Instructor): "Ok"
Whacko: ".... wait.... Go get a pole!"
Jim: *Hesitates* goes and grabs a pole off the wall
Whacko: "Ok... Now swing it at me really slow!"
Jim: *swings the pole arm at him very slowly*
Whacko: *Sticks arm up to absorb the poles impact, then grabs the pole and pulls on it*
Jim: *Lets go of pole* You know, if someone swung that at you hard, you couldn't block it like that, it'd either break your arm or your arm would hurt so bad you probably wouldn't be able to grab it.
Whacko: *Laughs* OK! Back to the drawing board

He then goes to show us another technique he developed in which he grabs the hand which swings the pole and disarms the attacker. To which Jim asked "How would you get that close? If you tried that I'd hit you before you could even get that close... etc"
To which the whacko says, "Back to the drawing board!!!"

All three of us were trying really hard not to laugh, but some laughter slipped out. When he noticed I said, "I can't believe no one has thought of these before, let me record these techniques!" To which the whacko agreed.

Here is his "Method of attacking three guys"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5T13-o1BNwY

Here is his "Pole arm Techniques #1"
My Friend Mike is playing along in these, acting like the whacko's techniques are "Teh Deadly"

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y3FLdJznPxs


Here is his "Pole Arm Technique #2"
in this one he tells us his name, "David Davis". The New master of Kung Fu has been discovered:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qx-Bc9oWhWk




I have one more where he shows "Forms" in which Jim walks behind him and says "I better stay back or I might get hurt" I'm waiting for You Tube to process it.

[MacWombat]

Uhh, any possibility that this guy might be handicapped or fucking with you? If not, what a find!

[wooden dummy]

Uhh, any possibility that this guy might be handicapped ...

That fits the bill.

[HearWa]

Wow, what an interesting way to spend an evening...

[RaiNnyX4]

Martial arts studios are lightning rods for "t3h krazy".

[Bustardo]

Uhh, any possibility that this guy might be handicapped or fucking with you? If not, what a find!

We suspect he was... Still a find!


As a side note we were NOT mean to him in any way. We asked if we could record his "awesome technique" and he agreed. We made him Think he was T3h D34Dly! and he left very happy.

[MacWombat]

Fair enough. Then again, some stuff made by non-handicapped people is just as bad.

[chaosexmachina]

Let's hope nobody with a staff attacks him on the street...

[Torec_Scrail]

Let's hope nobody with a staff attacks him on the street...

I was thinkin, its pretty damn low to attack some1 like that, but you know, after some of the news stories of what fucking KIDS are doing to elderly and disabled...wouldnt suprise me.

[MacWombat]

You're right Torec_Scrail. You should watch this documentary called "A Clockwork Orange." Really opened my eyes.

[no_god]

Uhh, any possibility that this guy might be handicapped....

Drugs came to my mind before handicap....
lots and lots of drugs.

[halfcut]

Wait a minute, I recognize that place. You train with Jim Burchfield at the american fitness center. I use to train there before I joined the army. In fact I'll be there next month when I get out. Man weird people used to walk in off the street all the time.

[Bustardo]

Wait a minute, I recognize that place. You train with Jim Burchfield at the american fitness center. I use to train there before I joined the army. In fact I'll be there next month when I get out. Man weird people used to walk in off the street all the time.

Wow I'm impressed! Hope to see you there next Month!
My name's Chris, I'm a shitty BJJ newb.

[halfcut]

My name's Dave. I started training there in 2001 I'm a blue belt now from a different school. I'll be there around December 17th or so for a week or two. I need to give Jim a call and this thread kind of reminded me to do it. I still talk to Kelvin pretty regularly but that's about it.

[leere_form]

there's a guy like this who wanders into the university "chinese karate" (a shaolin-do ripoff = a ripoff of a ripoff) club from time to time to teach "shotokan"

he's old, crazy, and wears a dirty gi. talks about how hot okinawa is and um, dropping into horse stances to punch laterally or something. i vividly remember him hitting his only "student" (someone also kinda crazy) with a shinai or something and saying "do not question sensei!! he knows all sees all and does all!!"

anyway, your crazy visitor seems, uh, equally knowledgable. maybe they learned from the same video or something.