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    Self-Defense for teen girl

    My daughter is getting bullied at school, and the parents, teachers and administrators have been of no help. I'm old school and I believe in handling your problems straight on. I'm thinking of signing my daughter up for kick boxing so that she will have some means of self-defense. From snooping on her telephone calls and reading her text messages with bigdaddyspy software, I found out that it is a group of jealous girls that are causing her trouble. This is retarded teen drama that has turned violent, and I plan to put an end to it.

    Janice

    #2
    Are there other schools she can transfer to?
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      #3
      Originally posted by mom2teengrls View Post
      This is retarded teen drama that has turned violent, and I plan to put an end to it.

      Janice
      Fistfights, even when won, hardly put an end to teen drama.

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        #4
        Kickboxing/Muay Thai and Judo etc. are very effective yet still take time to produce effective skills, and still may not end the bullying.
        For one thing you usually shouldn't punch someone or throw them because they said mean things.
        (I did not miss the implication of physical violence.)
        It sounds like you need a more immediate solution than MA classes.

        Comment


          #5
          What state do you live in? Depending on where you are, I know that a couple of states have mandated new "anti bullying" guidelines that school are mandated to follow. I would make sure that your school is in compliance with these laws.

          I think any kind of self defense can be great for any teen, but in conjunction with this you should be doing what you can to try to stop the situation the legal way. I will say to keep any and all correspondence you have with the school, in case this becomes a litigious matter.

          Also if your child is on an IEP , then you can have specific language written in where the school has to make concessions and adjustments around your child, and provide proof that they are doing so.

          Also, even though its tough, try and keep your cool. Whatever you choose to do, pursue it in a positive, calm manner. There might be parents in your area that have similar complaints and issues, try and coordinate with others in order to achieve your goals.

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            #6
            Janice,

            As a school teacher and martial arts instructor please be very adamant with the school officials about the problems your daughter is having. Have a meeting with them and document the problems your daughter is having with the other students and get to the bottom of it ASAP. There are always two sides to the story and it is very important that they are represented and put into some type of writing to insure that steps can be taken to get things done.

            I know school officials don't want to start the process of dealing with bullying because it looks bad in them that such things are occurring in their school. Remain vigilant about it and document their efforts.

            Martial arts is not a magic pill for bullying either. It takes years for children to develop attributes from martial arts that will help them physically and mentally. Enrolling them in a martial arts program will benefit them don't get me wrong but don't think it will happen over night.

            Try talking to the parents of the other children in a non confrontational manner and work to help your daughter develop some cooping skills that will allow her to not be as effected by the others.

            I know this is a tough spot for you and your children but if you help them learn to deal with the situation instead of just trying to fix it yourself your daughters will be able to handle these types of situations later in life through experience.

            Remember every situation is different and nothing is guaranteed to work.

            Josh Artigue
            Judo is only gentle for the guy on top.

            Comment


              #7
              What the last two posters said. Also, go to a free consultation with a lawyer. My daughter was suspended for INSTIGATING at a zero tolerance school. She got less days than the two kids fighting, but they were all suspended.

              So, if the bullying is that bad you may need to look into legal action.

              Comment


                #8
                Originally posted by Permalost View Post
                Fistfights, even when won, hardly put an end to teen drama.
                Especially for girls.

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by Coach Josh View Post
                  Janice,

                  As a school teacher and martial arts instructor please be very adamant with the school officials about the problems your daughter is having. Have a meeting with them and document the problems your daughter is having with the other students and get to the bottom of it ASAP. There are always two sides to the story and it is very important that they are represented and put into some type of writing to insure that steps can be taken to get things done.

                  I know school officials don't want to start the process of dealing with bullying because it looks bad in them that such things are occurring in their school. Remain vigilant about it and document their efforts.

                  Martial arts is not a magic pill for bullying either. It takes years for children to develop attributes from martial arts that will help them physically and mentally. Enrolling them in a martial arts program will benefit them don't get me wrong but don't think it will happen over night.

                  Try talking to the parents of the other children in a non confrontational manner and work to help your daughter develop some cooping skills that will allow her to not be as effected by the others.

                  I know this is a tough spot for you and your children but if you help them learn to deal with the situation instead of just trying to fix it yourself your daughters will be able to handle these types of situations later in life through experience.

                  Remember every situation is different and nothing is guaranteed to work.

                  Josh Artigue
                  Wiser words could not be said.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    Originally posted by Coach Josh View Post
                    Janice,

                    [wisdom]

                    Josh Artigue
                    Anything other than this is inappropriate advice.

                    Also
                    Originally posted by mom2teengrls View Post
                    . From snooping on her telephone calls and reading her text messages with bigdaddyspy software,
                    ...
                    sigpic

                    Comment


                      #11
                      I was really unsure when I first responded if this was a spambot repping spy software to get information on your teens.

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Originally posted by judoka_uk View Post
                        Originally posted by Coach Josh View Post
                        Janice,

                        [wisdom]

                        Josh Artigue
                        Anything other than this is inappropriate advice.

                        Also

                        Originally posted by mom2teengrls View Post
                        From snooping on her telephone calls and reading her text messages with bigdaddyspy software.
                        Janice
                        ...
                        I'd just like to echo this post.
                        "So, yeah, Zen teachers may well insult you, work you to the bone, hit you with sticks, shout verbal abuse at you, and punch the shit out of you.
                        And when the shit's been punched out of you, you might just find that you're far better-off without it." - Vieux Normand

                        "So in short, BJJ wins again. BJJ, and chainmail." - TheMightyMcClaw

                        "On bullshido, your opinions are not sacred, neither are your feelings." - Scrapper

                        "You entered the lions' den. Don't bitch if you get eaten." - danniboi07

                        "Needless to say, it's much easier to clear a bunch of drunk kids out of your house when you're yelling GTFO and carrying a samurai sword." - DerAuslander

                        "Eventually, I realized it doesn't matter what art you train, what matters is the method in which you train. Training in an alive manner, under skilled and qualified instruction, is the single most important aspect of gaining martial skill. All else is window dressing." - JNP : Saying it how it is!

                        Comment


                          #13
                          Total agreement with Josh and ItIsFake on this. Would want to also point out that this is a leading influence on teens taking drastics measures and sometimes hurting themselves. Would also advise very close monitoring of your child and providing as positive an atmosphere and support as you can to help offset the negative influence they are receiving at school.

                          Comment


                            #14
                            I moved my kids, we have two schools close, because of an idiot principal. I also take one of my kids to a school, out of our boundaries, due to better curriculum. Sometimes leaving is the best option.

                            It is also cheaper than a lawyer.

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