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Your Martial Art Sucks(A Rant)

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    Your Martial Art Sucks(A Rant)

    Yes i said it..

    Why? Because its not as good as my art, its not effective, and because i just fucking said so. You spend your time training your fag techniques in a fag fashion for a fag ranking. If your training was any less effective, you'd get more results out of running around in your grandma's underwear spreading peanut butter on yourself and singing "Hooked on a Feeling".

    Your techniques suck. They fall apart under resistence, and most of them couldn't be pulled off any easier than Superman's pecker. Not only do your techniques themselves suck, but the way you perform them sucks. You practice maybe two hours, two days a week, and spend the rest of the week sitting your fat ass at your desk job eating Ho-Ho's and tater chips and arguing on internet boards about art lineages and politics.

    Your instructor sucks, if for nothing else, for allowing you to be such a pussy and remain a part of his school. He should be beating the cookie dough out of your ass every chance he gets, but most likely, he won't have time because he's busy in the office quite often, balancing out the school's books from the latest dues, belt test fees, Organization fees, and whatever other bullshit fees he can slap on.

    Your outlook on Martial Arts sucks. You prefer to mediate, read books, and do mundane shit that you think is training, like duck walking from the computer to the refrigerator. You do these things instead of pushing yourself, and still expect to be a badass. You think that next belt rank is going to mean an automatic increase in your badness of ass, so you study for it instead of actually training.

    You have the ignorance and audacity to think that if you had a friend who studied Mixed Martial Arts, you'd probably save his life by fighting off the multiple opponents with your deadly force if the two of you ever got jumped.

    If someone calls your bullshit and challenges you, you immediately say such things as "I'll just bring my gun." If that's the case, you are studying MA for absolutely nothing. You're wasting your time. And why do you say such things? Two Reasons: #1...deep down you know the shit you train in doesn't work, and #2...you're scared of defeat..scared of losing face.

    So you go right ahead and keep doing what you're doing. It makes me no difference. Just don't ever speak to me in a condescending way as if you think you could kick my ass, otherwise you may end up just having to prove it.


    10-4, over & out.

    #2
    Help me find the "Make public this PM" button.

    Comment


      #3
      Originally posted by Shinkengata
      . . . you'd get more results out of running around in your grandma's underwear spreading peanut butter on yourself and singing "Hooked on a Feeling".
      Really? Do it like harness Chi or something?

      Do you have to also sing the Ooogachakachaka part?

      --J.D.

      Comment


        #4
        Originally posted by Doctor X
        Do you have to also sing the Ooogachakachaka part?
        What the hell kind of song would it be without it?

        Comment


          #5
          I can't stop this feeling
          Deep inside of me.
          Girl, you just don't realize
          What you do to me.
          When you hold me
          In your arms so tight,
          You let me know,
          Everythings alright, ahahah

          I'm hooked on a feeling,
          I'm high on believing,
          That your in love with me.

          Lips as sweet as candy.
          Their taste stays on my mind.
          Girl, you keep me thirsty for another cup of wine.

          I got it bad for you girl,
          But I don't need a cure,
          I'll just stay addicted, If I can endure
          All the good love, when we're all alone
          Keep it up girl, yeah you turn me on.

          I'mmm, I'mmm Hooked on a feeling.
          I'm high on believing that your in love with me.
          All the good love, when we're all alone
          Keep it up girl, yeah you turn me on.

          Ahaha I'm hooked on a feeling,
          I'm high on believing,
          That your in love with me.

          I'm hooked on a feeling,
          I'm high on believing,
          That your in love with me.

          I say I'm hooked on a feeling,
          And I'm high on believing,
          That your in love with me.
          I'm hooked on a feeling.

          Damn I need a Muay Thai gym in my area..............

          Comment


            #6
            Your instructor sucks, if for nothing else, for allowing you to be such a pussy and remain a part of his school.

            That shit had me crackin up bro, good call.

            Comment


              #7
              Not quite sure if this really was JUST a rant, or you were merely applying choji oil to your comedic sword, or whatever.

