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View Full Version : The BJJ sticker on my car won a fight yesterday



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artard
4/25/2008 6:58pm,
So I've been doing BJJ for about a year now (just got my 4th stripe booya) and I am actually getting pretty decent at manhandling other white belts, girls, high school kids, skinny middle aged dudes, fat people, etc. But that's not what this story is about. I drive a sweet new Impreza sedan and though I normally hate stickers on cars I put one of my BJJ school's stickers on the back windshield so I could represent the place I spend so many hours a week.

Anyway, yesterday afternoon I was driving home after school, counting the days until I graduate (3 more days of class + finals as of this post FYI). The street I live on intersects with one of the main roads in Boulder, and happens to be right near the edge of town where the two lane road turns into a one lane road (and eventually a highway out of town) and needless to say, people do some really dumb **** trying to merge in front of other people. I don't really give a **** about who merges in front of who because 100 feet after the road becomes one lane I turn to the side street where I live. Yesterday, I am driving on this stretch of road when a red pickup truck comes flying by me and nearly clips my front end cutting in front of me at the last second possible. Even better, immediately after cutting in front of me he starts signaling to turn on the same road that I live on and I laugh at the ridiculousness of his actions. It was pretty heinous but I'm not the type to road rage so I just pulled out my go-to move when someone does something retarded and dickish in traffic and I gave him a big thumbs up and smiled.

He was paying attention apparently because the truck swerved to the side in anger as he stuck both arms out the window and flipped me off and I see a 3rd hand flipping me off from the passenger window in short order. At the same moment this is happening I am signaling to turn on the same road as him which seems to anger him even more because right after we turn onto the road I live on he pulls his car over in a very angry fashion and starts opening his door. I'm laughing my ass off at this point because it looks like he thinks I'm following him because I want to fight or something. As he's getting out of his car and gesturing toward me, I roll past him and shrug my arms, basically giving him a "what the **** dude" look. The passenger in the car yells something unintelligible and the driver jumps back in the truck and starts tailing me.

At this point the joke has worn off and Iím starting to get concerned. Iím not a large person, about 5í9 155 pounds and the guy in the car looks pretty big/fat, and he has a younger-looking passenger with him, and besides I donít want to fight anyway. I also donít want them to know where I live so I canít stop at my house. I start driving really slowly, planning on making a circle around the block and getting back on the main road and driving around town until they lose interest and/or I stop in front of a police station. The red truck starts creeping up right on my ass until heís probably 2 feet away from my bumper. The whole time Iíve been watching them in my rear view mirror and they are obviously talking each other up about how theyíre going to crush my ****** ass or whatever.

Suddenly, the passenger abruptly signals to the driver and looks concerned. He is pointing at something ahead and the driver follows his signal and squints his eyes while focusing on the back of my car. They are looking at the BJJ sticker on my rear windshield. Apparently, they are UFC fans and listen to what Joe Rogan says because what ensues looks like a much more somber discussion between them and they exchange glances a few times before the red truck backs off my tail, pulls a quick U-turn and they speed off in the opposite direction while giving me middle fingers out both sides of the car. Did they seriously just back down because of a sticker on my car or did they realize the ridiculousness of the entire situation and that they were trying to start a fight with the person they had just cut off in traffic and then received a thumbs up from?

I pulled over and collected myself for a minute while reflecting on what just happened and nervously laughing at how much worse the whole situation could have played out.

colonelpong2
4/25/2008 7:09pm,
Are you sure they backed off because they noticed the sticker? Could it not be that the sawn off shotgun propped against the back seat had something to do with it?

krazy kaju
4/25/2008 7:13pm,
WOW. You should have chased them just to see if they really were retarded.

Squerlli
4/25/2008 7:44pm,
You just subbed somebody from your CAR while a good 10 feet AWAY from them. WITH OUT ACTUALLY TOUCHING THEM!

Someone deserves a promotion for this.

artard
4/25/2008 7:47pm,
I was thinking about asking one of my BJJ coaches to award my sticker a couple stripes for its brave performance

Brandon
4/25/2008 7:51pm,
A no touch tap out.

Squerlli
4/25/2008 7:51pm,
I was thinking about asking one of my BJJ coaches to award my sticker a couple stripes for its brave performance

Dude your sticker subbed A FUCKING CAR. Your sticker is now an 11th degree BJJ black belt.

Someone call Helio and tell him to bow down!

prezbuluskey
4/25/2008 7:57pm,
Have you considered making this a commercial for your school? That would be awesome.

"Oh no Jimbob! He trains at [Insert Name] BJJ! RUN!!"

And then you have sunglasses on and give a thumbs up as they run away.

Jadonblade
4/25/2008 8:02pm,
Your sticker now out ranks you, I demand photo evidence of you posing next to said sticker.

The Question
4/25/2008 8:04pm,
You have a BJJ sticker on your car? Gay.

Hooded Justice
4/25/2008 8:41pm,
Yet more proof that BJJ works on t3h str33tz.

Squerlli
4/25/2008 8:48pm,
Your sticker now out ranks you, I demand photo evidence of you posing next to said sticker.

I second the notion.

Hex
4/25/2008 8:51pm,
They had you outnumbered 2 to 1 and they backed down because of a sticker on your car?

I'm going to risk the wrath of the nutriders and say that your BJJ probably wouldn't have helped much if they had decided to go after you at the same time.

If you had had an NRA sticker on your car on the other hand....

Brandon
4/25/2008 8:55pm,
"Dude that guy has a Jiu Jitsu sticker on his car"

"He does? ****, he's probably gay. If we beat him up it'll be a hate crime."

"You're right, we'd better leave."

colonelpong2
4/25/2008 11:32pm,
Wow. Sorry to go off topic here.

Im here in my usual internet cafe. The young lady working here at the moment is quite astonishing. I have noticed her before.
As much as I hate to make such ungentlemanly comments... Jesus christ.
She is wearing a very short denim mini skirt and a singlet. Her legs are smooth and long, well toned and athletic. Perfectly formed calves.
She has these big, wide framed red glasses that coupled with her efficiently ponytailed hair makes her look every bit the librarian. Why is that appealing? I dont know. It just is.
She stepped over my pack a moment ago and said "Sorry, do you mind if I open this door?" (i was seated at a computer by a side door, obviously).
Her voice is lilting and seductive every time I hear her speak.
Even such sweet nothings like "You forgot your change sir", "Sorry, the CD Drive on that one doesnt work at the moment" or "What the hell are you leering at, idiot" make my heart melt.
*SIGH*

Its saturday and im in an internet cafe. I guess that says it all.

NJM
4/25/2008 11:43pm,
"Dude that guy has a Jiu Jitsu sticker on his car"

"He does? ****, he's probably gay. If we beat him up it'll be a hate crime."

"You're right, we'd better leave."

Thread won.