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  1. Dagon Akujin is offline
    Dagon Akujin's Avatar

    "I feel naked I was so distracted by your penis"

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    Posted On:
    8/07/2007 8:24pm


     Style: Ving Tsun

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    Baltimore, MD: Livingston's Chinese Health and Fitness Center

    Livingston's Chinese Health and Fitness Center

    The "bad feeling" started when I called to find out about classes. My "When are your _ing _un classes" question ilicited a 30 minute response from "sigung" Edgar Livingston, all about how many different arts he has the lineage to, how Koreans have screwed up martial arts ("Contracts!"), how "traditional" he is, and how Northern Chinese styles had to kick people off horses like they do in TKD. But I had hope, since he wasn't the actual _ing _un sifu.

    Rule #1: **** hope.

    So I get there and the guy is sitting in his pajamas in his office. Everyone else there is in pajamas and keep bowing to the guy over and over to the point where I was giving them "you're fucking weirding me out" looks. They were very smiley and kept bowing to me. The sigung starts talking from the time I go in. About his invitation to be a monk. About his knee operation. About giving Dim-Mak to a kid is about as smart as giving them a shotgun. About the difference between Southern Mantis and Seven Star Mantis. About how he carries on the lineage of both. About the vodka he uses to make his ointment. Keeps talking.

    I notice about 20 "degrees" hung behind his desk. I also notice that he does not have a single picture of himself standing behind a seated sifu. Not one. Yet he was chosen to carry on "White Eyebrow" and around 10 other styles? There are weapons all over the place. There is a 35 lbs. kwan. Five pound escrima sticks. A 115 lbs. 14 year old.

    And I start wondering, "Why are they calling him sigung? He doesn't have a single sifu under him. All the other sifus are people he brought in to teach other styles. They aren't his students. Did he just say that he fought Lei Tai for 15 years?"

    He was doing a Mantis class and started with the longest, most convoluted "bow" I've ever seen. He kept talking while a couple students followed along. He started mentioning how he "gave Mantis style" to someone who hadn't had it before. "Like a fucking Christmas present?" I wondered to myself. He was tall. He looked ready to fall over. Was it the vodka?

    The "advanced Wing Chun student" came in then. Big guy. Looked tough. I was handed off to him and we started working on some drills. Convaluted, over-dramatic, 10 moves to respond to a 2 punch set-up drills. The student then began to talk and I noticed that he took after the "sigung". Kept talking.

    "Okay, if I'm going to punch you, you start with a tan, then wu under it, then shift to the side, then I'm going to come in with a second punch, and you bong it, shift to the other side, come under the arm, pak, move in and palm to my face." Um... simple and straight-forward? After a few minutes ("Make sure you're foot is there, and get your arm over here, and make sure to get your hand on this part of my forearm"), he kinda noticed that I'm not "getting" it and we try a different drill.

    "You just gotta feel it and flow with it." So now I've gotta bong the first punch, then side-step and bong the second one (?), then hunch overtop his arm and throw a chop at his face while shifting again to punch him in the ribs. I'm not feeling it or flowing with it very well, so I start to just bong the first hit, and push into him down the center, moving him back with multiple fists on his chest. Each time I "feel" or "flow", I notice that I'm doing something a lot more simple and straight-forward. Like a simple counter punch instead of a pull-down, shift, pak, shift, step, chop, retreat, shift while he's frozen for my Mortal Kombat combo.

    "See man, if you're there I might still hit you, and I don't want to get hit." Me: "I just figure I'm going to be hitting you 10 times, so I'll eat your fist as I'm moving into you instead of trying to move all over and do 10 different moves." "Dog!"

    I asked about doing some chi-sau and he said that they did it different, so we didn't do any. We started locking and breaking arm drills... ? I still couldn't figure out why I wasn't just punching him in the throat. I felt kinda bad for him. Don't get me wrong, the guy seemed tough and all. He had muscles. He kept talking. It's just that it seemed like I could control his center and strike down it with ease. And seriously, what the **** is up with lengthy, multi-faceted "moves"? We never did one form. We never did a standard wing chun drill (though he did mention some in passing).

    Maybe I'm just biased because the conversations at my Detroit school went more like this: "Dude... so I saw this video of a girl fucking a donkey..." *punch punch punch*

    Class ended and I got a little bit of a tour. They had a large punching bag filled with... concrete. X-TRA HARDCORE! They had little sandbags to practice t3h d2adly 3y3 g0ug3s! Every student had a book on Shaolin Monks or a Kung-Fu magazine. They had tons of different sashes for each art there. They asked me to come back when the Wing Chun sifu is there since he's so hardcore too.



    Jesus-****, I should've gotten drunk.

    Dagon Akujin
    Last edited by Dagon Akujin; 8/07/2007 10:00pm at .
  2. Tomas Drgon is offline

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    Posted On:
    8/08/2007 10:00am


     Style: n/a

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    lol!!

