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10 commandments of school searching

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  • jkdbuck76
    replied
    That's right, Deamo. Skip the crap and show me how it works. I said that to a McDojo instructor and he said "that's the Western way of thinking". I couldn't help but laugh.

    If more people wanted clarity, you wouldn't have all the mumbo jumbo that's out there.

    Leave a comment:


  • Deamo_Nangel
    replied
    Originally posted by CrimsonTiger
    I disagree with this. Knowing how to count to 10, basic terminology and the mentality behind any art are important. Some of them are simpler than others, granted, and you don't need to know everything about every art. However, if you chose to study an art, then study it's history too. Imagine boxing without knowing who Ali was?

    Knowing your basic terminology also helps in understanding a technique when discussing it with another person from another art...if we all just gave them our own names, we'd all be saying the same thing in different ways. Wastes time.

    I think we need to add this:

    "As an instructor, thou shalt be able to see thy toes (unless thou art pregnant, in which case WHY ARE YOU TRAINING?!) and be able to get up from a seated position without going 'ooooooomf!' In other words, teachers can't be lazy fat-asses!"
    Ok I will agree with you on the language to a point, but I really see no reason why I need some fat white christian guy teaching me zen budhism, or having me memorize the extensive history of their art form's lineage, a basic over view is reasonable, but I really don't think I need to know any more than that.

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  • jkdbuck76
    replied
    Thou shalt allow reputable visiting instructors from other arts to attend and to teacheth thy classes every once in a while.

    Thou shalt not consider thyself a kali expert simply because thou knowest sumbrada and siniwalli. Neither shalt thou incorporate said drills in thy class and call it a "weapons program."

    Leave a comment:


  • CrimsonTiger
    replied
    Originally posted by Deamo_Nangel
    Thou shall not require that I learn the language, extensive history, or philosophy that surrounds thy art. Counting to ten in korean, zen buddism & knowing that this lineage is the pure shit, has no relevence to self defence or learning how to fight
    I disagree with this. Knowing how to count to 10, basic terminology and the mentality behind any art are important. Some of them are simpler than others, granted, and you don't need to know everything about every art. However, if you chose to study an art, then study it's history too. Imagine boxing without knowing who Ali was?

    Knowing your basic terminology also helps in understanding a technique when discussing it with another person from another art...if we all just gave them our own names, we'd all be saying the same thing in different ways. Wastes time.

    I think we need to add this:

    "As an instructor, thou shalt be able to see thy toes (unless thou art pregnant, in which case WHY ARE YOU TRAINING?!) and be able to get up from a seated position without going 'ooooooomf!' In other words, teachers can't be lazy fat-asses!"

    Leave a comment:


  • Miguksaram
    replied
    Originally posted by cricket
    I am curious, Is any of this based on fact? or are you just kidding around.

    I haven't shopped many schools so I have no idea what is out there.
    Both. It is based on a lot of crap that is out there. I am just trying to find a bit of humor in the sadness that is in the martial arts world.

    Leave a comment:


  • Deamo_Nangel
    replied
    Thou shall not require that I learn the language, extensive history, or philosophy that surrounds thy art. Counting to ten in korean, zen buddism & knowing that this lineage is the pure shit, has no relevence to self defence or learning how to fight

    Leave a comment:


  • jkdbuck76
    replied
    No Traditional Tom,
    the funniest part of the Bible is when Elijah is going up against the prophets of Baal. Elijah taunts them and in some translations, he says something much akin to "Where is your god Baal? Is he on the toilet?" Now THAT'S funny.

    Did we cover "Thou shalt not make me sign a contract?"

    Leave a comment:


  • Senshi
    replied
    Re: 10 commandments of school searching

    Originally posted by miguksaram
    9)Thou shalt not falsely accuse your art as some 3,000 year old mystic decendant from aliens. I have Google and I will use it.
    9a)Thou shall not claim that your art is the most deadly known to man and has techniques forbidden to be taught.

    Leave a comment:


  • Traditional Tom
    replied
    lol nice, I like this thread, it takes the funniest parts of the bible (the commandments) and mixes it with the dissing of mcdojos... very nice!

    Leave a comment:


  • cricket
    replied
    I am curious, Is any of this based on fact? or are you just kidding around.

    I haven't shopped many schools so I have no idea what is out there.

    Leave a comment:


  • Emevas
    replied
    Sorry, I got caught up on the whole "go forth and multiply" thing that I completely forgot about spreading the word...

    Leave a comment:


  • Miguksaram
    replied
    Originally posted by Emevas
    Now we're talkin'! Praise the lord, for he has shown me the way! I once was lost, but now am found, but am still fuckin' blind from that stupid right cross to my eye!
    Now go and mulitply spread thy word amongst the forsaken. Travel deep into the bowels of the TKD schools so thy word can be heard by the damned.

    Leave a comment:


  • Emevas
    replied
    Originally posted by miguksaram
    Perhaps I shall apply ammendments to the commandments:

    7)Thou shalt teach me effective techniques. I'm all for cool looking stuff (because chicks dig the cool moves) but I need to know that when Bubba comes a callin' I can effectively get myself out of the situation with minimal bodily damage.

    7a) Thou shall have sparring. Not the throw a punch and I will do a block and cool counter move, but actual moving around punching kicking and beating the snot out of each other to learn what works and doesn't. Being taught effective techniques is one thing...being taught how to use effective techniques in real time is another.

    Now we're talkin'! Praise the lord, for he has shown me the way! I once was lost, but now am found, but am still fuckin' blind from that stupid right cross to my eye!

    Leave a comment:


  • jkdbuck76
    replied
    Thou shalt train with thy students.

    Thou shalt not stop teaching class to talk to a prospective student inasmuch as thou shalt have fliers with thy business hours and fee structure. Remember, to stop teaching thy paying students in order that thou mightest talk to someone who doth not pay or is simply bored showeth a total disregard for thy paying students.

    No one careth how many associations thou belongest to, how many trophies thou hast won (or purchased like Frank Dux), how much thou talketh with the Grandmaster.

    Leave a comment:


  • jkdbuck76
    replied
    Thou shalt not claim that thy Martial Art is 2,000 years old because there are paintings on a cave wall.

    Neither shalt thou promote thyself to higher degrees of black belt when thou stepest from the airplane.

    Thou shalt not quote Bruce Lee, David Carradine, or Yoda whenever thou art explaining something.

    If thou shalt use technical terminology, thou shalt pronounceth it correctly (whenever something is not important, it is "irrelevant" not "irrevuhlent".

    Leave a comment:

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