The Ultimate Fighter - Heavyweights - Semifinals

**Cuchulain** · Posted On: 12/04/2009 5:23am

Gah! Can't believe people are still not impressed by Nelson. Did you see McSweeney after the fight? He wasn't in that state before he went to the ground so all that was from the solid punches from the cucifix. The guy makes his opponent defenceless in his fights and pounds them out, what's the problem?

I'm glad McSweeney got beat down. I've never seen worse stand-up from an MMA fighter who considers that to be his speciality. That and he's a prick. I was elated when Nelson landed that right hand after the showboating.

**Scott Larson** · Posted On: 12/04/2009 9:03am

Originally Posted by eyebeams

I want Roy Nelson to do the crucifix/arm punch combo. I want boos to echo through the arena as Big Country flops, walrus-like, into side control and only does the minimum amount of work required to win the finale. I will relish the weeping and gnashing of teeth from Zuffa's marketing department as Nelson belly-flops his way up a HW division that is now deprived of Lesnar's mix of freakish physical attributes, explosive wrestling and crossover star power in favour of some dude with an patchy beard and asymmetric haircut who, in a paradox worthy of contemplation, trains hard to effectively use sloth in the ring. Before Nelson, watching a gut-heavy man languidly, skillfully pin a fit younger man was a fetish. Now it will be a t-shirt design.

Striking with the agility of a cooked ham on a pogo stick, felling his enemies like so many double Whoppers, and using their superior physiques as mere beer-belly pillows, Big Country will become the pear shaped SCOURGE of the UFC. Ratings will fall. Dana will come to Fedor on bended knee asking him to crush the man whose jiggling torso slithers sweatily over MMA, covering everything in a salty slick of embarrassment. Dare the Russian risk suffocation in the pasty, hairy navel of a stomach that has enveloped other warriors? DARE HE?

Now this is a fine piece of writing. Thank you.

**UpaLumpa** · Posted On: 12/04/2009 9:57am

Originally Posted by eyebeams

Striking with the agility of a cooked ham on a pogo stick

I'm unclear on whether this very nice phrase is complimentary or not.

**galois** · Posted On: 12/04/2009 11:27am

Originally Posted by eyebeams

...Ratings will fall. Dana will come to Fedor on bended knee asking him to crush the man whose jiggling torso slithers sweatily over MMA, covering everything in a salty slick of embarrassment. Dare the Russian risk suffocation in the pasty, hairy navel of a stomach that has enveloped other warriors? DARE HE?

It comes to something when Fedor is the chiseled adonis figure in the ring.