Thread: Bullshido Digest Monthly
7/03/2008 3:47pm, #31
Good evening. Today is Thursday, July the 3rd, and this is my last broadcast. Yesterday I announced on this program that I was going to commit public suicide, admittedly an act of madness. Well, I'll tell you what happened: I just ran out of bullshit. Am I still on the air? I really don't know any other way to say it other than I just ran out of bullshit. Bullshit is all the reasons we give for living. And if we can't think up any reasons of our own, we always have the God bullshit. We don't know why we're going through all this pointless pain, humiliation, decays, so there better be someone somewhere who does know. That's the God bullshit. And then, there's the noble man bullshit; that man is a noble creature that can order his own world; who needs God? Well, if there's anybody out there that can look around this demented slaughterhouse of a world we live in and tell me that man is a noble creature, believe me: That man is full of bullshit. I don't have anything going for me. I haven't got any kids. And I was married for thirty-three years of shrill, shrieking fraud. So I don't have any bullshit left. I just ran out of it, you see. Good night.
7/03/2008 4:18pm, #32
I <3 Virus
Originally Posted by Virus
Hell, that's going into my sig.GUIZ THIS IS LIEK MY SIGNACHOOR LOLOL
7/03/2008 4:29pm, #33
I didn't put that thumbnail pic in my post.
7/04/2008 4:50pm, #34
7/04/2008 5:52pm, #35Originally Posted by Virus
Traditional Martial Arts and Styles: June Coverage
Drunken Style: Forced into the 21st Century Kicking and Screaming.
Several new Wushu LARPers contended this month that "Drunken Style" is a legitimate style of martial art. For those who don't know, there is no historical evidence for the existence of an actual "Drunken Style" of Chinese Martial Arts.
Thanks to the efforts of [I]It is Fake[/"]No BS Martial Arts - View Profile: It is Fake@@AMEPARAM@@View Profile: It is Fake</title>@@AMEPARAM@@It is Fakeand, to an extent, No BS Martial Arts - View Profile: MrBadGuy@@AMEPARAM@@View Profile: MrBadGuy</title>@@AMEPARAM@@MrBadGuy , the attack of revisionist historian noobs was routed into the Gulf of Logic.
Still going strong, but we're seeing more activity in the extra-chun sectors.
Tae Kwon Do Fights its Way Back to the Top, One Person out of Millions at a Time.
A cargo load of Cognitive Dissonance juiceboxes was accidentally shipped to the WTF and ATA headquarters. As a result, several TKD noobs have approached the forums with the same old, sparse, full contact TKD videos. When they discovered that one school's training did not improve their own school's training through the fabled "TMA Quantum Mirror Effect" they promptly fled the scene to MAP.
Judo and Aikido: a New Horizon
Judoka have begun supplementing their training with grappling and throwing techniques. Aikidoka have begun supplementing their training with Kalishnikov-47-Do.
Last edited by NJM; 7/04/2008 5:54pm at .
7/04/2008 8:46pm, #36Originally Posted by NJM
I don't care much for the "drunken style" and "lineage wars" sections, they don't seem to contain any "joke" of any sort. "lineage wars" isn't even an article, it's just one sentence, not that that's bad in itself but there's no leadup and punchline.
The "TKD fights" bit shows some promise. You've got some decent material like the "TMA quantum mirror effect" gag but I don't feel the setup is that good. You're writing from too-critical an angle. It's good that you recognize that t3h funn3h can heavily rely on putting someone down, but it's better to write as though you are just stating the "facts" but then throw something out that forces the reader to fill-in-the-gap that you're putting someone down.
I don't know if you picked up on it, but most of my articles took their cue from specific discussions that actually happened on the forums. This means that people who are familiar with the original text will get the joke a bit more.
"Judo and aikido" sorry but I don't really get the gag about judoka doing grappling and throwing. Please don't use any "-do" or "-fu" jokes. (especially "gun"-fu tee-hee) They are really unsophisticated and lame, and you'd have to do something really special with them to make them work.
7/04/2008 10:03pm, #37
Nice. I'll keep those tips in mind.
7/05/2008 9:21am, #38
7/05/2008 1:45pm, #39Originally Posted by ShrekBJJ
Also, he had more then just Karate.
Also, blow me, i don't see you fighting.
Also, Prolific? Awesome!
PROOF that I'm not a completely useless poster:
Originally Posted by Cy Q. Faunce