Hall OF Shame--Moment Of Bullshido Purity

[Poo-Jitsu]

Just a question, Kickcatcher, about those photos a couple of posts upthread. Why would the guy standing not be rushing around to land kicks on the fallen guy's head?

he's considering his injuries. duh. what else would he be doing after teh d34dly kick to the lower leg bones?

[El-Wood]

The sad part? Even as he's dropping, that overhand left gets me on the top of the noggin. Why, you ask? I asked myself the same thing. I looked down at my right hand, and where was it? Fist clenched, palm up, underneath my armpit with the elbow sticking out the back. That's right, I'm not kidding. At Kyokushin position--not as far down as Shotokan or TKD, but every bit as useless for defensive purposes.

I've never seen someone past yellow try to fight with their arm like that - either you hadn't been training long enough or you guys must not have been actually sparring - keeping your hand like that will get your jaw broken by a good kick...

Not that there aren't problems with the whole "no punches to the head" thing but still...

[seriousmantid]

My most embarassing moment: well when I was 18 I was hanging out with some gangmembers in a town I barely Knew and we were all getting drunk. Well these two steroid heads kept eyeballing me so I decided to leave. As I was walking away one of them hit me in the ear from behind. I turned around ear ringing and realized I had to be hella drunk if I didn't feel that. So I asked him what he was going to do next and he just got in a car weith the others and they drove off. Well I went to a friends house I kinda knew and kept drinking. After I tought about it I decided to go to this dudes house and kick his ass. What I retard I was, as I reached the street they lived on all the sudden everything went black. I could hear the guys running up on me but was too drunk to see. I woke up the next morning covered in blood lying in a trash can with ants crawling all over me. It took the better part of the day to remember how I got there damn they beat my Ass. A momentary lapse in inteligence what a dumb ass.

[sochin101]

I woke up the next morning covered in blood lying in a trash can with ants crawling all over me.

damn them... I paid for FLESH-EATING ants...

[Khun Kao]

Was he asian by any chance?
I've trained withy two asian guys in judo and jiu jitsu, one japanese other chinese.
Both were mean but the chinese guy was a sadist.
I learned a lot though about myself and mentality.

Sorry, getting back to the thread late.....

No, he was a 6'2", hard as rock, dark-skinned black guy. Literally, the 1st time I met him I was reminded of Darth Vader

However, what you said about learning a lot about yourself and mentality is most definitely the truth!!! I may not have learned a great deal about fighting, but I learned a lot of other things that I feel laid the groundwork for my success in MuayThai...

[MrGalt]

This isn't a fight story, but it's definitely bullshido. I had almost repressed this memory.

Back in high school I was a blue belt in Isshinryu (which many of you know has very little potential for XMA), but I thought all that junk was necessary so I worked it out on my own. I got a couple of friends from my school and the local Ke?po school together and put together a demonstration for the high school talent show in front of 2,000 other students. I'll give you the highlights until I YouTube this abomination someday:

musical forms...check
musical choreographed fight...check
musical choreographed fight where 4'8" girl beats up two 6' boys...check
bad pseudo-capoeira...check
Johnny Cage split punch...check
backflips...check
board breaking...check
board breaking with a raw egg in the breaking hand...check
broke my right hand so I'll never be able to hit another board in my life...check

We did win show twice. The prize money didn't even pay for all the boards. I was a pretty nice guy so nobody ever had real beef with me, but we actually wondered why so many wrestlers and football players were suddenly convinced they could kick my buddy's ass after he did the demo with me.

[Fantasy Warrior]

Just a question, Kickcatcher, about those photos a couple of posts upthread. Why would the guy standing not be rushing around to land kicks on the fallen guy's head? Most of what I've seen, in terms of street action, goes that way: if somebody goes down, the boots go to his head, pronto. Thanks for the link, by the way. When some useless thing called "work" doesn't get in the way, I'll check it out.

Practiced correctly Taekwondo has potent low kicks, especially when rebranded CKD. CKD owns all those techniques. When kicked by a CKD stylist you immediately grab your left ankle, it's a rule.





PS. Click the link, you know you want to.

[DAYoung]

DAYOUNG'S MOMENT OF KARATE SHAME
BJJ Wins Again

When I was 16, I was in a schoolyard fight. The guy was much bigger and stronger than me. But I interfered with his bullying, so I was next.

It was on.

He's swinging, I'm ducking, he's pushing, I'm weaving. He throws me up against the fence.

AND WHAT DO I DO?

