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  1. proteinshakez is offline

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    Posted On:
    5/16/2011 11:30am


     Style: Shotokan, BJJ, Muay Thai

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by tao.jonez View Post
    Look, Zombies are dead therefore cold-blooded. There are no large, cold blooded creatures in the polar regions. Ergo, there are no Zombies in the polar regions.

    Why does everyone want to fight the zombies? Smart money is on avoidance and deception. So ninjitsu and farming are the best skills for Zombie Apocalypse.
    That's the issue my friend, it's hard to use deception on something that has NO other brain function outside of wanting to eat your face. Once they're focused on getting you it doesn't matter what ninjer tricks you use, outside of someone ELSE distracting them, you're kinda fucked.
  2. Sri Hanuman is offline
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    Posted On:
    5/16/2011 11:53am

    Join us... or die
     Style: Cheng Man Ching Taijiquan

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by tao.jonez View Post
    Look, Zombies are dead therefore cold-blooded. There are no large, cold blooded creatures in the polar regions. Ergo, there are no Zombies in the polar regions.

    Why does everyone want to fight the zombies? Smart money is on avoidance and deception. So ninjitsu and farming are the best skills for Zombie Apocalypse.
    Global warming is your real enemy.
    =================
    Kama Sutra blue belt.

    Quote Originally Posted by Emevas View Post
    I used to **** guys like you in prison.
    Quote Originally Posted by Rock Ape View Post
    Dude I kill people for a fucking living.

    Dipshit
  3. Sri Hanuman is offline
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    Posted On:
    5/16/2011 12:00pm

    Join us... or die
     Style: Cheng Man Ching Taijiquan

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by proteinshakez View Post
    1. That's why i said i'd have my metal bo (can easily thrust through a zombie with it with all that decayed flesh, and use it in short bursts to smash their heads open, don't need to "swing" it in the same way", this will be good when i get caught in tight spaces. Think of it like some 300 ****, they'll have to shamble in one at a time if the space is THAT limited that i couldn't use the sword. Sap gloves would be a last line of defense, of course i'd be covered from head to toe to avoid blood splatter.
    Metal bo might be a good choice. Hope you have good precision.

    2. cut the torso off (if i'm cleaving through the torso, then the arms are coming off too, there's no crawling after me unless they wanna move forward by sticking their teeth in the ground and pulling with their necks lol)
    What if the zombie is reaching towards you? There's no guarantee that their arms will stay down, or that they are all even height, so that the cut could very much leave the arms intact, leaving large number of crawlers coming after you.

    World War Z. Grenades bad for same reason.

    3. Right, and firing loud explosive firearms will go by unheard or seen right? Once those fuckers see you they all see you, doesn't matter if you have a piece of metal or a firearm.
    Where did you hear me mention loud firearms?

    4. If i can't handle swinging that thing for a few minutes at a time, then i don't deserve to make it out anyways. Only the strong survive t3h zombi3z!
    How much does a buster sword weigh?
    For arguement's sake, let's say approximately 50-75lbs.
    Unless you're a competent body builder or the like, there's no way you can swing that for an extended period of time.
    ****, a 50lbs kettle bell wears me out after 30 squats (60 if you count both sides,) and that takes less than 5 min. Anything more than that may easily induce violent nausea. Imagine what a giant sword that makes frequent impact on moving objects is going to do to your hands there buddy.

    You'll be shaking like an overweight ginger trekkie virgin whose cousin has to take him to the prom because her mother promised to buy her a pony. Not pretty.

    Lets not forget as i said, i wouldn't need to always cut them down either, rotting flesh plus huge bludgening tool = bad time for them. Even if i didn't cut them in half with it, hitting them with it would break every bone/tendon/joint in the area i hit, rotting flesh doesn't hold up too well to force, they might not be stopped but they certainly won't be getting back up when they have no movable bone structure left.
    Meh.
    =================
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    Quote Originally Posted by Emevas View Post
    I used to **** guys like you in prison.
    Quote Originally Posted by Rock Ape View Post
    Dude I kill people for a fucking living.

    Dipshit
  4. Vince Tortelli is offline

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    Posted On:
    5/16/2011 2:48pm

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    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    For H2H vs a zombie, the choice is clear.
    Arm drag.
    Achieve a rear body lock.
    Back body suplex (see Dan Severn v. Anthony Macias).

    Alternatively, arm drag style kuzushi to set up Ura Nage may be used if the zombie has on a jacket of some kind.
    When facing a zombie, hit them with the biggest weapon of all...Mother Earth.
  5. proteinshakez is offline

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    Posted On:
    5/16/2011 2:56pm


     Style: Shotokan, BJJ, Muay Thai

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Sri Hanuman View Post
    Metal bo might be a good choice. Hope you have good precision.



