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  1. #11
    Guess which finger is the fickle one... supporting member
    FickleFingerOfFate's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by M1K3
    I don't know the doctor that well. What do you think?

    Nasal, definitely.:confused3
    If you can't laugh at yourself,
    Others will be happy to do it for you. :evil6:

    The 2 most abundant elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.



  2. #12
    Snake Plissken's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by KhorneliusPraxx
    Pubic?
    merkin

  3. #13
    Virus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jkdbuck76
    Dear Mr. Virus:

    I noticed that this month is Wing Chun Sucks month.

    Does this also mean that Ving Tsun, Wing Tsun, and Wing Tsun and
    Ving Tsun Keun also suck?

    If so, then why?

    Also, if Ip Man d34dlier than anthrax?

    Sincerely,


    ChiSao in Chi Town
    Any of the Vings are OK, but stay away from any Wings. You see the wings teach you to stand like this:



    I mean, look at the fucking rubbish. Who ever pulls **** like that in a fight?

    Whereas the Vings teach this:



    Now that's what I call a fighting posture! Look at the stability, the mobility and how all angles of possible attack are covered. Not only that it's a great conditioning exercise and a new study just came out which confirms that three minutes in this stance is better and developing leg strength than 30 squats at 3x your bodyweight.

    As the saying goes; Once you've had Ving, you never go Wing.

  4. #14
    Virus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by FickleFingerOfFate
    Dear Learned Virus;

    If Chi Sao is _ing _un's Sparring,

    Should girls who play 'pattycake' on the Playground be Suspended from School for Fighting?

    Signed,

    Motor City Misanthrope
    Chi sao is not actually fighting, it's for developing principles that apply to fighting. I don't really know what that means but it seems to sound convincing to my students. We can also conclude that pattycake will also impart some important fighting principles, while not actually fighting.

    I mean, boxers do pushups and you don't get on the ground and do pushups in a fight. Should we suspend kids for doing pushups during recess?

  5. #15
    Virus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vince Tortelli
    Dear Virus,
    I do wing chun, but I am having trouble because the molten lava and huge mounds of broken glass and needles that cover the streets in my hometown make walking and driving anywhere impossible. Do you have any advice for me?
    Sincerely,
    Streets is Sirius Bidness
    You BJJ shrimping to travel everywhere.

  6. #16
    Virus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by M1K3
    Dear Mr Virus, Sir,

    I have seen pictures of the great Ip Man and of Helio Gracie. I believe they are actually brothers who were separated at birth. Obviously Helio was taken from Hong Kong and forced to learn some heathen primitive sweaty man hugging. Couldn’t this mean that BJJ is really the true Wing Chun anti-grapple?

    Also could you make that mean FickleFingerOfFate leave me alone? Oh how I hate him. Thank you so much.

    Your humble servant,

    GGBoxer
    Helio was taken down by kimura like a little bitch whereas Ip man would be rooted due to the stability of the _ing _un stance. That rules out any family relation.

    Oh, and Ip Man was Chinese.

  7. #17
    Virus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by RunningDog
    Dear virus, my Shifood says that my tan sao should dissolve a boxer's hooks, but my friend who's a really shitty boxer keeps hooking me hard in the face, I think my tan sao must be wrong. What should I do?
    _ing _un must be understood as a concepts based art. I keep telling my students that after they come to training with black eyes and broken arms from fighting. Boxing is great for getting good at "punching" and "avoiding punches" really quickly, but it lacks the deeper concepts of the Ving Gzung.

    I can't tell you what the concepts behind tan sau are, you just have to discover it for yourself.

  8. #18

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    Virus, you are now also a candidate for "man who was almost as awesome as Randy Couture 2007 award". Previous winners of this award have included names like Omega the Merciless, Aesopian, Chuck Norris, Royce Gracie, and Frank Dux (his award was rescinded due to questionable circumstances). Anyone knowing of other worth nominees for the "Man who was almost as awesome as Randy Couture Award 2007" please contact me.

  9. #19
    Virus's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vince Tortelli
    Dear Virus, against all rational expectations, my awesome skills at chi-sau have failed to get me a girlfriend. I am thinking of taking some BJJ, because I have heard they have chokes that can render a person unconsious in seconds, solving that problem. Would this be incompatible with the concept s of Wing Chun?

    Dr. Tzun Tsu
    I'm sorry but the only chunner to ever get laid is Emin Boztepe.

  10. #20
    Snake Plissken's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Vince Tortelli
    Virus, you are now also a candidate for "man who was almost as awesome as Randy Couture 2007 award". Previous winners of this award have included names like Omega the Merciless, Aesopian, Chuck Norris, Royce Gracie, and Frank Dux (his award was rescinded due to questionable circumstances). Anyone knowing of other worth nominees for the "Man who was almost as awesome as Randy Couture Award 2007" please contact me.
    Please.

    Like T3H Norris ever loses any anything, anytime, anywhere.

    Norris is always winner, everyone else is competing for first loser.
    Last edited by Snake Plissken; 9/05/2007 5:18pm at . Reason: misspelled loses

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