Best martial art for zombie apocalypse?

**Midnight Star** · Posted On: 10/27/2011 12:13am

Originally Posted by The Juggernoob

Can zombies survive in an anoxic environment?

They're already dead, the problem is with nerve tissue breakdown - "dragon has no path". Which now that I think about it, is what happens when brain cells die. So technically, there shouldn't be a zombie to begin with. If we forgo that part, lol, then it's a problem with physical damage. Some "agents", if absorbed are passed in the blood. but without circulation, its subject to slow saturation. Like an animal in formalin, the specimen is intact, but would nerve pathways still exist, and if the chemical saturations get too high, would it interfere with reanimated tissue and how it functions biologically. And if the actually unionize.... we'll all wish we were zombies. Lol

**doofaloofa** · Posted On: 10/27/2011 1:20am

Well I for one welcome our zombie overlords

**The Juggernoob** · Posted On: 10/27/2011 1:22am

Originally Posted by doofaloofa

Well I for one welcome our zombie overlords

Yes, but as a masochistic necrophile, you would wouldnt you.

**doofaloofa** · Posted On: 10/27/2011 1:32am

Originally Posted by The Juggernoob

Yes, but as a masochistic necrophile, you would wouldnt you.

Know what I'm saying?

**The Juggernoob** · Posted On: 10/27/2011 1:38am

Originally Posted by doofaloofa

Know what I'm saying?

Sure do!

**doofaloofa** · Posted On: 10/27/2011 2:21am

Originally Posted by The Juggernoob

Sure do!

The horror!

anyway back to zombie smiteing

Sledge hammer too heavy for sustainable zombiecide, plus to use one effectivly require total comitment to the attack.

A good quality hardwood combines wackability and light weight

I would go for a one handed weopon, leaving the other free for defensive strategies

**The Juggernoob** · Posted On: 10/27/2011 2:36am

Originally Posted by doofaloofa

The horror!

anyway back to zombie smiteing

Sledge hammer too heavy for sustainable zombiecide, plus to use one effectivly require total comitment to the attack.

A good quality hardwood combines wackability and light weight

I would go for a one handed weopon, leaving the other free for defensive strategies

Machete and lightweight riot shield. Full body cover and a hardy blade. All this bludgeoning doesnt take into account that zombies can function heavily damaged. Behead them and the issue is solved.

**doofaloofa** · Posted On: 10/27/2011 3:40am

I've said it befor and I'll say it again...

Originally Posted by doofaloofa

for zombie destruction i recon bludgeons are a better choice than edged weapons. i have prepared an argument for your consideration

availability - blugeons such as a pick handle are cheap easy to find and can be carried in the boot/trunk legitamately. get pulled with a katana in the boot and lets see what happens. a pick hansle also serves as a usefull digging tool making the item twice as efficient to carry

usability - little skill is required to whack with a bludgeon. use of a sword in a maner that is safe to user and efficient takes a good deal of training

upkeep - the main advantage of a sword is the possibility of one strike one kill. to keep this edge you must keep your edge (if you'll pardon the pun). sharpening the sword is time consuming, difficult and provides ample oppertunities for accidental infection

fouling - it would be pretty embarasing if your sword gets stuck in the spine of animate zombie

efficiency - the sword has to beat a bludgeon. it would take a lot of whacks to destroy the brain

cross contamination - when i butcher a side of pork that has been dead after three or four days there is very little in the way of body fluids, so i dont think there would be the type of gore fountains in the films, so there is an equal risk for both weapon types. zombies would have extremely swolen ankles.

moral - every body hates a show off

**The Juggernoob** · Posted On: 10/27/2011 3:50am

Blunt a good machete and it fills every category you've got there. So how is it not the best?

Also, you're not taking into account that even a blunt machete would work well, light weight equates to faster swing speed and less fatigue, thin but sturdy profile equals force distributed through smaller surface area. It balances out nicely.

If you were ordering cold steel magnum Kukrhi machetes, you could buy 5 for about £100, so stocking up wouldnt totally bankrupt you, besides, thats a high cost quality machete. Cheaper ones are also available. Maintenence is little more than oil and a good grit stone.

**Kovacs** · Posted On: 10/27/2011 3:57am

I've been using one of these at work and they could easily remove someone's head.

http://www.google.co.uk/m/search?sit...insaw&sa=N#i=2

It has obvious draw backs like starting from cold and reliance on fuel and noise but if you knew you were going to be in the open you could make very short work of an awful lot of zombies.