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Opening a new MMA School

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  • PDA
    replied
    I wonder if he is still going to open his school ?

    Now he has received our blessing .

    Leave a comment:


  • BackFistMonkey
    replied
    Originally posted by hungryjoe View Post
    Winner winner chicken dinner! How do keep enemies lit? Inquiring minds need to know.

    Will you consider franchising? I may know that Native American karate master. Would that possibly be Little Raw Ass of the No Wipee Tribe? I have personally smelled him in action.

    You are awesome.
    Jesus Christ what's his face was such a wanker.
    Wait ... you talking about one fuck face in history who fuckes with people legally or that fuck face in in louisiana with the Gator Rolling JJ or that tomahawk fighting fellow out west?

    Leave a comment:


  • hungryjoe
    replied
    Originally posted by omoplatypus View Post
    Hey guys, I'm trying to open up an MMA school.

    I am totes quallified to teach wushu based MMA because I was in the Jamaican Operating Indiscreetly Ninja Troop (we smoked our enemies). I have my discharge paperwork, but the Canadian Prime Minister says I can't show it to you.

    I learned how to do wushu from a Native American karate master back in the 90s, while I was doing security for New Kids on the Block.

    I also watched the documentary Red Belt so I think I'll teach BJJ as well. I even invented a move where you put someone's arm against your chest and hyperextend the elbow. I call it the arm against chest elbow hyperextension.

    I was also the National Kickboxing Champion of Oregon. I got a trophy, but it melted when I left it in my car. You can look me up on the internet, but a house fire deleted the website.

    Oh, and I can box. I have boxed lots of people and won all the time. I'm beating someone in a championship match while typing this.

    So, tell me I'm awesome, and give me advice that someone with my credentials should already have, or I'm just going to rage quit.

    Thanks!
    Winner winner chicken dinner! How do keep enemies lit? Inquiring minds need to know.

    Will you consider franchising? I may know that Native American karate master. Would that possibly be Little Raw Ass of the No Wipee Tribe? I have personally smelled him in action.

    You are awesome.

    Leave a comment:


  • omoplatypus
    replied
    Hey guys, I'm trying to open up an MMA school.

    I am totes quallified to teach wushu based MMA because I was in the Jamaican Operating Indiscreetly Ninja Troop (we smoked our enemies). I have my discharge paperwork, but the Canadian Prime Minister says I can't show it to you.

    I learned how to do wushu from a Native American karate master back in the 90s, while I was doing security for New Kids on the Block.

    I also watched the documentary Red Belt so I think I'll teach BJJ as well. I even invented a move where you put someone's arm against your chest and hyperextend the elbow. I call it the arm against chest elbow hyperextension.

    I was also the National Kickboxing Champion of Oregon. I got a trophy, but it melted when I left it in my car. You can look me up on the internet, but a house fire deleted the website.

    Oh, and I can box. I have boxed lots of people and won all the time. I'm beating someone in a championship match while typing this.

    So, tell me I'm awesome, and give me advice that someone with my credentials should already have, or I'm just going to rage quit.

    Thanks!

    Leave a comment:


  • Diesel_tke
    replied
    Well, this thread went the way I thought it would.

    Leave a comment:


  • GrouchyOldMan
    replied
    Originally posted by ermghoti View Post
    Or hates cows.
    These are not mutually exclusive concepts.

    Leave a comment:


  • ermghoti
    replied
    Originally posted by Raycetpfl View Post
    Pastrami is proof god loves jews.
    Or hates cows.

    Leave a comment:


  • BackFistMonkey
    replied
    I miss Nathan91. I thought he and I had something special going on... I never get to help these days.

    Leave a comment:


  • Dr. Gonzo
    replied
    Originally posted by PDA View Post
    As is the IMF .

    What happened to OP?

