Thanks To Bullshido...

**RondyR** · Posted On: 7/29/2009 11:04am

Originally Posted by DarkAardvark

nice! youre in harford? thats a good 30 min drive for me. i can haz blackbelt? :D

Of course! I'll even certify you to open your own school!

**DarkAardvark** · Posted On: 7/29/2009 12:07pm

Originally Posted by RondyR

Of course! I'll even certify you to open your own school!

awesome! now i can have my own kumite! now... to find the perfect outfit...

**RondyR** · Posted On: 7/29/2009 1:00pm

Originally Posted by DarkAardvark

awesome! now i can have my own kumite! now... to find the perfect outfit...

One word - Epic Win. Wait, that's two words. ****.

**MrJ** · Posted On: 7/29/2009 1:24pm

You need a website which is filled with accolades and achievements from the most reputable of martial arts organizations and learned societies listing all ranks obtained, degrees earned and professional certifications held so we may fully behold the awesomeness. With Paypal. A biography which borrows some symbolism and themes from the official biography of Kim Il Sung would be a bonus.

**DarkAardvark** · Posted On: 7/29/2009 1:37pm

Originally Posted by MrJ

You need a website which is filled with accolades and achievements from the most reputable of martial arts organizations and learned societies listing all ranks obtained, degrees earned and professional certifications held so we may fully behold the awesomeness. With Paypal. A biography which borrows some symbolism and themes from the official biography of Kim Il Sung would be a bonus.

alright, ill get on that once i leave work (if i dont fall asleep the moment i get home)

**RondyR** · Posted On: 7/29/2009 1:42pm

Originally Posted by MrJ

You need a website which is filled with accolades and achievements from the most reputable of martial arts organizations and learned societies listing all ranks obtained, degrees earned and professional certifications held so we may fully behold the awesomeness. With Paypal. A biography which borrows some symbolism and themes from the official biography of Kim Il Sung would be a bonus.

**** man, that's far too complicated for me. The interwebz causes butthurt for me; I not the most computer literate/interwebz savvy guy.

**wingchunx2z** · Posted On: 7/29/2009 2:55pm

Originally Posted by RondyR

...I have decided that I will start my own Martial Arts school. I shall train students in the mystical ways of Ninjer/BJJ/GJJ/KKK/Ke?po/Krav/ShadowyShit/FlaccidPenis/Gongfu/Karate-TKD-Do. My title shall be Grandmaster-Sensei-Shi Fu-Soke-Jackass-136th Dan Rondy.

My qualifications:
I am 31 years old.

A Professional Fighting Record of 165,432 wins - 0 losses.

My Black Belts - BB Judo, BB BJJ, BB Ninjer, BB Karate-Do, Black Sash Shaolin Style Wing Chun Drunken Master Fu. And I am the proud owner of a true, 100% certified BB from Radford "Assuma Kimber" Davis AND a BB from SWAN Ninjer-idiot-su.

I have personally whipped the **** out of Bruce Lee, Jackie Chan, Van Damne, the mighty AH-NOLD, I have made the entire Gracie family my bitch, and I am the only man that was able to kick Chuck Norris so hard that his granite beard shattered. I also went back in time and personally beat the **** out of Guan Yu and ripped his beard off. *****.

My Military Experience - LARP, USMC, Vietnam War. US Army, WWII, the Big Red One. Hitler didn't commit suicide because the Russkies were on his ass, he killed himself because he heard I was coming for him. Also, I fought on behalf of the Confederacy during the War of the States, commonly called the Civil War. And yes, it is true that Grant was one shitty drunk. I'm also a former Navy SeAL, a Delta Force Operator, a USMC Force Recon/Scout Sniper and a Green Beret. Plus I helped the Jews do 9-11.

I have a 14" cock, flaccid, and when I am erect it measures an amazing 21". I have banged over 4,000 hot ass women. Would you like to come back to my place bouncy bouncy? I am no longer infected. Please remove your panties Sir William, I cannot wait until lunch time.

I am so fucking hard-core and bad ass that the entire crew of Bullshido.net is not worthy to kiss my foot.

My Training Facilities - I own a $$$424 BILLION dollar training center - I own Long Island, New York.

Special Skills - Thanks to my hero Radford I have learned how to turn invisible (which helped in my pursuit of the 4,000 chicks I nailed), I can put my fist through THREE layers of bulletproof glass JUST BY FUCKING THINKING ABOUT IT (so blow me Fraud Dux) AND I can bench press a Mack truck. I spent 30 years training at the Shaolin Temple in China and another 20 years training as a Ninjer-Samurai hybrid by Grandmaster SomenameIcan'tspell in Japan.

My Special Challenge - For the low fee of $1,500,000 I will fight anyone to prove my skills. I win automatically if I touch you...because my super deadly Dim Mak will pwn your ass. You are responsible for the cost of any (read: numerous) injuries I recieve during said fight and require hospitalization for. If you make me cry like a bitch my Jew lawyer will butthurt you. Which reminds me - Surprise Buttsecks, the best thing you didn't know you needed.

Black Belt Program - For only $32,000 I will send you your own authentic, totally legit Black Belt that every other Martial Artist in the world would pop a boner over. Really, it's that cool. Don't mind the white stains on the belt, my mom spilled some mayo on it. Really, mayo, it's not my spooge.

If at any time I am investigated by any members or affiliates of Bullshido.net and labled a fraud I will claim that the Jews made me do it.

Anyway, I know I'm the new puppy around here but I think I'm starting to get the grasp on how McDojo's and their Bullshido works. So thanks guys!

Oh, and every fucking time I see that avatar pic with Obi Won (or however it's spelled) 'Force-Pushing' the baby over I giggle. I think there may be a screw loose in my noggin.

be that as it may, I will still chain punch you.