    BTW, the heavy bag is filled with large pebbles I think, not concrete, unless they "upgraded" it.
    It IS a strange place. I went to check them out once, I work right next door (Bayview) and was looking for a place where I could go and hit the heavy bag during my lunch break.


    :)

    Tomas
  3. zanshoto is offline

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    Posted On:
    12/11/2007 6:17pm

    Bullshido Newbie
     

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    wow

    i can't wait to see this buncha retards
  4. LOR is offline

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    Posted On:
    12/29/2007 3:19am

    Bullshido Newbie
     

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I remeber you Dagon. I was the student in the mantis class that night. I remember you coming in. The big guy that you said you were handed off to was not the "Advanced Wing Chun student" as you put it. He was just a student and new to Wing Chun and he was honest with you and told you that. I overheard him telling you he had only a couple of months, if that, training in Wing Chun somewhere in VA. and that he had recently joined the school and that he was there for a lesson himself. You were not being given a class as you so ignorantly put it. He was not there to teach you wing chun he would of been more than willing to have you show him a drill or two. That big guy as you called him has a black belt in Goju ryu, experience in Kenpo and a blue belt in BJJ and is an extremely tough guy but you would never know it from his easy going freindly demeanor. He was nothing but nice and polite to you and you said something about punching the big guy in the throat, what a mistake that would of been. The Wing Chun sifu was not there that evening and I heard you being told that. I also heard you being told to come back when he was there. You never did. You should try some sticky hands with Sigung livingston or Sifu Gabriel. Im sure you would see things differently if you touched hands with them. You shouldn't be so judgemental until youve acutally driven the car.
  5. Dagon Akujin is offline
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    "I feel naked I was so distracted by your penis"

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    Posted On:
    12/29/2007 4:12am


     Style: Ving Tsun

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by LOR
    I remeber you Dagon. I was the student in the mantis class that night.
    The 14 year-old or the guy who couldn't walk?

    I remember you coming in. The big guy that you said you were handed off to was not the "Advanced Wing Chun student" as you put it. He was just a student and new to Wing Chun and he was honest with you and told you that. I overheard him telling you he had only a couple of months, if that, training in Wing Chun somewhere in VA. and that he had recently joined the school and that he was there for a lesson himself.
    The guy probably didn't take a single breath the entire time I was there. He was simply talking too much. I believe I was told he was "advanced" by your "sigung".

    You were not being given a class as you so ignorantly put it. He was not there to teach you wing chun he would of been more than willing to have you show him a drill or two.
    I asked to chi-sao probably 3 times. He said that YOUR SCHOOL did it differently and so he didn't want to. He lead the workout and did not want to do any of "my" drills.

    That big guy as you called him has a black belt in Goju ryu, experience in Kenpo and a blue belt in BJJ and is an extremely tough guy but you would never know it from his easy going freindly demeanor. He was nothing but nice and polite to you and you said something about punching the big guy in the throat, what a mistake that would of been.
    This is a common misconception. When people find out that I study kung-fu (and I don't tell them myself) they always ask me "Can you show me some moves?" I tell them that we only have one move in _ing _un: punching people in the throat. There are no other "moves". Re-read the above with that in mind. Simple moves (i.e. punching in the throat) instead of some convaluted, overly detailed ****-fest.
    The Wing Chun sifu was not there that evening and I heard you being told that. I also heard you being told to come back when he was there. You never did. You should try some sticky hands with Sigung livingston or Sifu Gabriel. Im sure you would see things differently if you touched hands with them. You shouldn't be so judgemental until youve acutally driven the car.
    Dude, no.


    Dagon

    P.S. How is Livingston a "sigung"? Also, what pictures does he have of himself that look like this one? You should post them for each art he is was supposed to "carry on" or whatever, for each of his sifus.
    Last edited by Dagon Akujin; 12/29/2007 11:52am at .
  6. LOR is offline

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    Posted On:
    12/29/2007 7:02pm

    Bullshido Newbie
     

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Had you gone over to the area where Sifu Gabriels wooden dummy was you would of seen him in picutures with Inosanto and many others not only sitting with and standing with but working out with. He is true to the art. I'll say it again. You were told the instructor was not there that evening and you should come back when he was. You never did. If you did you would have to retract your previous review, be humbled, and probably have yourself a nice place to workout and expand your martial friend base. You probably won't and I venture to guess its because your one of those people who likes to just write stuff to be negative that you think are funny to others and to have others read and get off on the sensless controversy. You say you study Kung fu and yet you talk the way you do and have the attitude you have. I feel kind of bad for you. Your probably not very well liked and kind of lonely. Your friends are probably a bunch of other misfits(I mean that in the nicest way) that no body else likes and you hang around with each other because nobody wants to. You say you study kung fu. Kind of doubt that. You say you punch people in the throat and thats your only move. Any idiot can punch someone in the throat. Ive seen special ed students do that. You were asked to come in and touch hands with Sifu Gabriel. Until you do that nothing you say carries any weight and anyone with any sense knows that. You will probably reply with some sensless nonesense so I will say it one more time and reply nomore to the "Not so brilliant" individual that you seem to be. You may be highly intellegent but from the way you have presented yourself it doesn't seem likely. Until you have touched hands with Sifu Gabriel or Livingston you cannot give an accurate assesmant of the school and the statments you have made thus far carry no weight and in reality mean nothing. Enough said. Case closed . Point made. Any one with any sense no this. I think I have made myself abundently clear and need to say no more. Wish you well.
  7. Dagon Akujin is offline
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    "I feel naked I was so distracted by your penis"