    Retired elsewhere on the Internet to talk smack about Bullshido "wahhh they dont really expose bullshit wahhh they just bully people wahhh they dont know about the real krav wahhhhh their racist wahhh they only believe in two genders wahhhhhhh "
    Never look a gift horse in the mouth, PDA.

    Leave a comment:


  • PDA
    replied
    Originally posted by Raycetpfl View Post
    Pastrami is proof god loves jews.
    As is the IMF .

    What happened to OP?

    Retired elsewhere on the Internet to talk smack about Bullshido "wahhh they dont really expose bullshit wahhh they just bully people wahhh they dont know about the real krav wahhhhh their racist wahhh they only believe in two genders wahhhhhhh "

    Leave a comment:


  • Raycetpfl
    replied
    Originally posted by omoplatypus View Post
    Possibly so. I don't know. He does type very similar to newly immigrated Jews. That's all I'm saying. Also, since he claims to have grown up in the USSR, English could be a 3rd or 4th language.

    You obviously have a lot more knowledge on the subjects at hand. So, take it away, maven. I'll just be shnorring at the buffet, noshing on the free kosher pastrami and crackers.
    Pastrami is proof god loves jews.

    Leave a comment:


  • goodlun
    replied
    This is stupid, USSR + Isreli, um yeah it's time for you to develop a systema krav hybrid style. Then you can laugh at all of us when you have a chain of McDojos all over the south. Make sure your training uniforms are all 5.11 tactical stuffs. I mean you probably won't be teaching people how to worth a damn but who cares

    Leave a comment:


  • ksennin
    replied
    Since I live in a Central American country, there is very little regulated MMA/BJJ available. The first people who came over from other countries to open schools claimed ranks that I found highly suspect and did not last long. The president of the local BJJ association is actually a former judo competitor who crosstrained in BJJ and claims to hold a black belt in it, but I have not seen any accreditation, and of course, he claims to have trained at the Gokor/LaBell gym and produced some pictures, but they can from a one-time visit for all I know.

    And this sort of exaggeration of rank and status is even bigger in the local karate circles. We have a very small, pathetic karate community here, and somehow have shihans of 6th and 5th dan status or more who I have never seen training in over a decade yet keep piling up dan degrees.

    I am rather glad at least the global BJJ seems to do more serious policing of its ranks. The bs from crap instructors helped a lot to make martial arts matters of ridicule at least over here.

    Leave a comment:


  • PDA
    replied
    Originally posted by Michael Tzadok View Post
    So if the Admins of this site were to contact Ran Nakash(head of IDF KM instruction) he would verify this claim? That you were offered an instructorship at the Wingate IDF KM training facility?



    Which belt and who granted it to you?


    Well last I checked Tenth Planet is the only affiliation that grants belts purely on no-Gi, and they don't exist in Israel. So... Do you have a BJJ belt as you stated above or don't you? You seem to be wavering on this.


    Proof of all of the above please, especially of the military service.



    The video actually says [Flotilla 13](Israeli version of Navy Seals)- Advanced Krav Maga Instruction in the elite unit. Flotilla 13 is, last I checked one of the few professional units in the Israeli military made of people that have signed on for an additional 6yrs(minimum) after the conclusion of their mandatory 3yr stint, and do this instead of conscript service. I would hope that an elite unit that likes to style itself as the equivalent of Delta Force or Seal Team 6 has some H2H training. Unfortunately what is shown in that video is still very compliant crap against horribly staged attacks that would almost never go down that way in real life. Just look at live leaks. What is killing me here is that you seem incapable of reading or understanding the Hebrew of the things you are posting.


    Because you are coming off as a fraud.




    This seams like another one of those "i know ill make friends with them so i can hide in plane sight" threads.

    Should have read more before he posted.
    Last edited by PDA; 7/06/2017 6:45am, .

    Leave a comment:


  • ksennin
    replied
    Originally posted by omoplatypus View Post
    When I state I am a karate guy I do it with full self-awareness.

    Leave a comment:

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