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December is Red Gi Month
Break out the red gi, grow a beard, and stuff yourself with yams and cranberry sauce; it's somewhat-officially the Holiday Season! And you know what that means, right?
That's right, IT'S Red Gi CHEAT MONTH. Whereas some people have a cheat meal, or even a cheat day, in the great Bullshido tradition of doing everything full contact, why half-ass it? Have that extra slice of apple pie; hell, have the entire damn pie! Still have leftovers from Thanksgiving? Have so many turkey sandwiches the tryptophan could KO a horse; eat one of those too. Pour gravy over everything.
Roy Nelson's got nothing on Bullshido in December.
But here's the catch... (you knew this was coming, right?): if you're going to do this, you'd better be training just as hard as you're eating. Hit the gym twice a day, or if you're a cubicle drone who can't, do a few sets of elevated pushups off your desk. And if anyone at the office looks at you funny, eat them too. Lift BIG. None of those sissy curls or gimping around on the Nautilus machines. Kick the frat boy in the straight brimmed ball cap and Tapout doucheshirt, out of the squat rack and toss as many 45s as you can handle on the bar. Squat til you puke, then while you're bent over retching, deadlift the puke-covered bar.
After you're done at the gym, get your ass on the mat. You'll still have plenty of energy for sparring given that you're taking in more carbs than the entire nation of Somalia. That red gi? Yeah, that's so you can just mop up the blood (and other body fluids) by sprawling. Which you should do. Two hundred times before 8 AM.
By the end of December if you haven't gained 10 lbs of muscle, a few scars, and a whole new appreciation for keeping your diet in check, we're going to make sure Santa's reindeer all drop a special present down your chimney.
Get busy. Remember, if you cheat on Red Gi CHEAT MONTH then you're only cheating yourself.