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Toby Christensen
3/09/2004 3:06am,
To all you stylists (and that means YOU as well, Kungfoolss)



In about a month, I begin training with someone who trained under Larry Hartsell, amongst others.

I am considerably big and strong for a spazza, being 182cm or so in my shoes and striving for a top weight of 80kg-85kg in muscle. (Imperial Users out there, do the conversions!)

I have been doing lots of walking in my heavy shoes to maintain leg flexibility and strength and cardiovascular endurance, eating lots of protein and carbohydrate and practising approximations of wrestling moves that work for me.

My goal is NOT to tap someone out. My goal is to throw a person on to their head or break their fingers or limbs, rip out their body hair (which REALLY can hurt) skin torture them, smash them with my gibbous cranium, bite them on a vulnerable spot, pressure point them etc. I am not interested in half measures.

My units of attack are as stated by Gene Lebell (exalted be he) arms legs head and teeth.

I already know a nifty sleeper hold, some skin torture, finger twists, a toehold and the fullnelson, as well as numerous other tricks. My headbutting is quite good and my teeth are sharp. I can also trip and sweep quite well and my version of the fireman's carry throw is coming along well. All these will be improved by my very talented instructor.


I would like to add:
Some more simple takedowns
Some good armbars to break arms
Some more leglocks to break legs
Some upper body throws not requiring a gi hold (specifically the arm toss and hip toss, but others are good)
How to scrotumlock
How to bearhug effectively
How to bring someone down with an armdrag and wrist manipulation to twist their hand until the fucker nearly twists off
How turn people over and backmount them
How to drag people around in a headlock and secure their ear in my teeth, to ward off multiple attackers

etc.

Please help

With love and belligerence
Angry Spastic

JKDChick
3/09/2004 3:09am,
How, exactly, are we supposed to help you on a message forum? If you're starting training in a bit, perhaps you should ask THAT person to help. *intended to be less sarcastic than it sounds*

Also, does this:
I already know a nifty sleeper hold, some skin torture, finger twists, a toehold and the fullnelson, as well as numerous other tricks. sound like porn to anyone else?

GajusCaesar
3/09/2004 3:27am,
"How turn people over and backmount them"

I hear Hannibal and Black_Rose practice this all the time in their ninja school. . . You should ask them for a video demonstration.

Toby Christensen
3/09/2004 3:28am,
Yeah well

My instructor let's people choke him out etc. I'm not looking to learn a style, just a bunch of dirty tactics that WORK FOR ME.

Osiris, headbutting is NOT ineffective, biting SHOCKS people and HURTS and can sever extremities, ripping out body hair is a bit fiddly but has people writhe around and pressure points can render body parts inoperable.

JKD Chick

I love pornography, and besides you do BJJ and should know that sex and grappling have fundamentally different goals.

Deadpan Scientist
3/09/2004 3:46am,
Neglecting solid technique in favor of "dirty tactics" is retarded.

Toby Christensen
3/09/2004 3:52am,
Yeah, well I beat a judo blackbelt, so NYAAAHHH!!!!

Round 1: Eyegouge from side
Round 2: Choke from side
Round 3: Feinted to the side, kicked him in the knee and palmheeled him

Result:

SUCCESS!

EBMAS Jerry
3/09/2004 3:58am,
Originally posted by brandeissansoo
Neglecting solid technique in favor of "dirty tactics" is retarded.


Hey what ever works on the street works. Remember rules and fairness are for the ring not the street. If someone attacks you and then pulls a knife and stabs you can't call time out because he cheated.

"to be fair to your attacker is to be cruel to your self"

GajusCaesar
3/09/2004 4:41am,
Originally posted by EBMAS Jerry
Hey what ever works on the street works. Remember rules and fairness are for the ring not the street. If someone attacks you and then pulls a knife and stabs you can't call time out because he cheated.

"to be fair to your attacker is to be cruel to your self"

Dude, you might not want to wear that giant red and white bullseye on your head like that. . .

GajusCaesar
3/09/2004 4:43am,
Originally posted by Angry_Spastic
Yeah well

My instructor let's people choke him out etc. I'm not looking to learn a style, just a bunch of dirty tactics that WORK FOR ME.

Osiris, headbutting is NOT ineffective, biting SHOCKS people and HURTS and can sever extremities, ripping out body hair is a bit fiddly but has people writhe around and pressure points can render body parts inoperable.

JKD Chick

I love pornography, and besides you do BJJ and should know that sex and grappling have fundamentally different goals.

I tire of Kyokushin. I shall create my OWN style and it will be known as P0RN-FU. Then, kust as Kano, Oyama, and the Gracies have done, I will master this new art and travel the globe, dominating and converting all martial arts in my path to the new most effective style of fighting known to man!

(somehow this will involve lesbians because they are T3H HOT!)

J-kid
3/09/2004 8:20am,
www.bjj.org

J-kid
3/09/2004 9:29am,
www.onthemat.com

J-kid
3/09/2004 9:34am,
www.themat.com (wrestling)

The Wastrel
3/09/2004 9:46am,
----------------------------------------------------------------------
Originally posted by brandeissansoo
Neglecting solid technique in favor of "dirty tactics" is retarded.
----------------------------------------------------------------------



EBMASJerry: Hey what ever works on the street works. Remember rules and fairness are for the ring not the street. If someone attacks you and then pulls a knife and stabs you can't call time out because he cheated.


I...you...but...but...*sigh*...Nevermind, if his point was lost on you, mine will be as well.

GajusCaesar
3/09/2004 1:53pm,
Thanks, Osiris. That was much more direct and eloquent than I would have put it. Now we can only cross our fingers and hope. . .

BlackBeltNow
3/09/2004 10:36pm,
Originally posted by Angry_Spastic
Yeah well

My instructor let's people choke him out etc. I'm not looking to learn a style, just a bunch of dirty tactics that WORK FOR ME.

Osiris, headbutting is NOT ineffective, biting SHOCKS people and HURTS and can sever extremities, ripping out body hair is a bit fiddly but has people writhe around and pressure points can render body parts inoperable.

JKD Chick

I love pornography, and besides you do BJJ and should know that sex and grappling have fundamentally different goals.

the way u wrote ur posts...i don't think u'll go very far in martial arts. if u do, its cuz u think ur progresinng but u won't, i guarantee it unless u change ur impatient and intrinsic cocky attitude.

FingerorMoon?
3/09/2004 10:41pm,
I am considerably big and strong for a spazza

This is why


My goal is NOT to tap someone out. My goal is to throw a person on to their head or break their fingers or limbs, rip out their body hair (which REALLY can hurt) skin torture them, smash them with my gibbous cranium, bite them on a vulnerable spot, pressure point them etc.

Angry Spastic


How to scrotumlock

rules.