"Disappointing"

[keke]

You guys probably don't want to hear a sad sob story about grappling, but I'm in the throes of almost wanting to quit judo/bjj. Anyways, I've been doing judo for the last two years and BJJ for the last year. Only a orange belt and two striped white belt. Our club had changed and these two black belts left to join a different one, because our club got too "soft", the teachers started to emphasis more technique and less randori. I look up to these two guys, they're pretty skilled and out class me in technique and weight. They stopped in for tonight and I hadn't rolled with them two for probably about a couple of months. I thought, why not give it a go, I picked up a few things in BJJ (mind you we were doing ne waza). So I went with him, we bowed and he started to do the whole turtle thing for the noobies. I thought alright, hes done this before. I take his back and proceeded to try and choke him. Long story short I failed and pulled guard and played from there and then to half guard as he was trying to break it. I tried to play some half guard and take his back (I've been experimenting a bit with half guard and wanted to progress in it). I couldn't get the underhook and he arm locked me. That's all fine and dandy but he then says... "Ivan, you're a disappointment. That was disappointing." That pretty much felt like my whole grappling progress went straight down the drain. Normally, I don't care what other people even care to say about me, but these guys I kinda looked up to and wanted to emulate.

After that, the other black belt needed someone and so, hell I'll try to redeem myself. So he turtles up too. He let me try to choke him, I pretty much failed at it, there was no way my hand could reach deep into his collar. But what frustrated me was he started to look at his nails and pretended to look at a watch. I felt like they pretty much summed up my grappling experience - inadequate and almost regressing to a point. Anyways, just wanted to feel what you guys think, anyone had this experience? I mean they're cool, but I thought that was probably the most asshole thing they did.

Long story short, black belt called me a disappointment and I feel like I'm seriously lacking focus and progress. ( I feel like half of you are going to call me a pussy, especially Omega I JUST FEEL IT )

edit: tried to break it up, so it doesn't look like a huge fucking block of text

[Lindz]

In my first month at judo I was partnered with a nikyu for newaza randori. The tape on his fingers was coming off or something. I spent the whole round chasing him down and trying to crush him. He almost got it straightened out before the round was over.

[W. Rabbit]

Only a orange belt and two striped white belt.

Who cares?

You aren't a pussy.

They are just assholes.

Don't quit judo.

:qtank:

[Arskanator]

Who cares?

You aren't a pussy.

They are just assholes.

Don't quit judo.

:qtank:

^^^^^^
This.

[ADM]

Firstly, you're a white belt (like me, except I have a year on you) so relax, you're still learning.

Secondly these guys are black belts, surprise surprise, even in Judo, these guys can roll well on the ground ... but they're black belts, they trained hard to get there and clearly have the 'skills'.

Thirdly do these guys also have weight / strength on you? Take that into effect too.

If these guys are being douche bags, fuck them man, why even bother letting that get to you? There's a brown belt at my club who pretty much owns everyone, no one can touch this guy, I think I've managed to pull guard on him ONCE. And the only time I passed his guard was when he pretty much let me. I've rolled him MANY times. He's good, beyond good and he knows it.

But we get along well, he's not a douchebag about it.

So you're worried about your progress as a junior in these martial arts? Give it a few more years of solid training (not this once in a while bullshit) and let us know how you go. Believe it or not, people will still be better than you at this point, those who stop training remain shit.

[keke]

Thanks for the support, just wanna clarify I know they're good and I know they're better than me. WITHOUT A DOUBT in my mind, I know I won't tap them out, let alone do anything productive. It's just that when you look up to these guys and then they call you shit it kinda hurts, no matter how much of a pussy I sound like right now. It just feels like a lack of progress on my part, I feel like I'm missing something but I guess the old adage of train harder is there.

[Lindz]

Thanks for the support, just wanna clarify I know they're good and I know they're better than me. WITHOUT A DOUBT in my mind, I know I won't tap them out, let alone do anything productive. It's just that when you look up to these guys and then they call you shit it kinda hurts, no matter how much of a pussy I sound like right now. It just feels like a lack of progress on my part, I feel like I'm missing something but I guess the old adage of train harder is there.

Support? Oh no we've angered Crom.

STFU and HTFU noob

[W. Rabbit]

It just feels like a lack of progress on my part

Do you feel you would have performed the same against them if it had been your very first day?

Chew on that.

Lindz is right, only valor and death please Crom.

[BKR]

Clearly, you are a failure because you could not "tap" experienced black belts even though they basically gave you their backs.

Just keep training, and someday, if you persevere, you too can frustrate noobs.

Calling you disappointing was a bit over the top, though.

Ben

[Ignorami]

Sounds to me like they are looking to justify to themselves that they left.

They came back - why?
They went out of their way to put down a white belt that stayed - why?
Two guys you respected have turned into arseholes - why?

I'd guess things aren't going as well as they'd hoped.

[Prince Vlad]

They sound like a pair of wankers to me. A black belt versus a blue belt is no comparison. The browns and purples at the place I train at sometimes look bored when they are rolling against beginners but they generally allow them to try a few moves before escaping and fucking them over. They also tend to throw out the odd instruction like "you want to try getting your knee over here" etc - then they make it really difficult for you to do so, which is a great way of learning. There's one purple belt at the place I go to who is a complete prick though. He sits there looking bored, waits a minute or two while you embarrass yourself then throws on a really dangerous submission such as arm bar while kneeling on your jaw or neck. If you try anything serious attack he just punishes you badly, the last noob who jump over his guard ended up screaming for the tap while he knelt on hi eye socket (this fucker is also about 16 stone). I just avoid guys like him because I learn nothing from them and I don't like rolling with dickheads. I'm not a professional fighter, so besides a tough workout and bit of hard rolling I want to learn something and have fun for my money. Don't quit bjj/judo - just train harder and avoid rolling with idiots that have higher ranks.

[JudOWNED]

I think the verdict is, those guys are jerks.

Oddly enough, I just had the opposite experience. I rolled with a BJJ BB the other day. Not surprisingly, he toyed with me, and very methodically pulled me into his guard and manuevered me into a triangle. And I tapped. About what I expected when rolling with a BB. But after, the guy was full of praise! lol Said I was strong (which led to his biggest criticism of me, musceling), had a good base/posture and defended well. I said thanks, but inside my head I was thinking, "Whatever, buddy, I'm pretty sure I suck!" lol

[JudoA]

They sound like dicks. Everyone has to start as a newbie and work their way up, and yes you will make crappy mistakes and stuff along the way. I believe this is called learning :ninjadanc

[judoka_uk]

That black belt knows true Judo. Judo is about building your moral character and physicallity. He is using the ancient public school boy method of improving your moral character, by exposing and humilating you for anything that makes you pathetic. As a result you will strive to improve yourself and therefore not be pathetic anymore. Alternatively if you don't rise up to and strive to improve yourself then you have proved them right and you're pathetic.

Spoiler:

His comment was dickish if it was just that put down. If it was 'you're disappointing, because I know you're better than this and you made these mistakes which you know you shouldn't make etc...' it would have been ok.

[RumbleFish]

Did he give you a reason why you were disappointing?
Or offer any constructive criticism?

If not, he's just a dick.