What would you do? Observing spouse abuse...

**It is Fake** · Posted On: 5/15/2010 8:33pm

Originally Posted by Kintanon

IIF And you don't find it disturbing that total apathy towards a situation like that is the behavior you expect to see?

Well, first I don't see total apathy. I see a bunch of people to scared to do ****. So, no.

**Vorpal** · Posted On: 5/15/2010 8:34pm

In situations like that I always step in. But I'm in law enforcement, I'm almost always armed and I'm 6'3, 235lbs. I understand why other people don't want to get involved.

**Emevas** · Posted On: 5/15/2010 8:35pm

I'm disturbed that you're disturbed that IIF isn't disturbed.

**BackFistMonkey** · Posted On: 5/15/2010 9:00pm

Originally Posted by Vorpal

In situations like that I always step in. But I'm in law enforcement, I'm almost always armed and I'm 6'3, 235lbs. I understand why other people don't want to get involved.

I have stepped in before and I have not stepped in .

These times that I did not , were exactly because of three reasons.

1. lack of authority in the situation
2. lack of size/skill/equipment to take authority of the situation
3. lack of faith in the situation and in authority to put the right person behind bars if **** went bad trying to separate or help control the situation.

I hate Kentucky with a passion.

**Anna Kovacs** · Posted On: 5/15/2010 9:07pm

Sitting in car one night waiting for bar to open one night in somewhat shady part of downtown Atlanta, thought I heard woman scream. Weigh whether or not I actually heard what I thought I heard and if I should do something for half a second. Got out of car to make sure I wasn't mistaken about noise. Heard it again. Ran in the direction of the screaming and saw two or three guys running after this girl on the sidewalk on the other side of the street from me.

Looked both ways to take note of traffic and prepared to sprint across street to intervene in whatever was going on.

Just before I did the girl turned around, slowed down and started laughing and it became apparent that they were all friends being silly and loud. False alarm but was proud to have been willing to investigate and do whatever was necessary.

If I saw the situation in the video going down I am proud to say with relative confidence I would probably intervene with very little hesitation.

Evil must be punished.

**GirlJock** · Posted On: 5/15/2010 9:10pm

Interesting videos. I've stepped into a situation before and got physical (not much...for whatever reason the guy didn't want to hit me) and I've called 911 when it was happening outside my apartment at 2 am. In that situation I was actually afraid to get popped by a fool with a sideways 9mm-so took the safe way out.

If I saw a woman like that in public I wouldn't make any assumptions about how she got that way. What I mean is, she may have been in an accident, she may be an mma fighter, or whatever. So just seeing the bruises, I would not assume anything. Bringing the boyfriend in and having him act that way certainly puts some gas on the fire. At the very least I would call the police and let them sort it out. If he got physical, I would probably get up and try and distract him. Not sure if I would be confrontational (you get a shotgun in your mouth for stupid **** these days) but I would try and distract him somehow.

The dress wouldn't matter much to me-both the men and women. I could care less how people dress-it doesn't impress me, nor deter me. I would need to do something and at the very least make a 911 call and tell the manager what is happening.

I was actually a little surprised at the lack of action with some people. This "it's none of my business ****" is for the birds. We are a society for Pete's sake. I think of it as....if one of my family members were in this position, how would I like the people to act, and I do that. This includes situations like this, medical, whatever....I think you have to at least make a phone call.

I can understand some hesitance to put yourself in danger-like I said...people get killed for looking at someone the wrong way, but in this age of cell phones, I don't think there is any excuse to do nothing.

**Gezere** · Posted On: 5/15/2010 10:07pm

My wife used to think I would get killed for my "superhero complex." I do tend to go out my way to help pple end trouble. I have stepped in several times to stop violence in action and being a BBM I don't usually have much trouble in that. I intervened with two girls once. The girlfriend who was pissed off was bigger than me and I was a bit worried. It was during a Bikini boxing night at Dreams (or Cream or whatever that club changed its name every other month) The smaller girlfriend was flirting with one of the girls in the pool "boxing" and big girlfriend got pissed off and snatched her up by her hair. I was standing next to them and thinking I would need something hard to club the big bitch with.

When it comes to the military I don't see things so black and white anymore and I do believe some violence is definitely justified. Not saying that to be a douchebag or advocate the unwarranted beating of a spouse but I have seen many situations where I believe I might have reacted the same way. I've always held that my biggest unforgivable sins in a relationship are an STD, pregnancy, and blatant public disrespect. Sadly I have seen violence stemming from all three and I can't say I would feel bad for the spouse on the receiving end. I know in the eyes of the law that DV is never justified but I truly believe sometimes someone needs their ass beat.

With that said the situations in the video I know how I would act. If I just see a woman with bruises I would ask if she is OK but not jump to conclusions. If she said she was being abused or gotten mugged, beat up, raped, etc I would definitely help. Now if the boyfriend is there and is being physically abusive I wouldn't hesitate to step in. If he is just verbally abusive I might just tell him to keep that **** down and that he needs to find a better way of dealing with things in public. Dress would not be a factor. Hell I would probably be more willing to come to the rescue of a proactively dressed woman.

***Omega Supreme*** · Posted On: 5/15/2010 10:22pm

Originally Posted by Gezere

My wife used to think I would get killed for my "superhero complex." I do tend to go out my way to help pple end trouble. I have stepped in several times to stop violence in action and being a BBM I don't usually have much trouble in that. I intervened with two girls once. The girlfriend who was pissed off was bigger than me and I was a bit worried. It was during a Bikini boxing night at Dreams (or Cream or whatever that club changed its name every other month) The smaller girlfriend was flirting with one of the girls in the pool "boxing" and big girlfriend got pissed off and snatched her up by her hair. I was standing next to them and thinking I would need something hard to club the big bitch with.

When it comes to the military I don't see things so black and white anymore and I do believe some violence is definitely justified. Not saying that to be a douchebag or advocate the unwarranted beating of a spouse but I have seen many situations where I believe I might have reacted the same way. I've always held that my biggest unforgivable sins in a relationship are an STD, pregnancy, and blatant public disrespect. Sadly I have seen violence stemming from all three and I can't say I would feel bad for the spouse on the receiving end. I know in the eyes of the law that DV is never justified but I truly believe sometimes someone needs their ass beat.

With that said the situations in the video I know how I would act. If I just see a woman with bruises I would ask if she is OK but not jump to conclusions. If she said she was being abused or gotten mugged, beat up, raped, etc I would definitely help. Now if the boyfriend is there and is being physically abusive I wouldn't hesitate to step in. If he is just verbally abusive I might just tell him to keep that **** down and that he needs to find a better way of dealing with things in public. Dress would not be a factor. Hell I would probably be more willing to come to the rescue of a proactively dressed woman.

What dumbass said.

**Gezere** · Posted On: 5/15/2010 10:35pm

You can be my superhero sidekick!
You can be Kato!

**omoplatypus** · Posted On: 5/15/2010 10:40pm

i've intervened twice. once a next door neighbor was abusing his girlfriend and i knocked on the door while my fiance called the cops. when the door was opened by the dude, his girl ran out and my fiance escorted her to a safe place while i peacefully restrained the guy.
the other time wasn't so simple.

i hate violence against women, and i will step in.

i'm also 6'4, 225 lbs, and sleeve tattoos on both arms. i can be scary when i want.