View Full Version : Your Greatest Excuse for Being a Lazy SOB

3/03/2005 6:05am,
As told by me, to my boss, earlier today:

"You know what, I don't think you have the proper respect for lazy people. What if Osama bin Laden was lazy? What if one day, his terrorist buddies came up to his cave and were all like, 'Hey Osama, let's go blow **** up!', and he was like, 'Nah dude, go kill Americans without me.' Bam, no 9/11, no war in Afghanistan, no war in Iraq. Lazy people prevent war."

I consider it one of the rare moments in which something I say ascends to the lofty heights of spontaneous comedic mediocrity. Specious logic aside, I'm sure there are some others around here with gems like this lying around, so let's hear them.

3/03/2005 9:14am,
Wars are never started by the apathetic. Not that anyone cares.

3/03/2005 11:42am,
"I'm pacing myself"

3/03/2005 4:58pm,
I'd answer that question, but I can't be bothered.


3/03/2005 6:05pm,
I spend too much time on Bullshido.

3/03/2005 6:14pm,
I'm a philosopher. I need time to think about the stuff that really matters.

3/03/2005 6:29pm,
I'm "coming back"...


Can Chaser
3/04/2005 12:32am,
[On a friday night] I have to get enough sleep after I wash horses and clean tack to get up at 4 to leave for my show tomorrow. Go to the movies without me."

"There's not enough hours in the day"

"You know, getting enough sleep is so much work. I wish somebody would invent sleep tablets so that you don't have to get any sleep, for lazy people like me."

3/04/2005 12:39am,
Ahhh Can Chaser you are so young. Allow me to share some wisdom. You do not need sleep tablets to get more work time. You need work tablets so you can sleep more. That is the heart of lethargy.