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Budd
1/05/2004 6:29pm,
I've decided to start my own martial arts system and organization.

The martial art is known as: Mianju Do.

The history is this: Centuries ago, an Indian prince fled to China seeking sanctuary and while there taught fighting techniques to some of the Hao Y'aduin priests (they weren't as famous as the Shaolin because they didn't have a PR guy). Unfortunately, Hao Y'aduin Temple tragically exploded when a previously unknown pocket of natural gas was ignited due to an acolyte's experimentations with flatulence and what is known today as Chi projection.

Fortunately, one of the priests escaped and settled in Okinawa, where he taught his descendents the family art, as well as adapting the arts taught to the general population into his own curriculum. The last of his descendants travelled to what is now known as Japan and inadvertantly became responsible for starting several ninja clans due to his odd sense of humor. He was accepted into service of the house of Totaitawabuttitat, a feudal lordship where his line served for at least a generation.

The Totaitawabuttitat House was destroyed by the feline deceptiveness of another clan, yet the line from the original Hao Y'aduin temple continued when a refugee escaped to a small fishing villiage in what is now known as North Korea. There, he was able to secretly learn the sun source of martial arts from a house of assassins, by pretending to entertain them with melodramatic utterances, which have since become known as Ung poetry.

Mianju Do Today: I had the privilege of being the first Westerner to learn this comprehensive martial art from Grandmaster Hao Dee Duidi, who emigrated from North Korea shortly before it came under communist rule.

During the 1990s, I've been competing in secret death matches throughout the world. The Gracies may remember me as I used to compete under the nom de guerre El Mierda in South America. I've since decided to share Mianju Do with the world and have inherited the full system from Grandmaster Hao Dee Duidi, who died last fall, leaving no surviving relatives.

Our Mission: Anyone that wishes to become my e-student must send me their credit card number. The amount charged to it will be dependent upon how much I telepathically transmit to you in your dreams. If you are unable to receive the transmission, then your credit card will still be billed. The lessons are available, for a fee, for retransmission.

If you wish to become a Mianju Do acolyte, then you must send a (possibly) one-time payment of $10,000. All your pre-existing ranks will be re-certified by my at that time. You will also have the opportunity to assign yourself a rank suitable to your new station. For each new acolyte and e-student you recruit, you will receive credit towards future transmissions.

That is all for now. Go forth and spread the teachings of Hao Dee Duidi of Hao Y'aduin. Together, we can make the world a better place for Mianju . . . . . Do.

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Sorry, I've been seeing so much Bullshido lately, I had to get that out of my system.

FingerorMoon?
1/05/2004 6:48pm,
You have a lot of time on your hands.

Dochter
1/05/2004 6:52pm,
Visa 4789 5864 2374 1783

exp date. 07/08

FingerorMoon?
1/05/2004 6:55pm,
Hey thats my card!

Budd
1/05/2004 6:57pm,
Excellent. It has begun.

WingChun Lawyer
1/05/2004 7:09pm,
"El Mierda", in south american, means Though Man. Go on, start calling your spanish neighbours that and watch the happy look on their faces.

ClintEQ
1/05/2004 9:05pm,
The ****. oh yeah.

PizDoff
1/05/2004 9:24pm,
Wait, marijuana-do?

Budd
1/05/2004 9:34pm,
Originally posted by PizDoff
Wait, marijuana-do?

Not quite, although it does constitute one of the sub-disciplines, which is often paired with the culinary section of the curriculum.

Hannibal
1/05/2004 10:02pm,
here we go again.

Black_Rose
1/05/2004 10:36pm,
I will join the force, only and if ONLY i get to wear a pink tutu and ride on the back of Magical dragon while a write my famous novel 'Why i like to hoses down my pants'. If the following conditions are allowed, i will be more than happy to join you! <Runs out the house claiming to be the sacred moose of secret society called 'Arahyt'>

The_Dude73
1/06/2004 7:09am,
The sad thing is, I'll bet there would be enough people that would buy this story to where you could have classes.

X_plosion
1/06/2004 7:51am,
Is there an extra charge if I want to be an astral spy? :)

Ronin
1/06/2004 8:24am,
Nice lineage and just as verifiable as many other systems out there and probably just as legit.
I have but one humble question:
Do you wear Hakamas ?

Budd
1/06/2004 8:55am,
Hmm . . . I haven't standardized a uniform yet, I'm leaning against hakamas for the h2h portion, but for weapons practice, it might not be a bad idea to implement, since hakamas do help teach proper hip movement and power generation. GM Hao always said the reason hakamas became popular in feudal Japan was because a famous swordsman lost a bet that he made while drinking too much sake. As a result, the swordsman had to wear a skirt for a whole year -- the sly devil then of course made it out to be like it was his intention the entire time to wear one and . . . hence, all the fashionable warriors had to wear hakamas.

yanewbs
1/06/2004 9:10am,
I bet you cut and pasted that from a legit site on the internet!! shame on you - come up with something original now :-)