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View Full Version : Stupid things you used to believe about martial arts




GoldenJonas
1/25/2007 11:34am,
All we had was singlets...

and big fiberglass earmuffs. Besides, singlets are teh gahy...Oh, wait, I think I still have mine from college track. Nevermind.

The best is the r-tards who STILL wear the wrestling shoes with pegged acid wash jeans...HELLO, 1983 called and it wants to kill you.

It is Fake
1/25/2007 11:37am,
I thought we did, Sifu Randy Abel(KungFuDoesWork), wasn't he Drunken Monkey?
No, it is one of the 5 forms of monkey which include Drunken, Tall, Lost, Wooden, and Stone in supposed classical monkey style kung fu.



No one has said it so, I will. Shaolin Monks can never be defeated and had/have the best training in the world.

I could kick Royce's ass cause I had the deadly eye gouge, throat punch, and Pressure Points.

You aren't fighting unless you "look" like a kung fu movie.


Pressure points/Dim Mak/Tien Shui works (it does but, that is for another thread).

Neildo
1/25/2007 11:46am,
This thread makes me sad :(

NunOnBreak
1/25/2007 11:53am,
Anyone else convinced that Spock's paralyzing neck grab actually worked when they were a kid?

plasma
1/25/2007 11:54am,
Anyone else convinced that Spock's paralyzing neck grab actually worked when they were a kid?
No. Were you in the special class?

Epicurus
1/25/2007 12:11pm,
I once believed also that however hopeless things were over here, somewhere, on a mountaintop, was a temple for of shaolin or tibetan monks throwing around chi balls and flying, at perfect peace wit the universe and having unbeatable skills.

I also believed that I could drop an attacker of nearly any size with a sidekick to the kneecap (alas, such a move is too deadly for sparring!!!1) and that the way a headbutt worked was to smash your forehead against your opponent's forehead (in the same spot) and hope that your head was harder.

I also believed that I could invent my own fighting art based on the illustrations in the book "Secrets of the Samurai" if I worked at it for a few hours a week (no previous training) - my "art" was called "oradobulov" (I am not making this up) which was an attack yelled by a character in the game "battle Tycoon" for the SNES ... it had only a few moves, one of which was a flying knee to the head while screaming and chambering two punches, the other being crouching down low, sticking your arms out to either side, and spinning around until you hit your opponent.

I feel so... dirty.

Neildo
1/25/2007 12:14pm,
Holy crap. I think weve reached a new high. Or low....yeah, definately low.

no_god
1/25/2007 12:20pm,
Wushu and Aikido = good
ninjas = good
BJJ/ Grappling = gay, stupid
Bruce Lee = God

NunOnBreak
1/25/2007 12:28pm,
No. Were you in the special class?

Yes, I was in advanced placement from grade 4 on. By the time high school ended I already had college credits in English, Biology, and Art. I got a 32 on my ACT, 35 in the science portion.

phuquedup
1/25/2007 12:49pm,
I also believed that I could invent my own fighting art based on the illustrations in the book "Secrets of the Samurai" if I worked at it for a few hours a week (no previous training) - my "art" was called "oradobulov" (I am not making this up) which was an attack yelled by a character in the game "battle Tycoon" for the SNES ... it had only a few moves, one of which was a flying knee to the head while screaming and chambering two punches, the other being crouching down low, sticking your arms out to either side, and spinning around until you hit your opponent.

There's a particularly nerdy expression that is applicable here :

thread won by Epicurus

M1K3
1/25/2007 12:57pm,
I'm supprised I haven't seen this one yet,

Karate teaches you how to fight so you know how not to fight.

Not only were singlets gay but we had to wear what was basically a pair of tights underneath it. Everyone wore knee pads just to cover up would you could of the stupid tights. On yeah, this was 1970 and 71.

Also, pro wrestling may have been fake, but headlocks, sicissors, arm locks, full nelsons and other stuff could work unlike a lot of the larping stuff you see in martial arts today. It was the reason I started wrestling. That and I couldn't box like Ali to save my life, and if you couldn't box like Ali, why even try.

Camus
1/25/2007 1:01pm,
LOL at the number of wrestlers who thought wrestling was useless and didn't realize that they could already probably beat 80% of other martial artists to a bloody mess.

I thank god for this given that I fought several wrestlers in high school and not one of them ever tried to take me down, even with nothing stopping them from doing so. We just threw sloppy punches and knees at each other.

On the other hand, I kinda wish one had DLT'ed and gnp'ed me, would have started taking grappling sooner prolly.

plasma
1/25/2007 1:03pm,
Yes, I was in advanced placement from grade 4 on. By the time high school ended I already had college credits in English, Biology, and Art. I got a 32 on my ACT, 35 in the science portion.



And now you post on internet forums. All the education to waste.

Epicurus
1/25/2007 1:21pm,
And now you post on internet forums. All the education to waste.
Not to mention he does Kakujenbo...

P.S: Despite how astonishingly stupid my history-book-and-snes-game based art was, I bet someone trained only in that could still beat an aikidoka or a Bujinkan student.

Abusivemelon
1/25/2007 1:43pm,
I train Karate.

Im grateful to all at Bullshido who have shown me teh b0010ck5 in MA's.
I will soon be starting Judo.

MaverickZ
1/25/2007 1:47pm,
That tae kwon do doesn't work.