    What if the zombie is reaching towards you? There's no guarantee that their arms will stay down, or that they are all even height, so that the cut could very much leave the arms intact, leaving large number of crawlers coming after you.

    World War Z. Grenades bad for same reason.



    Where did you hear me mention loud firearms?



    How much does a buster sword weigh?
    For arguement's sake, let's say approximately 50-75lbs.
    Unless you're a competent body builder or the like, there's no way you can swing that for an extended period of time.
    ****, a 50lbs kettle bell wears me out after 30 squats (60 if you count both sides,) and that takes less than 5 min. Anything more than that may easily induce violent nausea. Imagine what a giant sword that makes frequent impact on moving objects is going to do to your hands there buddy.

    You'll be shaking like an overweight ginger trekkie virgin whose cousin has to take him to the prom because her mother promised to buy her a pony. Not pretty.



    Meh.
    in order of your responses:

    1. I do, i train with it pretty regularly actually, hell of a shoulder workout let me tell you :)

    2. Eh perhaps, it'd still drop the numbers down pretty well.

    3. The one i have is around 20 pounds give or take, i can handle it pretty well and have swung it around for 10-15 minutes straight at times. I was dead tired sure, but that's why if i was actually concerned with Z day i'd start training with it ALL the time and have it be nothing by that point :) I have death grip hands believe me, plus zombies are squishy, the impact wouldn't hurt me that much.

    4. Meh indeed sir, meh indeed.

    I mean realistically i'd use the bo most of the time anyways, especially for smaller encounters. I'd only get the sword out when i was completely surrounded and couldn't run. Not to mention i'd have rabbit legs from carrying that fucker around all the time.
  6. Permalost is online now
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    pro nonsense self defense

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    Posted On:
    5/16/2011 2:58pm

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     Style: FMA, dumbek, Indian clubs

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I'd think shihonage done hard to whip the head into the ground might be a good one. It doesn't work on real people so well, but zombies are single minded and all. Actually a zombie apocalypse might make aikido more useful, like those weird aikido randori drills where people attack you by, uh, running at you with outstretched arms.
  7. Sri Hanuman is offline
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    Posted On:
    5/16/2011 3:04pm

    Join us... or die
     Style: Cheng Man Ching Taijiquan

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    You know what? **** it. I'd just wire some high yield C4 to a remote detonator, and spend weeks luring the fuckers into the blast radius.
    =================
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    Quote Originally Posted by Emevas View Post
    I used to **** guys like you in prison.
    Quote Originally Posted by Rock Ape View Post
    Dude I kill people for a fucking living.

    Dipshit
  8. proteinshakez is offline

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    Posted On:
    5/16/2011 3:45pm


     Style: Shotokan, BJJ, Muay Thai

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Permalost View Post
    I'd think shihonage done hard to whip the head into the ground might be a good one. It doesn't work on real people so well, but zombies are single minded and all. Actually a zombie apocalypse might make aikido more useful, like those weird aikido randori drills where people attack you by, uh, running at you with outstretched arms.
    The issue with aikido would be potential scratches and infection. Not to mention it'd be hard to throw and flip those things with limbs flying off when you grab them, that gives them an opportunity to keep coming at you when you're looking at their arm in your hand going "huh?!?NOMNOMNOM"
  9. doofaloofa is online now
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    I'm Svelte!

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    Posted On:
    5/16/2011 4:58pm

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     Style: mma

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    if zombie apocalypse is a metaphore for rampant, uncontrolled consumerism, then the zombies are already risen, and the apocalypse is here!(put the sword down proteinshakez)
    isnt ireland full of zombie banks already. the fuckers that want decapitating are the bankers that have fucked up my country
    i recon nerve gas would work on zombie brains, and failing that herd them to the meat factories like cattle and let the profesionals despatch them
    do zombies freeze solid in sub zero conditions. wait till winter or lure them into the big industrial meat lockers
    **** boy we got these fuckers whiped
  10. Bad Apple is offline

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    Posted On:
    5/16/2011 8:45pm


     

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by kcvmac View Post
    Best anti-zombie martial art? Parkour.
    GTFO-fu.

    This is prolly the smartest one yet. Surviving the necropocalypse will depend largely on mobility. Not firepower, not fortification but mostly running away like a little girl. Striking and grappling a zombie is just begging for fluid transfer opportunities. Even smashing skulls in with a bat is risky if you're not wearing a full body condom.

    Swords ? I'd rather have a crowbar any day. That "sword" you bought off QVC is just an oversized decorative knife. The metallurgy is all wrong and even if you got a "for realz" sword you still can't use it to pry open a door.

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