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Steven Seagal Is the Lamest Guy Ever

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    Steven Seagal Is the Lamest Guy Ever

    I found this on the internet today and felt I should share it with you all:

    http://www.vice.com/read/steven-seag...amest-guy-ever

    I'd post the whole article but it contains video and audio inbeds (not that you want to hear Steve sing...)

    Discuss, Rofl, Enjoy

    #2
    Needs more about the Gene LeBell part.

    Comment


      #3
      They forgot what a dick he was to his first wife, and how Anderson Silva trolled him into believing he was relevant to MMA.
      Shut the hell up and train.

      Comment


        #4
        They also forgot to mention that he married into his Aikido rank, and into his Aikido dojo.

        Comment


          #5
          More info on Silva trolling him, Jnp?

          I was watching Like Water last night and there was a part where Silva called Seagal "sensei" to his face and I haven't really paid enough attention to the goings on outside the cage to hear that it was a troll job.
          GET A RED BELT OR DIE TRYIN'.
          Originally posted by Devil
          I think Battlefields and I had a spirited discussion once about who was the biggest narcissist. We both wanted the title but at the end of the day I had to concede defeat. Can't win 'em all.
          Originally posted by BackFistMonkey
          I <3 Battlefields...

          Comment


            #6
            Originally posted by Eudemic View Post
            They also forgot to mention that he married into his Aikido rank, and into his Aikido dojo.
            Or received his 7th dan after "donating" a million dollars to Aikido Hombu Jojo.

            Comment


              #7
              "I am hoping that I can be known as a great writer and actor some day, rather than a sex symbol." - Steven Seagal (from the article).

              --

              L.O.L.

              Comment


                #8
                To the folks who noted that they were incomplete in their criticism of steven segal (no relation to katie segal) I'd like to point out that Vice magazine:

                a) accepts submissions
                b) likes cruel snaky writers
                c) pays

                Just a thought

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by Rock Ape View Post
                  Or received his 7th dan after "donating" a million dollars to Aikido Hombu Jojo.
                  Maybe I'm misremembering, and rather than marry into the rank he bought the '7th dan and a wife' package.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by Eudemic View Post
                    Maybe I'm misremembering, and rather than marry into the rank he bought the '7th dan and a wife' package.
                    He thought he was buying a McDonlads ends up with a McDojo ... boy that must have been a bummer.

                    Comment


                      #11
                      HE MAY OR MAY NOT HAVE HAD SEVERAL SEX SLAVES

                      In 2010, a 23-year-old former model who was hired as Steven's "executive assistant" claims that, when she showed up to work for her first day, she learned that "Mr. Seagal had been keeping two young female Russian 'attendants' on staff who were available for his sexual needs 24 hours a day, 7 days a week." He was sued for sexual harassment, illegal trafficking of females for sex, failure to prevent sexual harassment, retaliation, wrongful termination and false representation about employment. The matter was "resolved privately" by Steven's lawyer, and the case dismissed.
                      Holy shit thanks for the laugh, bro.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Originally posted by Eudemic View Post
                        Maybe I'm misremembering, and rather than marry into the rank he bought the '7th dan and a wife' package.
                        I see what you did there.

                        He was already a student of aikido (Shodan if my memory is correct) when he travelled to Japan. He met and married the daughter of an Aikido Dojo owner and, again if my memory is correct, was rapidly promoted to middle senior yudansha (reasons unknown to me)

                        In fairness, in his younger (leaner) days he had some ability (for a larping magic_pants wearer) his aikido was very dynamic and he seemed to cross train and study his aikido with people from other systems, Karate being an obvious one.

                        He's just guilty of believing his own hype and trying to carve an income stream in life. The latter being quite understandable, despite the god awful films and TV series he's made.

                        Apart from being the biggest douche to women (and of course his stunt partners).

                        You know he was the fight choreographer in the Film "The Challenge" right back as far as 1982, six years before his own acting debut.

                        Click image for larger version

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                        Comment


                          #13
                          Originally posted by Rock Ape View Post
                          He was already a student of aikido (Shodan if my memory is correct) when he travelled to Japan. He met and married the daughter of an Aikido Dojo owner and, again if my memory is correct, was rapidly promoted to middle senior yudansha (reasons unknown to me)
                          Sounds about right to me. I just agree with the speculation that marrying the daughter of the dojo owner influenced his rapid promotion, even though there isn't a clear or definite relationship. Just seems reasonable to me.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Originally posted by Rock Ape View Post
                            You know he was the fight choreographer in the Film "The Challenge" right back as far as 1982, six years before his own acting debut.

                            [ATTACH=CONFIG]14709[/ATTACH]
                            I need to see this.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              Originally posted by DerAuslander View Post
                              I need to see this.
                              If a movie has Toshiro Mifune in it, then yes.

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