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Lebell
3/12/2012 6:20pm,
Earlier today I was adressed by a frightened neighbour.

She told me the guy living next to her is threatening her, banging on her door late at night and has psychotic violent episodes.

He seems to target only females, as I've bumped into him several times and he doesnt even as much as stare at me.

Also he has assaulted a woman who used to live in our building, this was some time ago, and I knew nothing about this until now.

Why this thread?
Well, in Lolland you can't rely on the cops cos they are either cowards or ' unavailable/our hands are tied'.

And I could really use some practical tips to get rid of this fucker.
(already working on a legal procedure, police, local authorities etc)

I'm basically crowdsourcing here.

Permalost
3/12/2012 6:41pm,
Seduce her into having you stay the night at her place, make sweet love, wait for him to bang on the door, open it quickly and knock him into a wall with a mighty front kick, go back and make sweet love again. Repeat as necessary.

Middlefinger
3/12/2012 6:43pm,
Rape him.

Lebell
3/12/2012 6:54pm,
Real handy advice, like shrimp in his ventilation system etc.
except we dont have those systems.

the upstairs girl is pretty hot, but im pretty sure my gf would cut of my dick if she found out.

Jim_Jude
3/12/2012 7:24pm,
Real handy advice, like shrimp in his ventilation system etc.
except we dont have those systems.

the upstairs girl is pretty hot, but im pretty sure my gf would cut of my dick if she found out.

Just tell her you're doing it all for the greater good, for "the neighborhood". If she doesn't like it, banish her.

Lebell
3/12/2012 7:29pm,
she is russian.
do not **** with russian wimminz, especially when they are serious with you.
it will also **** up my holidayplans.

on another note: I really dont wanna become the go to guy whenever some weirdo is getting violent, he doesnt really bother me, yet i dont just want to look the other way, im not a coward.

Permalost
3/12/2012 9:32pm,
Joke and serious responses rolled into one: make a blowgun.

RurikGreenwulf
3/12/2012 9:47pm,
Go have a serious talk to him, if he is only targeting single women he is a coward go with crazy eyes tell him you are watching him and you know where he lives, that after the war you cant leave people maraunding in your perimeter tell him you watch him sleep

TheMightyMcClaw
3/13/2012 12:54am,
Do you have real life superheroes in Holland? Because if you do, that would be by far the most entertaining way to solve your problem. And I'm sure they'd love a chance to do something besides hand out food to the homeless and argue with eachother on facebook.

JohnKenner
3/13/2012 1:00am,
Do you have real life superheroes in Holland? Because if you do, that would be by far the most entertaining way to solve your problem. And I'm sure they'd love a chance to do something besides hand out food to the homeless and argue with eachother on facebook.

Perhaps pool together some money within the building and buy Phoenix Jones a plane ticket?

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q8wvnrzoK_4&feature=related

Lebell
3/13/2012 6:25am,
Go have a serious talk to him, if he is only targeting single women he is a coward go with crazy eyes tell him you are watching him and you know where he lives, that after the war you cant leave people maraunding in your perimeter tell him you watch him sleep

haha he'd actually believe that if I told him this.
there is a worrying thing to this: as far as I can tell he is paranoid.
talking to himself, that wild hunted stare in his eyes, walking up and down the hallways.
randomly banging atdoors.

I just can't tell how close he is to going batshit insane knifewielding rampage mode.

Moenstah
3/13/2012 6:39am,
Well, if he really has mental problems, it will be hard to knock sense into him, and a dick move. The legal procedure would be the right track, but it will take a while to get someone evicted, and nigh impossible if he's the owner of his appartment.

nils
3/13/2012 6:59am,
Im by no means a lawyer, but if the stalking-laws are the same as in germany (which they should more or less because they were instigated by the EU), that could be a possibility.
Also, there are a few Organisations who are helping crime victims and give advice on crime-prevention. Those tend to be a much better solution than incompetent cops. "Slachtofferhulp Nederland" (whatever that means) seems to be the main address to go to.

Cayvmann
3/13/2012 7:16am,
Tire iron, duct tape, garbage bags, long lonely highway at night

Lebell
3/13/2012 8:11am,
Moenstah: its all rent. it's basically poor people housing appartment.

Nils: LOL! slachtofferhulp is after you've been stabbed or victimised in some way, im trying to avoid anyone needing those guys!
Also Berlin: planning to go there on my way to prague this summer.

Cavyman: lonely highway?? I live in one of the most dense populated areas in the world!

Ignorami
3/13/2012 8:39am,
Cavyman: lonely highway?? I live in one of the most dense populated areas in the world!

And don't you people have to cycle everywhere? It's going to be a bitch pedaling with a full bodybag in your front basket.

Wait until the guy goes into your local convenience store. Phone the store and tell them you are robbing it. Say your partner is in the store, and he has a gun. Describe him, and tell the clerk to "hand him the fucking money". Then let the police sort him out.


*I should perhaps stress that the suggestion is for amusement purposes only, and not a sensible plan, as I live in Nanny State Britain, where no-one in authority can spot a joke anymore.