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Squerlli
11/24/2008 9:34pm,
Long story short I need you to tell me if what I wrote is accurate, gauge it's readability, etc... just give me a quick edit check.

***

Muay Thai is the national sport of Thailand. Also known as 'the art of eight limbs' it is a combat sport fought in a boxing ring where combatants are allowed to use a variety of punch, kick, knee, and elbow strikes to fight their opponent. Muay means 'boxing' but not in the western sense, in Thai boxing refers to a much broader form of combat. Muay Thai sprang forth from a much older art called Muay Boran which is dated back to being over 2000 years old.

Muay Boran means old boxing or ancient boxing and was typically only used by soldiers in the Royal Thai army up until the 1920's. During era's where war was more common soldiers would spar and fight to keep their skills sharp during times of peace. The first form of organized competition was between the strongest boxers of the army, whom would fight in front of the king. Old competition rules were very scarce and the only protection fighters had were hand wraps made of hardened rope.

Death was about as common as a knock out and during the 1920's after witnessing the death of a boxer the King of Thailand abolished Muay Boran competition fighting. In turn Muay Thai was created. Western style boxing gloves, times rounds, and referee's were all introduced and it was made a sport anyone could compete in. Thailand is not one of the richest country's in the world and to escape poverty many young men and women join Thai boxing gyms to escape poverty and fight for cash prizes. Children fight as early as 6 years old.

In Thailand there is no armature rule set so all forms of competition are done with just gloves, shorts, and all strikes allowed regardless of age. Because of such an early starting age most fighters retire and go on to take more regular jobs around their early to mid twenties. Muay Thai is widely popular around the world as well. Countries with modern Thai boxing champions include Australia, Canada, Holland, France, Scotland and many other nations.

In America Muay Thai is still having lots of problems becoming approved by the national sports commission mostly due to its use of knee and elbow strikes. While a very brutal and punishing sport Muay Thai still has a great aspect of beauty and cultural significance to it.

A pre-fight ritual called the 'Wai Kru Ram Muay' which roughly translates to 'boxer paying respect to teachers'. Starting from the entrance of the ring the fighter will bow their head and then go inside the ring where they will prey with their coach for luck. After that the fighter will pay respect to each corner of the ring. Before the match officially starts a ceremonial dance will begin in which both opponents start from the center of the ring, kneel, and begin a pre-fight dance as to pay tribute to their parents, coaches, and whomever else they hold dear. This also works as a quick warm up before the fight begins.

***

Thoughts?

It's for school btw.

Kentucky Fried Chokin
11/24/2008 9:39pm,
You're writing book reports on Muay Thai?

Rivington
11/24/2008 9:39pm,
How does one do strikethroughs on this board?

MrBadGuy
11/24/2008 9:52pm,
Not like this

Rivington
11/24/2008 9:53pm,
Shucks.

Is it this instead?

Rivington
11/24/2008 10:00pm,
Pay attention to the bold and the strikes.


Muay Thai is the national sport of Thailand. Also known as "the art of eight limbs", it Muay Thai or Thai boxing is a combat sport fought in a boxing ring. where Combatants are allowed to use a variety of punches, kicks, and knee, and elbow strikes to [DESCRIBE HOW ONE WINS]. Muay means 'boxing' but not in the western sense, in Thai boxing refers to a much broader form of combat. Muay Thai sprang forth from a much older art called Muay Boran which is datesd back to being over 2000 years old. While a very brutal and punishing sport Muay Thai still has a great aspects of beauty and cultural significance to it.

This is what your first graf should look like, more or less. (It's B- student work, not D+ work now.)

Fix the rest based on this.

Also, pay better attention in class.

Squerlli
11/24/2008 10:25pm,
Rivington you're the fucking man. <3

Historically speaking did I basically nail everything major on the button?

P.S. Anyone gotta topic I should use to make a closing statement with? Something interesting or maybe just list some sites where one can find more info about the moo tie?

Rivington
11/24/2008 10:29pm,
P.S. Anyone gotta topic I should use to make a closing statement with? Something interesting or maybe just list some sites where one can find more info about the moo tie?

Your closing statement needs to refer to your thesis statement (the cultural beauty thing).

Vorpal
11/24/2008 11:07pm,
It's a bit dry. It reads like a wikipedia entry. If that's what the teacher is looking for that's fine. But dammit, you're training Muay Thai. You can throw in all the stuff you have there but why don't you write about how it feels to take a crapload of roundhouses to your thighs or how good it feels to kick someone in the head? How does the gym smell, who's in it, what do you think about when you're wrpping your hands before a bout, what is your instructor like, is he a badass, how do you know? Make it real, put the reader in the gym and make them care about what's going on.

thaclient
11/24/2008 11:09pm,
You also might want to throw some citations in there (assuming your prof. wants that sort of thing).

Matt Phillips
11/24/2008 11:11pm,
I would be a lot less annoyed with this if you had asked for some input or information, rather than posted your homework for me to correct.

cyril
11/24/2008 11:14pm,
You didn't talk about the banging of chicks or the deadly lineage passed down from the kings of Heaven

F

MrBadGuy
11/24/2008 11:24pm,
WHERE IS HANUMAN PRESENTS RING

Lily
11/24/2008 11:41pm,
Squerlli - definitely go with Vorpal's suggestion, its as easy as sliding a few sentences (maybe in italics to differentiate) between each paragraph (so there's two stories, one fact and one an MT'ers insight/experience) in the one piece. Oh, and everything Rivington said.

Spell check and edit it as well ('pray' not 'prey' etc.)

What subject is this for?

Rivington
11/24/2008 11:52pm,
It's a bit dry. It reads like a wikipedia entry. If that's what the teacher is looking for that's fine. But dammit, you're training Muay Thai. You can throw in all the stuff you have there but why don't you write about how it feels to take a crapload of roundhouses to your thighs or how good it feels to kick someone in the head? How does the gym smell, who's in it, what do you think about when you're wrpping your hands before a bout, what is your instructor like, is he a badass, how do you know? Make it real, put the reader in the gym and make them care about what's going on.

This advice is only good if the assignment calls for it.

If not, the OP will KTFO himself.

If it's a simple composition theme, one should stick with academic writing.

Matt Phillips
11/24/2008 11:54pm,
This advice is only good if the assignment calls for it.

If not, the OP will KTFO himself.

If it's a simple composition theme, one should stick with academic writing.

Off topic: you're the dude who trains martial application push hands in Boston right?