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View Full Version : The best compliment ever still sucks: I am like Fedor.



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Tenebrous
10/27/2008 6:59pm,
I was in jiujitsu and I received the best compliment ever. Someone I rolled with a couple of times, and I think I did a pretty good job, told me I was Fedor-like. I imagined myself marching down a ramp to a ring, to The Hymn of the Russian Federation. In my head I was already mercilessly crushing giant foreign devils with looping punches and sick armbars. I said, "Really? Cool, thanks."

He clarified, "Yeah, you're way stronger than you look."

I was a little confused. But still, I'm Fedor strong? I could manhandle people with pituitary issues with my might? Wait, is he just saying I just look wimpy? He attempts to sweep away the look of confusion that has come over me. He continues, "Well, you don't have definition, but you're still really strong. Like Fedor."



What he means, dear readers, is that I'm chubby. I guess we have the one thing in common, and I should be satisfied with that. I am a chubby ****, like Fedor.

Which way to the nearest weightwatchers?

Kentucky Fried Chokin
10/27/2008 7:01pm,
It's ok, we understand. More cheesey puffs?

3moose1
10/27/2008 7:07pm,
Its ok to be fat. Or skinny, as long as you kick ass.

****, man, i rolled this 13 year old last week, small fucker, too, but his technique was sick. He has been training for like, two years, and well, he didn't sub me, and i got him in an armbar, but he wasn't tapping so i let go (he seemed a little egotistical).

We were about even on technique, with him having the edge, but i was able to muscle through most everything, wiff my own technique knowledge.


One time we stood up, and i need to work on my guard, so i just pulled guard, and BAM, homeboy stuck a knee through on the way down, and papa moosey doesn't wear a cup in training because **** gets mis-aligned too easily and when you go for an armbar and your cup is just a little to the left, **** that **** hurts.

Anyway, goes to show you, don't underestimate anyone...

Tenebrous
10/27/2008 7:07pm,
It's ok, we understand. More cheesey puffs?

I like to fix my problems with pie.

CoffeeFan
10/27/2008 7:30pm,
hmmm... you didn't seem chubby at the throwdown.

Kid Miracleman
10/27/2008 7:37pm,
One time we stood up, and i need to work on my guard, so i just pulled guard, and BAM, homeboy stuck a knee through on the way down, and papa moosey doesn't wear a cup in training because **** gets mis-aligned too easily and when you go for an armbar and your cup is just a little to the left, **** that **** hurts.I think you just need a better-fitting cup.

Perhaps an Extra Small?

3moose1
10/27/2008 7:40pm,
I think you just need a better-fitting cup.

Perhaps an Extra Small?



Touche.


I just generally hate cups.

Tenebrous
10/27/2008 7:41pm,
hmmm... you didn't seem chubby at the throwdown.

Thank you sweety. Your check is in the mail. :love4:

theotherserge
10/27/2008 7:49pm,
I wonder what the hell people mean when they say "you don't look that strong" Like am I supposed to pop-out of a cake with my abs oiled like a Chippendale's dancer?

Functional strength and natural strength are almost totally unrecognizable to most people.

syberia
10/27/2008 7:53pm,
I just generally hate cups.

Only one of the guys at my dojo wears cup on a regular basis. (not that i'm doing cup checks...) The rest say somthing similar, they get misaligned or some ****.


He clarified, "Yeah, you're way stronger than you look."...

What he means, dear readers, is that I'm chubby. I guess we have the one thing in common, and I should be satisfied with that. I am a chubby ****, like Fedor.


Someone said that to me a few weeks ago in class... Not the fedor bit. I never thought about it this way. But, you have a point. Now i'm depressed and am off to eat cake before training.

Hesperus
10/27/2008 8:06pm,
I'm just sayin', save for the 6'6" guy I couldn't stop sidekicking out of sheer terror (or I was just tired of his shin paying my liver a visit) I've never been complimented on my power or strength. I assume "You're just as weak as you look, lanky-boy" is just implied.

Kid Miracleman
10/27/2008 8:07pm,
I just generally hate cups.Tell that to your necrotic left ball in a few years.

I always use a Windy (TM) steel cup; I wear Under Armour (TM) compression shorts with an Under Armour (TM) jock over that, which has a pouch for holding my cup. Everything stays nice and secure.

Windy (TM) and Under Armour (TM)... when it comes to protecting your balls, accept no substitutes!

Holy Moment
10/27/2008 8:43pm,
Someone once told me that I was Bill Duff-like. Pissed off, I punched the guy so hard in the small of his back that he shat himself.

Kid Miracleman
10/27/2008 8:50pm,
Someone once told me that I was Lorenzo Lamas-like. Pissed off, I whipped the guy's nuts with a car antenna and subsequently kicked him repeatedly in the stomach until there was blood in his stool. Afterward, I grabbed his wife's boobies.

theotherserge
10/27/2008 8:53pm,
what other possible direction could this thread have gone?


.........

Kentucky Fried Chokin
10/27/2008 8:54pm,
Someone once told me I was Serge-like, so I uchimataed, leglocked, and raped them.