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  1. spathophile is offline

    Join Date
    Feb 2007
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    83

    Posted On:
    4/15/2007 10:46pm


     Style: Phucking Phrost

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    Words of a former Backyard Samurai

    Backyard Samurai:Bored otaku who read a few books then decide they practice a sword art. This type of mindset usually begins because of withheld idolization of a cartoon character that one watched as a very young child. This retained childhood subconcious fantasy tends to manfest itself through owning countless books on swords, half of which are usually several years out of date or whose authors are more likely then not considered mindless hacks by serious students of swordsmanship. Then after having read said books, one picks up a bokken, shinai, or just plain ugly stick. They commence to practice moves got from the books. These "moves" tend poorly understood, poorly excecuted, and downright ugly.


    This is a subject I know quite well, since am I a recovering backyard samurai. I tell you here and now, to those contemplating self-training Asian Sword Arts, for your own safety and intelligence please find an instructor. If one cannot be found then please either wait till you have enough money to move somewhere else or take up something useful like Boxing. Something that can actually teach you how to fight, and please for the love of God leave the Katana to the experts. Don't give places like England, where there is a possibility for sword ban, more fuel for the fire. You have no idea how much a freak accident in the news about some untrained goofball cutting his thumb off can actually come back to bite sword enthusists halfway around the world in the ass.

    I am imploring you, please don't try to teach yourself Kenjutsu and you try to teach yourself a C.S.A then trust me your going to tear something somewhere along the line.
    Techniques with a Jian or Dao make Kenjutsu look simple(I'm not saying it is simple as in easy learn, just less complicated)

    Please Please! don't become a backyard samurai, you will only end deluding yourself, and you will waste valuable time that you could be to at least learn how to fight if there is no one to teach you
  2. SongPower is offline
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    Registered Member

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    Jan 2007
    Location
    Sterling, VA
    Posts
    185

    Posted On:
    4/16/2007 12:11am


     Style: BJJ, FMA

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    What about being a backyard ninja?

    Name:  backyardninja copy.jpg
Views: 31
Size:  16.1 KB

    This seems perfectly safe to me. And I've only mistakenly poisoned my little brother once.
  3. Mr. Jones is offline
    Mr. Jones's Avatar

    resident sick ****

    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Dallas
    Posts
    3,309

    Posted On:
    4/16/2007 12:21am

    Join us... or die
     Style: Being a total psychopath

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    When I was a little kid I used to play with wooden sticks and pretend I was a powerful warrior.
    カンフー
  4. spathophile is offline

    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Posts
    83

    Posted On:
    4/16/2007 12:42am


     Style: Phucking Phrost

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Backyard Ninja should just stop, they need to find at least a bujinkan and join so whhen someone who won't patronize them comes along they can aleast pretend ignorance when they have their delusions shattered.

    Better yet, ditch the black costume and start Muay Thai,
    Backyard Martial Artists of every kind tend to have self-esteem issues and actually being able to kick someone's ass would greatly
  5. SongPower is offline
    SongPower's Avatar

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Sterling, VA
    Posts
    185

    Posted On:
    4/16/2007 12:56am


     Style: BJJ, FMA

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Backyard Ninja should just stop, they need to find at least a bujinkan and join so whhen someone who won't patronize them comes along they can aleast pretend ignorance when they have their delusions shattered.
    There are people that don't patronize ninjas?! What an age we live in
  6. FickleFingerOfFate is offline
    FickleFingerOfFate's Avatar

    Guess which finger is the fickle one...

    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Up in your grill.
    Posts
    5,645

    Posted On:
    4/16/2007 11:06am

    supporting member
     Style: Karate/ Arnis

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Mr. Jones
    When I was a little kid I used to play with wooden sticks and pretend I was a powerful warrior.
    And obviously nothing has changed,

    you just traded your sticks for a keyboard.
    If you can't laugh at yourself,
    Others will be happy to do it for you. :evil6:

    The 2 most abundant elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.


  7. M1K3 is offline
    M1K3's Avatar

    Senior Member

    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Southern NJ
    Posts
    2,367

    Posted On:
    4/16/2007 11:19am


     Style: submission grappling

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I prefer backyard Sumo. You can spend most of your training time eating chips and drinking beer trying to get you weight up. Ya can't weigh to much in sumo. Mmmmm beer.
  8. FickleFingerOfFate is offline
    FickleFingerOfFate's Avatar

    Guess which finger is the fickle one...

    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Up in your grill.
    Posts
    5,645

    Posted On:
    4/16/2007 12:07pm

    supporting member
     Style: Karate/ Arnis

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Mmmmmm Doughnuts.
    If you can't laugh at yourself,
    Others will be happy to do it for you. :evil6:

    The 2 most abundant elements in the universe are hydrogen and stupidity.


  9. TheBigSwede is offline

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Jan 2007
    Location
    Uppsala, Sweden
    Posts
    172

    Posted On:
    4/16/2007 12:29pm


     Style: Judo + sports ju-jutsu

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    What's the lower age limit to be a backyard ninja? Being a kid doesn't really count since many kids do playfighting with weapons. I'd say about 12.
  10. KhanomTom is offline

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Location
    Liverpool, England
    Posts
    84

    Posted On:
    4/16/2007 1:03pm


     Style: Muay Thai / Tae Kwon-Do

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Backyard Wrestling LMAO!!!!
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