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    Gym Stereotypes

    If you workout or ever have workout at a Gym, you've probably noticed particular stereotypical people working out in there. For example, you have your:

    Gunslinger - Typically a young thinly build newbie bodybuilder who selects execsivelly heavy weight for dumbell curls. His cheating makes him resemble a cowboy slinging out his guns.

    The Screamer - Male or Female, positive half of lift is usually accompanied by excessively loud and disturbing scream.

    Anyone have any more gym stereotypes?

    #2
    I'd love to add some insight.

    The Fixture - Someone who always seems to be there, no matter what time of day it is. The Fixture is normally in very good shape themselves and has good lifting form.

    The Preener - Someone who is sure to look at themselves in the full-size mirrors more than a few times per session, regardless of how fit they really are. Usually, they're in less than optimal shape.

    The Try-Hards - They're older, (a lot)fatter, weaker and obvious beginners. But I have to respect them for dragging their asses there in the first place.

    The Ego Lifters - These guys annoy the f*uck out of me. They also qualify as Gunslingers and/or Screamers, but the main thing with "Ego"s is that they lift a lot of weight. In fact, they always lift more than they can handle with decent form. But this helps to build up their ego, hence the name. IMO, they miss the whole point of weightlifting in the first place.

    The Cardio Queens - Now these are the stereotypical characters that I look forward to seeing. They also qualify as Fixtures, and they pretty much rule the treadmills or elliptical machines. If you're lucky, they're great looking as well as in shape and you can check them out on the way to the water fountain. But they can be a major distraction if they're over in the free weights section at the same time you are.

    The Powerlifters - Some of the rarest characters to see, but totally unmistakable. Look for large physiques with exceptionally huge guts. Usually older, balding white men with wrist straps, knee wraps and enormous leather powerlifting belts. However, they are entertaining to watch lift, due to the sheer power they exhibit in benching, squatting or deadlifting.

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      #3
      The Top Heavies - Young men that focus on their upper body so much to the detriment of their legs that they seem to defy the force of gravity by remaining upright.

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        #4
        two more types

        The Cockroach - a dude that is basically skinny i.e. 2% body fat with his little muscles pumped up and bulging. Spends all the time he in not in the gym out by the pool in the sun so that he turns brown as a piece of furniture. With the six pack abs and the ribs showing along with the color he looks like a roach that has been turned over on its back.

        The FatTub Dumpling - big fat asses that come to the gym. If they "workout" at all it is like 6 minutes walking on a treadmill then 2 hours soaking in the "Fat Tub" (hot tub) Their flabby arms and boobs look like Dumpling floating in broth.

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          #5
          Thats 11, I'm pretty sure there's more.

          The Mighty Metamorphers: Guys that go from having a reasonably ok physique to bulging ripped muscles in three months. On inquiry they claim they've been eating extra protein.
          Last edited by Adrian5; 2/23/2006 10:55am, .

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            #6
            The Accessory Guy - has every extra piece of equipment or garb that one could possibly justify taking into the gym along with logos on the shirt, pants, and shoes. Straps? Check. Chalk? Check. 2 gallon jug of water? Check. Giant bag to carry all this shit around? Check.



            But wait. Why do you need to carry all that crap around if your doing cardio and abs today? Plus, if I have to wait one more minute to use the piece of equipment I need because you're either:

            1. adjusting your straps
            2. straightining your hat
            3. messing with your iPod
            4. rolling up your sleeves so you can see your arms


            ...then I'm liable to rip your arm off and beat you with it until I feel some degree of satisfaction.



            ...




            But if I'm taking to long with a piece of equipment, STFU! I'm sure I have a good reason plus I'm just that important.

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              #7
              A sub-specie of Accessory guy would have to be 'belt guy' - a guy that wears a weight belt for every exercise he does. On conclusion of workout he will hang the belt over his shoulder in an impressive manner, strutting out of the gym.

              The Spit breather - Beware of spotting this one, particularly in Bench presses. The exaggerated out breaths are usually accompanied by a fine spray of saliva.

              The Shit Breather - Again beware in spotting this lest you blasted with a foul wind.

              A particularly worrisome stereotype is a combination of the above two.

              Avoid at all costs.
              Last edited by Adrian5; 2/23/2006 11:10am, .

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                #8
                The "Expert"= Usually a skinny punk who is weak and pathetic. However, he is more than willing to help you out on your form or give suggestions on how to get bigger and stronger, whether you want that help or not.

                The Slut = Any chick at a gym. Ok, that was a poor joke. Seriously, the groupie chick that is there to pick up any pro-lifter or bodybuilder.

                Kung Fu Guy = I've only seen this guy at one gym, however he is kind of built but has alot of fat. He does weird exercises with dumbells and never does a full rep of any kind. He does forms in a mirror to warm up, psych himself up for his lifts and generally to "impress" to everyone that he's a kung fu master.

                The worker = Guy who gets in, does the workout he wants and gets out. This guy is serious about his workout and isn't there to socialize or show off. He's often looked at by the other stereotypes as a strange person because he spends less than 30 minutes in the gym. They wonder how he got so big and/or strong when he spends so little time in the gym than they do.

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                  #9
                  The Basal Metabolic Rate Freak - rarely spotted, a very low metabolic rate allows them to workout in jeans, boots, and a jumper very comfortably.

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                    #10
                    The dirtbag - a scummy guy who stinks and wears nasty clothing that hasn't been washed in years. He usually has plenty of room to workout.

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                      #11
                      The Homo-lifter: Often hard to spot, usually on steroids, and places a particular emphasis on abs, remains lean year round, rarely choosing to bulk.

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                        #12
                        Old School MC Hammer Farignomaniac guy - This is the guy who is ripped like the freaks on the cover of Muscle and Fitness mag but always seem to wear the fashionabley loud and rediculous MC Hammer pants and the World Gym string tank top....uh oh..uh oh...uh oh, uh oh...uh oh...uh oh, here come's roid rage.

                        The American Idol wanna be - This is the guy looking at himself in the mirror while doing alternating dumbell curls with 10-15 lb dumbells and singing out loud to whatever fucking rubish he has playing on his MP3 player. Never seems to push himself too hard because he doesn't want to inappropriatley grunt through John Mayer's Your Body's a Wonderland.

                        I seriously almost pee'd myself laughing while trying to work out next to the latter guy, fucking priceless, yes he WAS singing John Mayer out loud to whoever would listen.

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                          #13
                          The Hero guy: Always looks for an opportunity to assisst females in moving heavy weights.

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                            #14
                            The Cell phone guy/gal:No matter what importance he puts into his/her training he/she can't seem to go 1 hour without that stupid phone.Because that next call just might be very important that they put down their weights to start gabbing on the phone.The conversation usually ends abruptly with a 'seeyah(there)'.Then he/she gets up and leaves right then and there.

                            Comes back the next day to continue the training left-off the day before only to stop in the middle to take another important phone call.
                            Last edited by CanucKyokushin; 2/23/2006 11:41am, .

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                              #15
                              Invisible Lats guy: Ok, this guy walk around with his arms and shoulders pushed out despite the absence of Lat muscles, and a pump in those muscles, usually triggerred by an unconscious association with looking tough and muscle men that have this physique. Not limited to the gym however, they can be spotted frequently elsewhere.

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