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    Posted On:
    12/29/2007 7:46pm


     Style: Ving Tsun

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Well, I certainly won't be surprised if you're the 14 year-old or the semi-retarded guy who couldn't walk. Note that you haven't "disproven" or "rebutted" anything in my posts? You have not added to the review. You have also avoided all of my questions. All you have done is glaze on a few layers of ad-hominim.

    Quote Originally Posted by LOR
    Had you gone over to the area where Sifu Gabriels wooden dummy was you would of seen him in picutures with Inosanto and many others not only sitting with and standing with but working out with. He is true to the art.
    You have no clue what that picture I posted even is, do you? There are pictures of myself working out and sitting around with my si-taigung. That means nothing and you obviously are in a school that has no clue what the seated portrait is. Meaning, your school is not "true to the art" in any way, shape, or form. Why is Livingston a sigung again? Hell, how is he even a sifu? Who is your sifu, if Livingston is your sigung?

    I'll say it again. You were told the instructor was not there that evening and you should come back when he was. You never did. If you did you would have to retract your previous review, be humbled, and probably have yourself a nice place to workout and expand your martial friend base. You probably won't and I venture to guess its because your one of those people who likes to just write stuff to be negative that you think are funny to others and to have others read and get off on the sensless controversy.
    I missed out on meeting and getting drunk with an incredibly hot chick that night (Errant108's sister and friends). I was not ever going to make that same mistake to visit your piece-of-**** school again.

    You say you study Kung fu and yet you talk the way you do and have the attitude you have. I feel kind of bad for you. Your probably not very well liked and kind of lonely. Your friends are probably a bunch of other misfits(I mean that in the nicest way) that no body else likes and you hang around with each other because nobody wants to.
    Um... And I'm the one with some "bad" kung-fu attitude? Listen, I'm sure that you've never even touched a woman, but I've turned down more 19 year-old girls this last week alone than you will ever get your fingers inside of. You are either 14 or deformed. Does this post really need to be about your virginity?

    You say you study kung fu. Kind of doubt that. You say you punch people in the throat and thats your only move. Any idiot can punch someone in the throat. Ive seen special ed students do that.
    I didn't say that punching people in the throat was my only move. I said it's the only "move" in _ing _un. If you are taking martial arts to learn moves, then you are obviously 14 or mentaly challenged (and a virgin). Just stop.

    You were asked to come in and touch hands with Sifu Gabriel. Until you do that nothing you say carries any weight and anyone with any sense knows that. You will probably reply with some sensless nonesense so I will say it one more time and reply nomore to the "Not so brilliant" individual that you seem to be. You may be highly intellegent but from the way you have presented yourself it doesn't seem likely. Until you have touched hands with Sifu Gabriel or Livingston you cannot give an accurate assesmant of the school and the statments you have made thus far carry no weight and in reality mean nothing. Enough said. Case closed . Point made. Any one with any sense no this. I think I have made myself abundently clear and need to say no more. Wish you well.
    The school is filled with old women, children, retards, kung-fu magazines, a bag filled with concrete, vodka elixers, dim-mak, and a drunken old guy in his silk pajamas who doesn't know what the **** he is talking about or doing. I don't think touching hands is going to do anything but make my hands smell like that vodka **** and old man.

    Listen, if you want to get in a verbal battle here on Bullshido, I'm sure that I'll make you look like a cum-ingesting pissant. So why don't you instead present some of your experiences at the school? Tell us your rank, how long you've been there, why you like it, etc., etc. What other martial arts have you studied? Instead of jumping on me, it'd be better for you to tell us your side.

    Dagon :new_popco
  8. Dagon Akujin is offline
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    "I feel naked I was so distracted by your penis"

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    Posted On:
    12/29/2007 8:29pm


     Style: Ving Tsun

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    HOLY **** I JUST WENT TO YOUR FUCKING WEBPAGE AND IT HAS FUCKING CARL DOUGLAS PLAYING ON EVERY SINGLE PAGE **** YOU MOTHERFUCK!!!2!122!1

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MJQu97_Xwiw

    GET THE **** OUT NOW!
  9. ForkLiftRacer is offline

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    Posted On:
    3/02/2008 11:59pm

    Bullshido Newbie
     Style: I don't do anything now

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Dang..... this got UGLY!!!!!

    :icon_pale
  10. Tomas Drgon is offline

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    Posted On:
    3/04/2008 12:53am


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    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    And now local update:

    Livingston's place burned down, must have happened within the last few months...

    Tomas
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