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  1. #1
    DdlR's Avatar
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    Apr 2005
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    4,853
    Style
    Bartitsu
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    "Your mileage may vary": MA legal disclaimer thread

    This is spun off by popular demand from another thread.

    Post the legal disclaimers you'd want to see prominently displayed on the martial art/martial arts school/personality/movie/product/etc. of your choice. Bonus points for being funny while at least making an effort to use legalese.

  2. #2
    tharuz's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2008
    Location
    Behind you
    Posts
    1,486
    Style
    None.
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Martial arts instructors are not liable for any claims on their part.

    A Black Belt is not a certificate immunity.

    We do not guarantee that your child will be any less whiny after achieving his black belt.

  3. #3

    Join Date
    Dec 2006
    Posts
    814
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Trio Martial Arts:

    Training with us does not guarantee any level of protection on da street. Students of "sensei" Brett may be tagged permanently as "douchebags" with or without their knowledge by the rest of the martial arts community. Trio Martial Arts makes no warranty against random acts of humor, mockery, humiliation, shame and / or ass-kickery received resulting from your study of the martial arts that we made up.

    Thank you and we wish you the best.

    HIYAH!

    http://www.triomartialarts.com/index.php?content=main

  4. #4
    ZenOfAnger's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    St. louis, MO
    Posts
    1,304
    Style
    Judo+soon 2b bjj,boxing
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I'll start this off.


    Ninjutsu Outfit (any color):



    * Does not allow the wearer to vanish into the ninja dimension to escape pirate attacks.

    * Must not be worn for a drivers license photo.

    * Does not make you invisible to the naked eye, nor does it give you awesome powers.

    * Is only intended for LARPing and those too ugly to be seen without a ninja-hood.

    * Does not dictate fighting skill, or any skill for that matter.

    * Will cause retardary which may be fatal.

    * Makes you eligible for a serious beating in real life.

    * Makes you my bitch.

  5. #5
    Fasten your seat belts, and prepare for lift off
    DKJr's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2007
    Location
    Richmond, VA
    Posts
    3,214
    Style
    Combat Cuddling
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    WARNING prolonged exposure to Bujikan Taijitsu has been shown to produce larping and cause testicular shrinkage in lab rats.

  6. #6

    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    Atlanta, GA
    Posts
    336
    Style
    TKD, Wrestling (retired)
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    DISCLAIMER: We're not mathematicians, but there is roughly a 110% chance we will not understand the fundamentals of grappling.

    Signed - any TKD school

  7. #7

    Join Date
    Mar 2008
    Location
    Cincy, Ohio
    Posts
    938
    Style
    TKD, judo, MT noob
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    gracie ju jitsu (tm) is not responsible for any or all homosexual feelings you may or not feel while grappling. Remember, its only gay if you make eye contact.

  8. #8

    Join Date
    Aug 2007
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    92
    Style
    Physical Therapy 4 Ankle
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Warning Bullshido has had reported side effects of dojo storming, fake claim call outs, ninja bashing, and rectal leakage.

    Only use Bullshido as directed.

  9. #9
    TheRuss's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Not Canada
    Posts
    4,334
    Style
    None
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    WARNING: Do not apply directly to street.

    NOTICE: Knowing kung fu will not get you a kiss from Monica Bellucci.

    LIMITED WARRANTY: This black belt is guaranteed to hold your pants up. Other uses are at bearer's own risk.

    FINE PRINT: Wire team, fight choreographer, and computer-generated imagery sold separately.

  10. #10

    Join Date
    Apr 2008
    Location
    Atlanta, GA
    Posts
    336
    Style
    TKD, Wrestling (retired)
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    WARNING: Archaic weapons and hokey religions are no substitute for a good blaster at your side.

    (Okay, so I didn't make that one up personally, but it seemed to fit the thread.)

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