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  1. JingMerchant! is offline
    JingMerchant!'s Avatar

    ...has all your Jing.

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    Feb 2007
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    North Blighty.
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    2,007

    Posted On:
    6/03/2008 10:00am


     Style: Judo, baby! Yeah!

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    MOAR STORIES ABOUT BADDASS GRANDPA!!!
  2. Yohan is offline

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    Huntsville, AL
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    Posted On:
    6/03/2008 10:29am


     Style: JKD

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by E-Van
    This weekend I had to make a trip to visit my grandparents in Eureka CA and spend some quality time with them. One of the things they enjoy is a early dinner and then some good ol Larry King. Well, on Saturday night I explained to them that there was a special event taking place on local television. So I grabbed my grandfather and I a vodka grapefruit and witched the teley to the EliteXC fight. Hillarity insued.

    At first the previews started and showed some fighter highlights. I was cringing a bit knowing that my Grandmother did not approve at ALL. I have been doing martial arts my whole life, wrestling, TKD (I remember when she always called it Taiwan Do when I was a kid and I used to get pissed) then Karate, and most recently MMA. After one grueling tournement at my dojo I sent her some pictures of me before and after the 9x3 minute rounds of competition, with her only grandsons face black and blue. She demanded I stop training.

    So here we are in the family room, my grandpa and I a few sheets to the wind, and my grandmother looking at me criticaly after the first fight. "Is this what you do Eric? This is barbaric! I think its the popularity of things like this and the internet that are causing all these kids to get in fights in school!" I just shrug and say "maybe" but its my Grandpa that actualy defends MMA!

    "Men have been boxing for hundreds of years damn it! Its what we do. The greeks used to fight just like this.. to a crowd twice this size. Its all these damn Liberal parents blaming everything but themselves for there damn disrepectfull kids."

    Did I tell you I love my Grandpa?

    So next is the Gina Kaitlyn fight and my Grandmother can barely watch. She is insensed at this point, and when the fight is stopped, and she looks at Kaitlyns face (wich was pretty brutal) she actualy gets up and says "Tomorrow I am writing this station. This is not appropriate for television." and she leaves the room. I realy cant defend it. My grandparents are old school, they would never understand that these are athletes who are testing themselves. Its not barbaric. How would I ever explai..

    "Hell I dont think its barbaric son" says my grandpa (who has always called me son, and is the only man alive that could get away with it)

    "You dont?"

    "Hell no. You know I trained in martial arts? You know whata bayonet is?"

    "well yah of course. On the end of your rifle"

    "Thats right. They taught us how to take out Japs with those. You know that right? How to gut em before you blew em away" He has obviously had a bit to drink at this point because he never talks about the war when he is sober. He then gets up and puts his drink down and assumes the position of a soldier stabbing his bayonet and a enemy he must still see in his eyes.

    At this time I explain the phenom that is Kimbo Slice to my grandfather as the comercials end and the main event starts.

    "Holy smokes thats one big black man"

    "Yah you could say that" I chuckle "You think that other guy stands a chance grandpa?"

    he looks at me for a bit and then says, "Well hell. Hes gota chance of whinning the lottery too right? Why dont you mix us another one and lets see who wins this. I got 7up."

    "What? 7up? In your drink"

    "No" he laughs "I got Kimbo 7up to win"

    I love my grandpa.
    Nice post - good read.
  3. DerAuslander is offline
    DerAuslander's Avatar

    Valiant Monk of Booze & War

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    Baltimore, MD
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    Posted On:
    6/03/2008 10:34am

    supporting memberstaff
     Style: BJJ/C-JKD/KAAALIII!!!!!!!

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    *Monk slaps Yohan*
  4. Yohan is offline

    Registered Member

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    Posted On:
    6/03/2008 11:24am


     Style: JKD

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Teh El Macho
    How do middle sex?
    That's where you do her belly button.
  5. The Question is offline
    The Question's Avatar

    Octopussy!

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    Mar 2007
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    Posted On:
    6/03/2008 11:38am

    Join us... or die
     Style: Striking/Grappling/Poking

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Yohan
    That's where you do her belly button.
    How do you make it fit?

    Wait.

    Dude, you gotta stop fucking those alien chicks, man. It's a slippery slope.
    Quote Originally Posted by Goju - joe
    being a dick with skill is only marginally better than being a dick without skill.
  6. 3moose1 is offline
    3moose1's Avatar

    United States Marine.

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    San Clemente
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    Posted On:
    6/03/2008 11:39am

    Join us... or die
     Style: MCMAP, BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by The Question
    How do you make it fit?
    He just has an incredibly small penis.

    PROOF that I'm not a completely useless poster:
    http://www.bullshido.net/forums/show...0&postcount=58


    Quote Originally Posted by Cy Q. Faunce
    3moose1 is correct. Sig THAT, you fucker.

    Quote Originally Posted by sochin101 View Post
    I went out with a delightful young woman who was on a regimen of pills that made her taste of burned onions.
    That is not conducive to passionate cunnilingus, my friend, let me assure you.
    Quote Originally Posted by HappyOldGuy View Post
    I agree with moosey
  7. Snake Plissken is offline
    Snake Plissken's Avatar

    When I Get Back

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    Posted On:
    6/03/2008 11:41am

    supporting member
     

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by 3moose1
    He just has an incredibly small penis.
    He was asking Yohan, not you.....acorn.
  8. 3moose1 is offline
    3moose1's Avatar

    United States Marine.

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    Posted On:
    6/03/2008 11:44am

    Join us... or die
     Style: MCMAP, BJJ

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Johnny Utah
    He was asking Yohan, not you.....acorn.

    Of course he wasn't.

    My junk is seriously unbelievably large.

    Like your mother...

    PROOF that I'm not a completely useless poster:
    http://www.bullshido.net/forums/show...0&postcount=58


    Quote Originally Posted by Cy Q. Faunce
    3moose1 is correct. Sig THAT, you fucker.

    Quote Originally Posted by sochin101 View Post
    I went out with a delightful young woman who was on a regimen of pills that made her taste of burned onions.
    That is not conducive to passionate cunnilingus, my friend, let me assure you.
    Quote Originally Posted by HappyOldGuy View Post
    I agree with moosey
  9. Snake Plissken is offline
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    When I Get Back

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    Posted On:
    6/03/2008 12:06pm

    supporting member
     

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by 3moose1
    My junk is seriously unbelievably large.

    Like your mother...
    Yes, much like my mother, your junk is "unbelievable" to the point of nonexistance.
  10. E-Van is offline
    E-Van's Avatar

    Senior Member

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    Nov 2007
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    California
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    Posted On:
    6/03/2008 12:12pm


     Style: bjj

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Hey mother fuckers. This thread is about kick ass grandpas. Not your little wee wees!
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