I'm better than you; prove me wrong-

**Stu-Jitsu** · Posted On: 4/21/2010 1:47am

Might as well make my 100th post here.

100th POST BIATCHEEEES!!!111!!11one

Love, Stu xD

**Arskanator** · Posted On: 4/21/2010 1:48am

Well I've yet to compete in MAs so I don't have any stories like that. Instead I'll just tell you what I did this morning.

I was driving home from a 13h nightshift, rather tired and slightly cranky. I stop at a gas-station next to the highway for a refill. Pumping gas in my car, I see an old man, carrying a gas canister walking to the station. I immediately thought that his car had ran out of gas, and I was correct.

As I finished my refueling, I turned to the man and asked if he needed a lift back to his car. He was thankfull but replied that his car was just about 500 meters down the road and he was perfectly capable of walking his way back. So in the end I didn't really get to help him but I felt good nevertheless.

**Gidi** · Posted On: 4/21/2010 1:59am

I once encountered a vending machine that had eaten this girl's change.
2 strong front-kicks later from me, and the machine gave her more than it took.
TKD FTW!

Yeah... that's my best MA story, I suck...

**meat monkey** · Posted On: 4/21/2010 2:03am

ahhhh...
I once did a cartwheel out of tomoenage in a Judo competetion once.

I felt special.

(lets just gloss over the fact that after my moment of being special I proceded to have my arse handed to me)

**Hooded Justice** · Posted On: 4/21/2010 2:31am

I was on a first date with a girl from the internet when about 30 minutes in she gets a call from her ex who says his current GF has sent someone to kill him. He is currently shot in the arm, has killed his would be assassin and can't go to the hospital because he just got out of jail.

All I hear is her saying "Wait calm down. Who tried to kill you? Why did she sent someone to kill you? If you're shot you need to go to the hospital. No I can't some get you I am 5 hours away." At this point I ask to talk to him because you can't be a spectator to something like this. She gave me the phone and my first question was oddly enough "So how's it going?" as a general reaction to starting a conversation. He was pretty calm and broke down why he couldn't go to the hospital and I told him that I had no medical training but that I could probably help him.

First I asked if he had any clean cloth he could use as a bandage. He said yeah. I asked if he had any alcohol and he said he was drinking a bottle of 151 to kill the pain. SO I told him he could pour the 151 on the wound to disinfect it but it would hurt about 10,000 worse than it did at the time. Then tie the cloth around the wound putting pressure on it (that is what they say in every movie and tv show so it has to be true right???) to help slow the bleeding and maybe if he is lucky it will clot but I warned he would probably get infected and he said he didn't care. I also told him that if the bleeding didn't stop from the pressure that he could light the 151 on fire to try and cauterize the wound. It worked for rambo and an ak round so why not this guy?

At this point I gave the phone to my date and just as she put it to her hear she jerked it away and I could hear him scream on the other end of the line. I asked and she confirmed that he indeed did pour the 151 on an open bullet wound. After that he decided to go to the hospital and dine n dash 'em. Things didn't work out between me and her and eventually she got back together with the guy and while talking over AIM one day she mentioned that he wanted her to thank me for my help. Even sent a pic of the scar and it turns out it wasn't a through and through but more of big flesh wound. Checking with my pharmacist and emt friends they agreed that I was "technically right" in my disinfecting and field dressing advice but they were not sure about lighting the 151 on fire.

MA related not in the least but I love this story and as god as my witness every bit of it is true. That is why interwebz dating = the win!

edit: On an MA related note I did win a Kumdo match 0 to -2. That is impressive in it's own sad way I suppose.

**Dr. Sleepless** · Posted On: 4/21/2010 3:01am

I once punched Omega in the face after making him fall for a feint jab into a left straight.

That's the coolest story I have.

**BackFistMonkey** · Posted On: 4/21/2010 3:05am

Originally Posted by Sirc

I once punched Omega in the face

Is your hand ok ?

**hpr** · Posted On: 4/21/2010 4:07am

I once choked out a purple belt. Well, just until he tapped, not out cold.

Because he let me.

**Lebell** · Posted On: 4/21/2010 5:45am

i once trained with Hoost and he sed i had good riddum.
(and im white! lol zomg!)

**Matt Phillips** · Posted On: 4/21/2010 6:03am

Originally Posted by Omega the Merciless

During a championship kickboxng match we were supposed to fight for the 190lbs champonshps. My opponent came in 12lbs overweight. I said "**** this bullshit we're fighting".

My opponent''s team mate knocked out my team mate in 35 seconds of the first round. My newly wed wife begged me not to take the fight as she sat in the front row. I told her it wasn't going to happen.

Durng the first round my opponent hit me so hard I fell out of the ring. He broke my jaw, dislocated my rib.

In the third round I ko'd my opponent to take the title. In disbelief I pointed to my wife and yelled " I love you" I fell backwards and did a kip up as the crowd yelled "You're the man" over and over again.

You watch movies, I've lived it.

Beat that one bitches.

Lest anyone forget, this was under the Draka ruleset which means 12 (yes 12) rounds of shin to shin low kick kickboxing (with throws). Even the Thais won't do more than 3 rounds.

Lest anyone forget Omega's opponent was a 7 time vet of the UFC.

:qleft5::qleft5:

(BTW I married my wife after dating her for 3 weeks. I'm still married to her today after 11 years.)

This is the greatest thing you have ever done
:bowdown: