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Pax Baculum -- Still the Best

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    Pax Baculum -- Still the Best

    This was posted by that weeine Tourist, who feels the need to mention how butch and biker-y he is like teenage boys need to mention how many chicks they've scored with.

    In a thread RE: improvised weapons

    I agree with using your boots. If I could only choose one, I would choose my Harley boots over a knife. Then again, there is sharp metal on my Harley boots that is more dnagerous than a knife.
    Come to think if it, my Harley boots are the most beautiful thing in the world. Except my Harley. Harley. Fapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfapfap.


    Don't forget items that have have weight for blunt trauma. Most furniture is good, and keeps the aggressor at bay; if he can't hit you, he cannot hurt you, and basically his black belt holds up his pants.
    He's totally right. Heavy objects make great weapons. Last week a Black Guy was staring at one of OUR women and I hit him with a gravel pit.

    And the black belt diss? What the hell?

    I also like coffee pots. If you get attacked in a diner, smack your opponent with a glass coffee pot, either the black rimmed one or the orange rimmed one will do. Nothing stops a guy faster than shards of glass in burning blisters.
    The average PB member will spend time pondering the following questions:

    What if I get attacked in a diner? What if I can't get to my three guns and 12 knives? Can either color coffee pot be used?

    Tourist is here to help.

    An aggressor knows pool cues are good for hitting. Fool him, poke him in a soft spot.
    Or eviscerate him with withering rhetoric. That hurts too.

    (The information offered here is for recreational purposes only, and does not reflect the editorial policy of The Retired Motorcyclists of America or the Southwest Agave Cactus Producers. Although the thought of some caffeine burnt townie with blue chalk on the front of his Dockers after being jammed in the 'nads does invoke a humorous image.)
    I beat up college boys. Hyuk hyuk hyuk hyuk.
    I dork harder than any of you can imagine.

    - Hedgehoney

    #2
    I made one post on that forum. it was in a thread entitled "The Hypocrisy Of Michael Moore". In it, Phil called Michael Moore "torpid". I posted and said that you could hardly describe Michael Moore as being in any way "apathetic" (for this is the meaning of torpid). Phil replied that he meant that he was big and fat, "like jabba the hut".

    ..

    I declined to comment. But Christ, I was tempted.

    Comment


      #3
      I really hate the Tourist.
      The sad irony is that I am wearing Harley boots right now. Perhaps I should go see him and "improvise?"

      Seriously, if there is one PB member I would love to throwdown with, it'd be that guy. Mostly becasue I am friends with a TON of bikers, and he is exactly the type of guy they all HATE.
      And lo, Kano looked down upon the field and saw the multitudes. Amongst them were the disciples of Uesheba who were greatly vexed at his sayings. And Kano spake: "Do not be concerned with the mote in thy neighbor's eye, when verily thou hast a massive stick in thine ass".

      --Scrolls of Bujutsu: Chapter 5 vs 10-14.

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        #4
        If you have time to get to a coffee pot during a fight, then you must be fighting crippled 5-year-olds.

        PL

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          #5
          My father-in-law is an old-school, ex-Vietnam vet Biker. I've never once heard him try and talk about how tough he is, much less in relation to anything to do with being a biker or bike culture.

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            #6
            But he did talk about how it's important to always be thinking about quick access to the coffee pots when you go to the diner, right?
            Lone Wolf McQuade Final Fight: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VmrDe_mYUXg

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              #7
              Why am I suddenly reminded of:

              Dupea: Yeah. Now all you have to do is hold the chicken, bring me the toast, give me a check for the chicken salad sandwich, and you haven't broken any rules.
              Waitress (spitefully): You want me to hold the chicken, huh?
              Dupea: I want you to hold it between your knees.

              cue - PE grabs the orange coffee pot and slays everyone heroically
              Last edited by Chronomorte; 1/28/2005 4:03pm, .
              It's hard to fight when you're in a gazebo -- Mitch Hedberg

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                #8
                There is a great quote from a Harley Davidson Executive in "Results Based Leadership" (I'm sure you all subscribe).

                "What we sell is the ability for a 43 year old accountant to dress in black leather, ride through small towns and have people be afraid of him."