              As a rant, I'd have to say it's been said before, so... yah... I find your wrtiings to be highly refined and well written, so I'll totally overlook this lapse.

              I feel that it also fails as a peice of comedic writing, due to the fct that your comedy value seems to be dirctly linked to the amount of time invested in your works (i.e. the diray series). The longer they go on, the funnier it is (which, I might add, is a hell of a gift, most htings get LESS funny as time goes on).

              Might I suggest that you narrow the topic of your rants, so as to allow yourself the oppurtunity to give them the attention to deatail you normally pay to your writings. This one felt a bit... broad.

              If it was just a rant, and was not intended to be funny, then by all means, ignore my blabbering.

              Comment


                #8
                This was, indeed, merely a rant. Less than that, actually...just a way to kill time.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by Shinkengata
                  This was, indeed, merely a rant. Less than that, actually...just a way to kill time.
                  Rant away, then, my son, rant away.

                  I kill time with a roundhouse kick to time's face, but rants work too.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by Shinkengata
                    Yes i said it..

                    Why? Because its not as good as my art, its not effective, and because i just fucking said so. You spend your time training your fag techniques in a fag fashion for a fag ranking. If your training was any less effective, you'd get more results out of running around in your grandma's underwear spreading peanut butter on yourself and singing "Hooked on a Feeling".

                    Your techniques suck. They fall apart under resistence, and most of them couldn't be pulled off any easier than Superman's pecker. Not only do your techniques themselves suck, but the way you perform them sucks. You practice maybe two hours, two days a week, and spend the rest of the week sitting your fat ass at your desk job eating Ho-Ho's and tater chips and arguing on internet boards about art lineages and politics.

                    Your instructor sucks, if for nothing else, for allowing you to be such a pussy and remain a part of his school. He should be beating the cookie dough out of your ass every chance he gets, but most likely, he won't have time because he's busy in the office quite often, balancing out the school's books from the latest dues, belt test fees, Organization fees, and whatever other bullshit fees he can slap on.

                    Your outlook on Martial Arts sucks. You prefer to mediate, read books, and do mundane shit that you think is training, like duck walking from the computer to the refrigerator. You do these things instead of pushing yourself, and still expect to be a badass. You think that next belt rank is going to mean an automatic increase in your badness of ass, so you study for it instead of actually training.

                    You have the ignorance and audacity to think that if you had a friend who studied Mixed Martial Arts, you'd probably save his life by fighting off the multiple opponents with your deadly force if the two of you ever got jumped.

                    If someone calls your bullshit and challenges you, you immediately say such things as "I'll just bring my gun." If that's the case, you are studying MA for absolutely nothing. You're wasting your time. And why do you say such things? Two Reasons: #1...deep down you know the shit you train in doesn't work, and #2...you're scared of defeat..scared of losing face.

                    So you go right ahead and keep doing what you're doing. It makes me no difference. Just don't ever speak to me in a condescending way as if you think you could kick my ass, otherwise you may end up just having to prove it.


                    10-4, over & out.
                    The thing is though, not everybody studies martial arts for the same reasons. Would you tell a 60 year old man who was interested in learning a martial art to go and join a muay Thai class. Might not be a good idea. Also, some people just want to study the martial art for the actual art side of it, and not the fighting side. Others may wish to take some techniques from that art, and apply it to their own art. So to say that somebody is a moron for choosing to study an art other than MMA, or Muay Thai, etc, is wrong, as you have to consider all of the above. However, yes, there are some morons who fell like you have stated, and they annoy me!

                    Comment


                      #11
                      Originally posted by Western Martial
                      The thing is though, not everybody studies martial arts for the same reasons. Would you tell a 60 year old man who was interested in learning a martial art to go and join a muay Thai class. Might not be a good idea. Also, some people just want to study the martial art for the actual art side of it, and not the fighting side. Others may wish to take some techniques from that art, and apply it to their own art. So to say that somebody is a moron for choosing to study an art other than MMA, or Muay Thai, etc, is wrong, as you have to consider all of the above. However, yes, there are some morons who fell like you have stated, and they annoy me!
                      What would you tell a 60 year old man interested in learning Football (as in Pigskin)? Or Rugby?

