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The Chi Machine (seriously, it exists)

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    The Chi Machine (seriously, it exists)

    The chi machine people! Something every martial artist should have! I saw this on soem crappy german teleshop ad. Basically they claim it focuses the body's 'chi energy' to tone up your buffed, bad self while you lie down and relax. You lie down, put your feet on it and it wiggles them about! For ages!
    Think of what such a device could do for martial artists! Beofre I had the chi machine, I could only levitate one side of the body and kept hitting my head on the floor, and my I couldn't get my fireballs to travel more than six feet.
    If we all had chi machines, we could fly around and blast stuff randomly with our laser vision and kill people by poking them!

    BUYITNOW!


    How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb?

    > Two. One to change it, and one not to change it.

    #2
    WHERE WHERE?!?


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      #3
      I invented that machine.

      Comment


        #4
        I saw that crap on TV here the other day. Golf Alpha Yankee.

        Chi Machine

        Sifu Emin - Did you see that?
        Me - (gasping) No, but I can't breathe yet.

        Comment


          #5
          Wow all I need is that and that damn pasta drainer pot. and my collection of stupid shit to be found on tv will be done for now.

          "You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans."-George Carlin

          Comment


            #6
            " Beofre I had the chi machine, I could only levitate one side of the body and kept hitting my head on the floor, and my I couldn't get my fireballs to travel more than six feet."

            LOL!

            --A poor band player I was, but now I am crocodile king. --
            Click To Get My Free Training Newsletter... Do It NOW!


            "You all just got fucking owned.";
            "TaeBo_Master and GajusCaesar just scored 10,000,000 points on all you pawns."

            - The Wastrel

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              #7
              Actually, my instructor acttually has one of those. The lady he bought the house from left it there. It actually is kind of nice. It relaxes the your whole body it gives you a wierd tingling feeling. Then you can throw fire balls.
              And that's when I figured out that tears couldn't make somebody who was dead alive again. There's another thing to learn about tears, they can't make somebody who doesn't love you any more love you again. It's the same with prayers. I wonder how much of their lives people waste crying and praying to God. If you ask me, the devil makes more sense than God does. I can at least see why people would want him around. It's good to have somebody to blame for the bad stuff they do. Maybe God's there because people get scared of all the bad stuff they do. They figure that God and the Devil are always playing this game of tug-of-war game with them. And they never know which side they're gonna wind up on. I guess that tug-of-war idea explains how sometimes, even when people try to do something good, it still turns out bad.

              Comment


                #8
                Are you Mercurius?


                How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb?

                > Two. One to change it, and one not to change it.

                Comment


                  #9
                  never mind,forget that.


                  How many Zen masters does it take to change a light bulb?

                  > Two. One to change it, and one not to change it.

                  Comment


                    #10
                    I think I just heard Wastrels head explode.

                    --------
                    El Guapo says, ""You can buy muscles, but you can't buy COJONES!"
                    --------
                    The Wastrel - So attractive he HAS to be a woman.
                    - Pizdoff

                    Comment


                      #11
                      http://www.orgone.org/requipment/oracs/orgonacc00.htm

                      yup, they do exist

                      Comment


                        #12
                        http://search.store.yahoo.com/cgi-bin/nsearch?follow-pro=1&vwcatalog=toolsforwellnesscom&catalo g=toolsforwellnesscom&query=orgone&catalog =toolsforwellnesscom&basket=%28null%29&et= 38d07bab&unique=28385ea9

                        other ones

                        Comment


                          #13
                          http://search.store.yahoo.com/cgi-bin/nsearch?follow-pro=1&vwcatalog=toolsforwellnesscom&catalo g=toolsforwellnesscom&query=orgone&catalog =toolsforwellnesscom&basket=%28null%29&et= 38d07bab&unique=28385ea9

                          other ones

                          Comment


                            #14
                            "Wow all I need is that and that damn pasta drainer pot. and my collection of stupid shit to be found on tv will be done for now."

                            Actually them pasta pans are really good :).


                            'AVE IT

                            Comment


                              #15
                              lol well it works but draining pasta was never hard before. But the guy on the commerical seem'ed to have trouble.

                              "You know the good part about all those executions in Texas? Fewer Texans."-George Carlin

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