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  1. Lily is offline
    Lily's Avatar

    Weak

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    Posted On:
    12/09/2007 3:00am

    Join us... or die
     Style: No longer training

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Of course there is. Within a second of anti-social behaviour we have to make a decision as to whether we a) ignore b) speak up in a civil manner c) verbally abuse d) physically challenge the offender etc.. We also take into account the environment we are in etc.

    I'm pretty much up to my head with the totally unprovoked behaviour I get on occassion. I can see how a reaction of ignoring (and other soft approaches) may become unsatisfactory after a while. If I don't say/do something about a behaviour then that person is going to do it to others and eventually he/she too may be encouraged by the lack of response to increase the bad behaviour. Someone has to put their foot down at some point.
  2. Steve is offline
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    The gift that keeps on giving

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    Posted On:
    12/09/2007 3:02am

    supporting member
     Style: On hiatus

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Lily
    I'm pretty close to that line these days when it comes to strangers and crude behaviour. I don't see why we should 'just ignore the behaviour and walk away' (as I've been advised on many occassions).
    If you're saying "crude" and meaning "drunk" than yes, sometimes it's better to walk away.

    It's obvious that the "bad guys" were really drunk, they were in a bar (as mentioned by the author). An excuse for their behavior? Not at all.
  3. sheol1980 is offline

    Registered Member

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    Posted On:
    12/09/2007 3:08am


     Style: Fencing, Sword play, MMA

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Lily
    Of course there is. Within a second of anti-social behaviour we have to make a decision as to whether we a) ignore b) speak up in a civil manner c) verbally abuse d) physically challenge the offender etc.. We also take into account the environment we are in etc.

    I'm pretty much up to my head with the totally unprovoked behaviour I get on occassion. I can see how a reaction of ignoring (and other soft approaches) may become unsatisfactory after a while. If I don't say/do something about a behaviour then that person is going to do it to others and eventually he/she too may be encouraged by the lack of response to increase the bad behaviour. Someone has to put their foot down at some point.
    True, but agressive generosity toward the person may end the confrontation even more rapidly, and is likely to force an even greater degree of self reflection on their part. I cannot imagine how one would do so in the situatuion listed, and I certainly am opposed to any kind of cowtowing to rudness. So I actually don't know, it just seems like conflict resolution and mediation is a skill one aught to pursue, especially a martial artist.
  4. andrewa is offline

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    Posted On:
    12/09/2007 3:09am


     Style: Grappling

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    A rational person may act at times as an asshole but when it's pointed out to them in a polite and straightforward manner will cease and desist (or modify) their behavior. A true asshole sees any attempt to restrict their behavior, no matter how egregious, as some sort of grave personal affront and continues or escalates their 'assholic' activities.
  5. sheol1980 is offline

    Registered Member

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    Posted On:
    12/09/2007 3:22am


     Style: Fencing, Sword play, MMA

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by andrewa
    A rational person may act at times as an asshole but when it's pointed out to them in a polite and straightforward manner will cease and desist (or modify) their behavior. A true asshole sees any attempt to restrict their behavior, no matter how egregious, as some sort of grave personal affront and continues or escalates their 'assholic' activities.
    In that case it seems like the best thing is calmly to point out the problem until they decide to attacj you... in fact I suppose that sort of thing is how I got in most of the fights I've been in.
  6. DAYoung is offline
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    Crouching Philosopher, Hidden Philosopher

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    Posted On:
    12/09/2007 3:55am

    supporting member
     Style: n/a (ex-Karate)

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Nice one, Mav.

    I had a very similar thought on Friday, at a bus stop.

    An insane, muscle-bound, tattooed thug got out of his expensive car in mid-traffic (small child still strapped into the passenger seat), and said: "WHAT THE **** YOU LOOKIN' AT? YOU ALL LOOKIN'? I'LL FUCKEN' KILL YOU CUNTS. YOU WANT ME TO FUCKEN' SMASH YOU? DON'T FUCKEN' LOOK AT ME. MIND YOUR OWN BUSINESS, CUNTS." He then feigned to swing at me, and I flinched like a big sook.

    Part of me was thinking: 'If I get hit hard enough in the head, my spinal injury might leave me paralysed. Please don't hit me.' Part of me was thinking: 'Osoto-gari.'

    Guess which part prevailed?
    Martial Arts and Philosophy: Beating and Nothingness
    click here to order on Amazon

  7. DerAuslander is offline
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    Valiant Monk of Booze & War

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    Posted On:
    12/09/2007 12:13pm

    supporting memberstaff
     Style: BJJ/C-JKD/KAAALIII!!!!!!!

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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I don't think he actually hit the hippy.

    He dragged him outside (remember the old days?) and it seems the hippy figured out he was going to be thrashed and regretted it.
  8. Snake Plissken is offline
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    When I Get Back

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    Posted On:
    12/09/2007 1:24pm

    supporting member
     

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    is this the same article that was in Esqiure?

    this article just underlines the point that many people believe the rules apply to everyone but them.

    and I hope he beat the living **** out of that annoying clapping hippy.
  9. andrewa is offline

    Registered Member

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    Posted On:
    12/09/2007 1:32pm


     Style: Grappling

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Sandy Claws
    is this the same article that was in Esqiure?
    Yes, if you google 'In Defense of the Fistfight' it brings you to the Esquire website.
  10. IndoChinese is offline

    AKAKTK

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    angola, ny
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    Posted On:
    12/09/2007 1:53pm


     Style: Liu Seong Gung Fu

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    If I don't say/do something about a behaviour then that person is going to do it to others and eventually he/she too may be encouraged by the lack of response to increase the bad behaviour. Someone has to put their foot down at some point.
    like my momma always said, "People treat you the way you let them!".

    if you push far enough into someone's personal space, you can expect some instant karma, as they will become the 'divine agent' themselves.
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