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Originally posted by Samfoo
                        What would you tell a 60 year old man interested in learning Football (as in Pigskin)? Or Rugby?
                        That's completely different. there arn't many different branches of football. There arne't any alternatives, and football is at a much lower intensity than some martial arts.

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Originally posted by Western Martial
                          That's completely different.
                          No it's not. Both are physically demanding activities with a high correllation of physical fitness to performance.

                          there arn't many different branches of football. There arne't any alternatives,
                          That's the point. There aren't alternatives because competition is the primary goal of football and thus constant improvement of both the mental and physical aspect of the game is necessary. There aren't different branches of football like there are martial arts because it would be football if you were just running plays by yourself all the time and never tried it against another team.

                          and football is at a much lower intensity than some martial arts.
                          Those aren't martial arts.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Originally posted by Shinkengata
                            Yes i said it..

                            Why? Because its not as good as my art, its not effective, and because i just fucking said so. You spend your time training your fag techniques in a fag fashion for a fag ranking. If your training was any less effective, you'd get more results out of running around in your grandma's underwear spreading peanut butter on yourself and singing "Hooked on a Feeling".

                            Your techniques suck. They fall apart under resistence, and most of them couldn't be pulled off any easier than Superman's pecker. Not only do your techniques themselves suck, but the way you perform them sucks. You practice maybe two hours, two days a week, and spend the rest of the week sitting your fat ass at your desk job eating Ho-Ho's and tater chips and arguing on internet boards about art lineages and politics.

                            Your instructor sucks, if for nothing else, for allowing you to be such a pussy and remain a part of his school. He should be beating the cookie dough out of your ass every chance he gets, but most likely, he won't have time because he's busy in the office quite often, balancing out the school's books from the latest dues, belt test fees, Organization fees, and whatever other bullshit fees he can slap on.

                            Your outlook on Martial Arts sucks. You prefer to mediate, read books, and do mundane shit that you think is training, like duck walking from the computer to the refrigerator. You do these things instead of pushing yourself, and still expect to be a badass. You think that next belt rank is going to mean an automatic increase in your badness of ass, so you study for it instead of actually training.

                            You have the ignorance and audacity to think that if you had a friend who studied Mixed Martial Arts, you'd probably save his life by fighting off the multiple opponents with your deadly force if the two of you ever got jumped.

                            If someone calls your bullshit and challenges you, you immediately say such things as "I'll just bring my gun." If that's the case, you are studying MA for absolutely nothing. You're wasting your time. And why do you say such things? Two Reasons: #1...deep down you know the shit you train in doesn't work, and #2...you're scared of defeat..scared of losing face.

                            So you go right ahead and keep doing what you're doing. It makes me no difference. Just don't ever speak to me in a condescending way as if you think you could kick my ass, otherwise you may end up just having to prove it.


                            10-4, over & out.
                            *looks over shoulder*

                            Who are you talking to?

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Originally posted by Samfoo
                              No it's not. Both are physically demanding activities with a high correllation of physical fitness to performance.



                              That's the point. There aren't alternatives because competition is the primary goal of football and thus constant improvement of both the mental and physical aspect of the game is necessary. There aren't different branches of football like there are martial arts because it would be football if you were just running plays by yourself all the time and never tried it against another team.
                              Ok. But how long do you think a sixty year old guy is gonna survive in a game of football if he has no previous experience. In Martial Arts, to throw him into something like Muay Thai, would be to pretty much send him to be killed. However, if he were to develop a certain level of fitness, and an understanding of martial arts, maybe he'd be able to handle something like MT.



                              Those aren't martial arts.
                              How are you qualified to determine what a martial art is? I have already said what i would say now in my earlier thread.

                              Comment

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