PDA

View Full Version : TKD meets t3h st33t fighter.



Pages : [1] 2 3 4 5 6

HonkyTonkMan
7/13/2007 3:35pm,
The build up on this is long but stay with me.

Last night I was in TKD class. During the sparring session of class the Instructor had some of the higher rank belts pair up with some of the newer students.

I was paired up with a Yellow belt girl (14 years old) At Yellow belt they cant spar but the instructor wanted them to get used to throwing punches at a moving target. This means little to no contact on both parties.

Being an Assistant Instructor the Head Instructor asked me to work with the new Girl. The first thing I noticed was that she would keep her hands up against her chest with the palms of her fists facing her. I told her loosen up a bit and relax. She then began throwing punches at me. No hip torque, nothing but arm, like a chain punch. She would also strike me with her fist in a vertical position. This is to say that her thumb was facing the ceiling.

I corrected her gently about this, and she looked me dead in the eye, and with all seriousness she says...

"This is how we do it on the streets."

Keep in mind that she does NOT live in a bad area, nor attend a bad school. Typical suburban teenage girl.

Being somewhat taken aback, I asked her what she had just said. She repeated it.

I decided to ignore it and try again. At this point she stepped back and said this is how you punch on the streets. I said "Really?"

She told me, "yeah this is how I learned it on the street."

She put her fist next to her rib cage , palm up and punched with nothing but arm power, while she rotated her fist to where the little finger was looking up. She then informed me that the rotation was to be used against people wearing heavy clothes and that not only would the fist rotation cause a friction burn to your opponent , causing them to jump back, but that this also caused the blood to flow differently down your arm. That way if you got cut you would only bleed from your knuckles and not your wrist or top of your hand.


Holy fucking ****....I couldnt believe it.

I asked her to try it on me. She did, and I just stood there for a second and then rubbed my chest like it burned me. She said "See...it works."

I informed her I was just joshing her.

I then ran over and got the rubber knife form the equipment shelf and asked her how she would handle an attacker with a knife.

Her reply.....?

"No one ever uses a knife on the street."

I almost wept openly.

Instead I burst out laughing till I almost choked. Then I walked away.

Shinkengata
7/13/2007 3:40pm,
That just made my day. I'm almost crying right now. :tongue5:


With kids like that, is it any wonder that Konigun Ninjutsu is so successful in Mississippi?

gramlock
7/13/2007 3:40pm,
Did her mother consume an obscene amount of alcohol during pregnancy?

Also, why can't they spar at yellow belt?

HonkyTonkMan
7/13/2007 3:41pm,
They usually have to wait until green belt. It lets them get some kind of control and flexibility.

I havent ever met her mother, maybe she is a ghost and I imagined it.

It is Fake
7/13/2007 3:50pm,
Oh wow.

That is pretty damn funny.

Shinkengata
7/13/2007 4:35pm,
You're damn lucky you didn't get caught by a true chain punch, chain punches do have the entire moving body mass behind them though, different from just an arm sticking out


Officially the most Ninja thing I've heard today.

Lujke
7/13/2007 4:48pm,
Ninjas only chain punch to deceive their opponents into thinking they can't fight. Damn sneaky, those ninjas. Then they flip out and kill everybody.

Sun Wukong
7/13/2007 4:48pm,
the streets, etc.

Kids say the darnedest things.

M1K3
7/13/2007 4:53pm,
You're damn lucky you didn't get caught by a true chain punch, chain punches do have the entire moving body mass behind them though, different from just an arm sticking out

Every time I think you have reached bottom someone throws you a shovel and you start digging some more.

Shinkengata
7/13/2007 5:18pm,
ooo-wee T-shane!!

You just created a crawl space under your rock bottom.

M1K3
7/13/2007 6:15pm,
Sounds like in Mississippi the d34dly on the str33t is a nipple twister. BTW I thought they only had dirt roads in Mississippi.

HonkyTonkMan
7/13/2007 7:20pm,
Sounds like in Mississippi the d34dly on the str33t is a nipple twister. BTW I thought they only had dirt roads in Mississippi.


Thats why BJJ and Grappling Arts dont work past the state line. Any street fight would definitely include rocks, lava, and broken glass.

FFF asked me ( I called him on my way home from class, he didnt answer but I talked to him today )

"Did she say street with 3's in it?"

She might as well have. I am sure this isnt going to be the last nugget of wisdom she imparts on me. I will keep this thread up to date.

meggaman7
7/13/2007 7:35pm,
Why/how are kids so fucking stupid?

hoodedmonk
7/13/2007 7:49pm,
Wow! dam oldman youre lucky to still be alive. I wonder who in the hell told her about the deadly chain punch? Maybe she has a crazy dad or older brother or something.

HonkyTonkMan
7/13/2007 7:54pm,
I have a nasty sweat stain (might be lotion) from her on my Gi.

Thats as close as I ever want to come to t3h d34dly again.

MOM34 says that Im an asshole for getting the knife.

I should have just charged her and knocked her down....all the while screaming
"Choo wunt sum Joo Jitsoo beeaattcchhh!!?"

Then gone to get a drink of water....

vigilus
7/13/2007 8:04pm,
Why/how are kids so fucking stupid?

Well, she *IS* 14 and clearly someone along the way taught her poorly so it's up to oldman to take her and unteach the bad and impart the good.