                That pretty much sums up the bullshido quotient.
                The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposing ideas in mind at the same time and still retain the ability to function.
                ~F. Scott Fitzgerald

                Whether it is a good thing or a bad thing, smashing things up is sometimes very pleasant.
                ~Fyodor Dostoyevsky

                Comment


                  #9
                  Originally posted by Scrapper
                  I really hate the Tourist.
                  The sad irony is that I am wearing Harley boots right now. Perhaps I should go see him and "improvise?"

                  Seriously, if there is one PB member I would love to throwdown with, it'd be that guy. Mostly becasue I am friends with a TON of bikers, and he is exactly the type of guy they all HATE.
                  He's begging for a trolling.
                  I dork harder than any of you can imagine.

                  - Hedgehoney

                  Comment


                    #10
                    I still say this is the wannabe phemomenon. Whether your talking RBSD, TMA, yuppie Harley riders, volunteer firefighters, aux police, Civil Air Patrol. Mostly harmless geeks. Sometimes they even do something positive, but mostly they just play pretend.

                    Didn't every neighborhood have one of the geeks with a scanner in their ear trying to direct traffic around the car accident or house fire? Mine sure did. Maybe it's just a Bawlmer (Baltimore) thing...

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                      #11
                      Fuck em all. I made one post, describing the British attitude to guns and the reasoning behind it, and the fuckers deleted it within minutes.
                      Amusingly, I'm not actually anti-gun for americans.
                      I just don't think they can handle dry sarcasm well.
                      Taking responsibility for my actions since 1989

                      Comment


                        #12
                        Oh, of course, the idea that British people might have an opinion about British law isn't objectivist, Sam. Besides, British people can't do nuttin in the street - they ain't got no eyebrows or glasses.

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                          #13
                          This strangely reminds me of the time that one of the people here suggested blinding attackers with table salt.
                          Rad ki was made up by adolescents. I do not know who created trad ki but it was not made by adolescents. your an ass dude, Im not being a little bitch you are, your past the level of a bitch. Your beyond Bitch! If im easting my time with ki and psi, then your wasting time to prove frauds, and all shit like that! -theoutsider

                          Kick boxing is ok, but don't expect do beat a man like Rickson Gracie with that. You need a real martial art. You need Xing Yi Quan. -Emptyflower

                          The splits, how ever, have a few martial uses. Doing the splits for me, can put my fists in testical strike range.

                          dont ignore the Art for the Martial or else your just kick boxing

                          Yes i am serious, there are kicks that can block punches. we have them in Moo duk kwan.
                          I want to learn how to use them in case my arm gets broken in a fight.
                          what would you have me do? if my arm gets broke, not block punches? -sempi-stone

                          Comment


                            #14
                            Originally posted by Onny
                            I made one post on that forum. it was in a thread entitled "The Hypocrisy Of Michael Moore". In it, Phil called Michael Moore "torpid". I posted and said that you could hardly describe Michael Moore as being in any way "apathetic" (for this is the meaning of torpid). Phil replied that he meant that he was big and fat, "like jabba the hut".

                            ..

                            I declined to comment. But Christ, I was tempted.
                            You were both wrong. Sorry.

                            Still at least you're not a fat hypocrite.
                            Definition

                            torpid [Show phonetics]
                            adjective FORMAL
                            not active; moving or thinking slowly, especially as a result of being lazy or feeling like you want to sleep:

                            Originally posted by Stickx
                            It must suck for legit practitioners of tai chi like Cullion to see their art get all watered down into exercise for seniors.
                            Those who esteme qi have no strength. ~ Exposition of Insights into the Thirteen Postures Attrib: Wu Yuxiang founder of Wu style tai chi.

                            Comment


                              #15
                              I would like to note how amused I am by the specification that both the orange and black rimmed coffee pots will do. This implies extensive testing in breaking both colors over people's heads to see if the same results are produced.

                              "Day 6: The color of the plastic between the spectrum of black and orange has had little effect on the results. However, yellow rimmed pots of hot coffee has caused a significant amount of subjects to report feeling "refreshed" and "invigorated" by the experience. Further study is required."

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