A Goju-Kai knifehand to the throat.

He casually slaps it aside, and there's more swinging. I finally catch one above the eye, which opens up and spews blood everywhere (I still have the scar, but luckily the doctor was across the road for stitches).

So now I'm pissed off. I don't remember much, but we end up on the asphalt, I lock in a choke, and squeeze until he gives up.

I'm told he sat there for a good ten minutes coughing, hacking, groaning and wheezing after I left.

But I'm still ashamed of the lame Goju-Kai knifehand. Years of training in Karate, just so I can grapple when I really need it.

How embarrassing.

[Aleem]

After I was charged £10 for an hour's lesson in WingTsun where we sat cross-legged whilst the teacher actually wrote physics equations on the board, and drew diagrams of how we should be stepping if someone punches us, I began thinking hard.

Most embarassingly, I actually contacted my teacher because I seriously wanted to become an instructor in WingTsun. It never clicked in my mind that there was something seriously messed up in taking about five punches to the face in a playfight with a 130 pound girl. I tan-saued and I bong-saued and did the whole pigeon toed thing - it was a real embarassment.

Anyways, Muay Thai has been my proverbial shower, which I'm using very frequently to wipe that proverbial ****, that was WingTsun, off my body.

[patfromlogan]

So you've trained in your colour-coded jumpsuit, done your dances, whizzed your 540 spin kicks for years. You've shelled out megacash for your lifetime-membership (which earned you that jumpsuit) and paid, again and again, for those promotion tests.

But have you attained Bullshido? Have you experienced that moment of purity? Well, sometimes, those MA fuckups which signify that purity can happen spontaneously...and to anyone. We all have our hall-of shame moments (except for you perfect fighting machines who never make a mistake--and who the hell's talking to you? STFU).

Well, here's one of mine:

Early eighties. Front door of downtown Toronto nightclub. My job. Although it's years before UFC, it's already well-known that many gi-wearing TMAs get you pounded on the street. Those of us who trained in them--but work in real situations--know we have to change our striking...especially the defenses. After years of supplementing my Judo with a kind of Karate thought tougher than other styles, I've been working for a few months on defenses more in line with Boxing.

Closing time. Most patrons have filed out, when out comes a tall-and-skinny with chipmunk cheeks instead of a jaw and chin. I'll call him buttface. He's all frustrated and swearing at the women coming out of the place, saying they're all "lesbians" because none of them were interested in going home with him. A woman responds with some comment or other and then he's running to grab her. I catch him and hammerlock him against the wall long enough for her to leave sight, but he starts yelling very specific and graphic death threats at her. As per the workplace SOP, buttface now has to be held and the police called.

I hand him to another doorman and get out my IR book. While I'm writing it up, buttface manages to wriggle out of the other doorstaff's grip. He runs at me, launching a looping overhand left. Not having any time for a thoughtful reaction, I go instinct and catch him coming in with a straight left of my own.

The sad part? Even as he's dropping, that overhand left gets me on the top of the noggin. Why, you ask? I asked myself the same thing. I looked down at my right hand, and where was it? Fist clenched, palm up, underneath my armpit with the elbow sticking out the back. That's right, I'm not kidding. At Kyokushin position--not as far down as Shotokan or TKD, but every bit as useless for defensive purposes. I squeezed my eyes shut, let my chin fall to my chest, and then let my hands drop. If buttface had had any buds there, they could have wailed on my head until the other bouncers dragged them off...and I would have let them, because that's what dumb fucks deserve (ask Darwin). Months of trying to change, but when there was no time to think, the previous years of habits kicked right in.

The only thing that saved my ass was that Buttface had no training, his hands weren't bareknuckle-conditioned and he weighed maybe about one-eighty, so I had almost eighty pounds on him. Even, so, if he had come in with anything other than a stupid looping-overhand, I might have caught one on the button instead of being ineffectually tagged up top.

He ended up with a concussion, a glass jaw and a sprained wrist. You can bet that, long after he'd recovered from those, I was still being called "grasshopper" by my smirking colleagues at the door. At least it was before "karate kid" terminology became common, so I didn't have to put up with "wax on, wax off". Not that I wouldn't have deserved it.

*sighs, hangs head in abject shame* Wish I could have had anti-stupidity counselling, but there were no LARP-anon chapters nearby.

Well, there it is. My hall-of-shame moment. One of them, anyways. How about anyone else?

C'mon, fessup. Share your attainment, your moment of bullshido purity. Please.

Your Kyokushin sucks, mine works.