Self defense for women, a few concerns

**Yoj** · Posted On: 10/09/2009 4:43pm

Some self defence classes are ****, but not all, the ones I've helped teach were 50% verbal, and related to not getting into situations, and de-escalating them when they happened. Thats more important than any technique or skill, alive or otherwise.

**ciscodog** · Posted On: 10/09/2009 4:55pm

well lets examine what you just said...if the guy has both your hands then kicking him might be useful. How did he get your hands to begin with? Your sparring with your brother on a rape scenario sounds weird but ok.....and lets face it, if the first thing you did was to claw his face/eyes as he took you down the attack would stop there. Your not trying to really blind him, thats why he can continue to try to get a dominant position. If he does have your armed pinned above you or off to the side those cheesy wrist escapes by circling your arms/wrists work very well to get a hand free. If blinding your attacker is not effective, then what is?

**Osaka peach** · Posted On: 10/09/2009 4:59pm

Exactly :) Avoiding getting into a bad situation is the most important part by far. While I enjoy practicing JKD for the benefits and the fun, never would I want to fight for my life on the street. I just don't know for sure if I would be emotionally able to face such a situation. No matter how skilled technically I might become, all that is for nothing if I'm frozen with fear. So avoidance works best :)

**1point2** · Posted On: 10/09/2009 5:03pm

Competitions help with learning to manage fear.

**Osaka peach** · Posted On: 10/09/2009 5:04pm

Originally Posted by ciscodog

well lets examine what you just said...if the guy has both your hands then kicking him might be useful. How did he get your hands to begin with? Your sparring with your brother on a rape scenario sounds weird but ok.....and lets face it, if the first thing you did was to claw his face/eyes as he took you down the attack would stop there. Your not trying to really blind him, thats why he can continue to try to get a dominant position. If he does have your armed pinned above you or off to the side those cheesy wrist escapes by circling your arms/wrists work very well to get a hand free. If blinding your attacker is not effective, then what is?

I've been sparring with my brother and my uncle since I was little so it's not strange to me :)

of course it would be useful to claw at his eyes, but how can I be sure it will work for real, I mean, I can't claw at my sparring partner eyes for real. So I won't know for sure how any eye attack or groin attack or knee attack or the such will end up in a real situation. Maybe I'm just overanylizing things also lol ;)

**Lominus** · Posted On: 10/09/2009 5:12pm

Confidence, learning to manage adrenaline dump, and not having the body language of a victim can go a long way.

**Blue Negation** · Posted On: 10/09/2009 5:43pm

Originally Posted by Osaka peach

Mad cat attacks, as you call them, can certainly be effective to a certain extent :) But when my brother and I spar (he is a shotokan karate stylist) we sometimes work on the sexual assault scenario, and unfortunately if he can get into a position where his is over me and holding my hands to the ground, I just can't do anything. I've thought about headbutting but I can't get enough power from this position, and since my hands are immobilized to the ground (I can't shake him off, he's just too strong) I can't claw at his face either. That's why I'm considering BJJ training since it would probably teach me how to maneuver on the ground against a stronger person, not really for the purpose of applying a submission hold but above all to learn how to simply get out of such a situation, get up on my feet and run for it.

You have exactly the right take on it. Congratulations on keeping a level head.

Relying on eye strikes, especially when you're being taken down (LAUGH OUT FUCKING LOUD) as a defense is laughable. Solid body mechanics is the answer, and you'll find that in BJJ or wrestling or sambo or judo or whatever.

**Larus marinus** · Posted On: 10/09/2009 5:51pm

Originally Posted by Osaka peach

I've been sparring with my brother and my uncle since I was little so it's not strange to me :)

of course it would be useful to claw at his eyes, but how can I be sure it will work for real, I mean, I can't claw at my sparring partner eyes for real. So I won't know for sure how any eye attack or groin attack or knee attack or the such will end up in a real situation. Maybe I'm just overanylizing things also lol ;)

I feel that it's a mistake to assume that any move you've learned will definitely be effective in a Real Fight - after all, there are guys out there who are for want of a better term, 'complete fucking headcases'. In my time working in bars, I've seen people getting booted hard in the balls, take a broken glass to the face or brayed full in the head/throat with a pool cue and continue fighting, seemingly completely unfazed by it, aside from being made much angrier. Hell, one guy smashed the man he was fighting right in the face with a crowbar, flattening his nose and pushing his upper teeth down through his lips, leaving bits of flesh hanging loose and it didn't stop him (finally took four bouncers to hold him down until the police/ambulance arrived).

Always have alternatives ready.

EDIT: Of course, if you've sparred alive and full-contact, you'll have a better idea of what's more likely to be effective.

**Monkfg** · Posted On: 10/11/2009 6:51am

Self defense for women is aiming to make them feel strong and confident. Women feeling strong are less likely to be the victim of violence. The placebo effect is still an effect.

**permahudef** · Posted On: 10/11/2009 11:21am

Originally Posted by Monkfg

Self defense for women is aiming to make them feel strong and confident. Women feeling strong are less likely to be the victim of violence. The placebo effect is still an effect.

Well, given the exact same situation, maybe. I think a problem the OP (and a few others) are pointing out is that the feeling strong will let the women allow themselves get into more dangerous situations whereas women without the (false) sense of security will be more mindful to avoid those situations.

Even before I started training MA, I had female relatives/friends who would talk about women's self-defense moves. I was also ignorant to MA (as a kid/teen), so I wanted to see the moves. I knew something was up when they said "No, you're not grabbing me correctly, you have to do it like this...okay not so tight..."

Trying to tell someone how to escape/survive/(win?) a violent encounter without proper training is like trying to tell someone how to survive a storm at sea without a floatation device without teaching them how to swim.