Looking for ex Jung SuWon / Tae Yun Kim students (Part 4)

[Shadow Dancer]

Just checking in to see who all is still around... especially during this pandemic.

[bemused]

Lighthouse still has a presence in Milpitas. Their flags were at half-mast today. Anyone know who died?

[bemused]

The International Cultic Studies Association has a series of videos on cults. Most are recordings of presentations at their conferences. I'm posting this one, "Marriage After the Cult," because this therapist covers everything Kimmie did to couples and families in the first five minutes. Some "original" she was.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ArZiuRPwCp4

[bemused]

Just an update - I'm still really enjoying training at my new school. After training for two months and learning the first three of their completely different forms (they do the palgue set), I will be testing for green belt soon. Menopause has been brutal on my health and weight, but now I'm successfully fighting back. I don't mind that it will take me a while to become a black belt again.

I have started sparring again, and I'm especially impressed by the lack of backstage drama, which is saying a lot for a school in which most of the students are in their teens and twenties. Everyone is supportive, not because they have to be or because they're trying to lure me into some inner circle, but because of simple common decency. And it helps that they're not sleep-deprived like the inner circle at JSW.

I learned a bit of interesting gossip. When I mentioned to the wife of the head of the school, also an advanced black belt, that my former master liked to "play God," she said, "I've had that teacher." The head of this school and his wife used to train under Byung Yu. Remember him? Byung Yu once left a message for Kimmie calling her "sweet cakes" or something like that. Turns out Byung Yu got in trouble for seducing a 13-year-old girl.

[Shadow Dancer]

Good for you! I took up boxing a couple of years ago and really enjoyed it.

[bemused]

I have started training at a new Tae Kwon Do school, and oh what a difference! Two observations will demonstrate it. One is that, despite being a former world champion, this teacher is content with the title "Mr." and doesn't demand to be called "Great Grandmaster Dr." In fact, when I mentioned that title to him, the expression on his face was priceless. The other is that I walked by the school when classes weren't in session and saw him by himself, vacuuming the floor. Great Grandmaster Dr. Tae Yun Kim would never do that unless 1) it was a photo opportunity, or 2) she was shaming the minion who was supposed to be doing it.

Speaking of minions, here's a limerick I came up with today:

Her Highness Great Doctor Grandmaster,
Was really a walking disaster:
It's just the opinion
Of one former minion,
But I couldn't run away faster.

[clarehoare]

I started this thread in 2005. I started it because when I googled "Tae Yun Kim cult" nothing came up. There were some vague usenet postings from the early 90s about opinion, but no substance.

I started a couple threads in other spots, in the years leading up to finding Bullshido and building this thread. None ever took off.

At first I was told by friends not to post. They were likewise perusing the internet looking for information, and found mine.. but when they figured out who the poster was, they were scared. Even this thread took several years to take off. But for the better it provided a forum for everyone who has utilized it to post their experiences and feelings.

It was a cathartic process for me to post, read, and research. I as many of you have gone through a lot. I don't even have the courage nor time to go back through the thousands of posts and read.

I am proud of you all. Many started by posting under pseudonyms as I did. Hiding their identity or posing as someone else, in order to not receive backlash. I lived under the assumption that Kim was the all knowing, well beyond my 3 year stint in the COL cult. But now, with the help of this thread I think there has become an open and frank discussion between us that happens, without the awkwardness it once had. We all have the same information. As well other people can find it now. They can be informed before they decide to devote their life to Tae Yun Kim and her (allegedly) nefarious organizations.

I wouldn't be who I am today without these experiences.. But that does not mean I owe her any debt of gratitude.

I thank you all for spending your time, and facing an at one time perceived risk by posting.. I hope that someday I can groom my thoughts on this subject into a more deliberate, concise, on point format.. but for now the 1000's of non-sequitur posts will have to do.

I still encourage everyone to share what they have. I will happily post public documents on my blog and share pertinent information.

I appreciate you all for participating in this project. It took years, but alas was a success.

I can't quantify how many people have been helped by this, but I'm sure it's a lot... in addition to all of those who have posted.

Thank you.

[Shadow Dancer]

Thank you Bemused!

[bemused]

Great post, Shadow. I feel much the same way. Healing takes time, but it's never too late to start. I'm happily married, well employed, and thriving among my friends, most of whom are fellow musicians.

[Shadow Dancer]

It has been a long time since I’ve posted here. On a lark, I recently re-read the entire saga from front to back, and look at where I am now in comparison to those years gone by.

To those of you in COL who may consider leaving, be assured that there is a good life waiting for you. You will go through some serious separation anxiety and then there are the stages of grief that will face you. But, ultimately you will pass through them and regain your sense of self, self-worth, happiness, and the ability to live a life on your own terms.

I’m not proud of the raw anger, snippiness, crassness and vicious meanness I spewed on this forum. It was over the top and childish. I’m sorry for that, but I do understand where it came from. It was like lancing an infected boil. It rose to the surface, erupted, drained, and then started to heal. Now it has healed and there is a scar to remember it by, but not be troubled with.

For what it is worth, Kyung-Ae, I forgive you. Probably that means nothing to you, but I want you to know that.

Angela, I forgave you years ago and hope you have a happy life. Scott, I hope you value her.

Bullshido provided a form of support-group therapy where we can/could come to let out our anger, shame, thoughts, and pain in a safe nurturing environment. To all of you here, I thank you for that.

This chapter of my life is finally over. I look forward to the future without the negative baggage I carried for years. Best wishes to all of you here and to those of you who may escape to start your journey back to freedom and happiness.

[bemused]

I haven't been on Bullshido in months. Thanks for the post, Clare. Interesting developments. Building an obstacle course isn't such a big deal, but any use of weapons is going to frighten the neighbors. Urban California is not rural Texas. What concerns me most, though, are the blogs of escapes. I'm reminded of Jdms's story. They might just be references to this thread and its predecessors, but maybe someone in the area witnessed an escapee heading for the freeway or something.

[clarehoare]

http://www.topix.com/forum/city/frem...TG690JRLJG3I98

The locals are getting restless... Unconfirmed reports of shooting in the area and a strange training ground.

[clarehoare]

Hey all... I noticed some videos, apparently from 3 years ago.. They were posted on another blog.. Links...

http://cultslayerus.wordpress.com/

Also an FYI, the videos are very boring and nonsensical.

[clarehoare]

Hey all... I noticed some videos, apparently from 3 years ago.. They were posted on another blog.. Links...

http://cultslayerus.wordpress.com/

[Failed Student]

Excellent points Bemused.

One must also look at the type of person who becomes a victim....those with low self-esteem, those with little or no family structure or support system seem to be the most vulnerable, along with a few innocents who think they are part of a greater plan.

In my own experience with this group, it started out innocently enough...a few favors were asked, and as acquiescence was gained, the requests became demands, then orders. As the leader saw she was gaining control over her followers, she became drunk with power. So yes, abuse tends to escalate.

I think back and wonder whether this situation could have been short circuited while still in its infancy in VT. The power of persuasion, coupled with the student enforcers of the leader, and people fell obediently into line. Still, there were many that saw the cult for what it was, dropped out and went back to their lives, but those that stayed and are still there have been "turned". Their mental wiring has been changed, and they no doubt will live happily in this delusional environment until the end.

I did recover and have no feelings about this cult experience anymore. My life is full - with work, with play, and with friends and family.