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  1. Ke?poFist is offline
    Ke?poFist's Avatar

    Enforcer of Northeast Anti-Silliness Department Inc.

    Join Date
    Jan 2006
    Location
    Long Island, NY
    Posts
    6,884

    Posted On:
    1/26/2007 1:56am

    supporting member
     Style: Kaju, BJJ, Judo, Kempo

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    Is your school Bullshido? Take the test and find out.

    I'm sure this has been done a few times before, but I feel it has to be done right, and hopefully eventually stickied after some revisions in newbietown so we can cut down on a lot of unnecessary BS arguing that's been done to death.

    EDIT: Due to the help of some people on this thread, as well as over on BS, I will be editing a few questions to reclarify their intent. Those numbers are: 2, 3, and 12. Thanks to all who pointed those out.

    How to tell if your school is BS or not for the untrained eye.
    This is a list of red flags that should go up when training at or viewing a school. Add up the points with the numbers you've experienced to see where your school falls.

    Keep in mind that some questions may not apply to your school (eg. boxing gym isn't expected to teach grappling) BUT if your school does attempt to teach something they are not focused on, then holding them to these standards applies. Be as honest as possible with yourself, and then take a long hard look at what you're actually spending your time and money on, as opposed to what you could be doing.

    1. There are Black Belts under the age of 13 (+3pts)

    2. You ARE OFFERED to spar/roll medium to hard contact:
    Every Session (+0 pts)
    Once a Week (+1pts)
    Once a Month (+3 pts)
    Never (+5 pts)

    3. You're told MMA isn't like real fighting. This implies that MMA is nothing like a real fight because >insert excuse<. Saying it is the closest thing to a real fight, but not the same thing, does not count. (+1pts)

    4. The majority of the techniques you learn you can't pull off live in sparring, and you've never seen your instructor nor anyone else use them successfully either. (+2pts)

    5. If #4 applied to you, then when questioning your instructor about that issue, you get the response that this is because the moves are too "dangerous" or "deadly" to be used within sparring or rolling. Usually this is followed up by a quick reminder about "how we all want to get to work" the next day, and how we aren't out to hurt each other. (+4 pts)

    6. You ever hear the words "anti-grappling" being used to describe what you are learning (+2pts)

    7. You're told sparring builds bad habits (+4pts)

    8. You are never shown to cover properly to protect from strikes, but rather were shown a plethora of intricate blocks and parries. (+2pts)

    9. Belief in "No-Touch Knockouts" (+3pts)

    10. Belief in the practical use of mystical "chi" energy in every day combat. (+2pts)

    11. You spend time learning how to utilize pressure points to control or incapacitate your opponent (+1 pts)

    12. Your instructor pronounces Royce Gracie's name with an "R" (should be with an H, like "Hoyce") (+1pts)

    13. Testing for rank requires only repeating moves in the air or on mostly compliant partners/uke's. (+2pts)

    14. You spend more classtime watching your instructor demonstrate techniques on compliant dummies, than you do actually trying to apply those techniques live. (+2pts)

    15. For every adult student there is 15 child students (+1pts)

    16. You're taught kata is to a martial artist as shadowboxing or heavybag work is to a boxer (+1pts)

    17. Grappling being taught but there being no certification of the instructor having formal training or competition experience. (+3pts)

    18. You've never seen your instructors spar or roll with anyone but compliant uke's (+2pts)

    19. You're told that ANY strike whatever it may be (groin kick, shin kick, eye gouge etc...) will stop any attacker in their tracks. (+2pts)

    20. Everyone's uniform is clean pressed and neat, in good condition and perhaps even has pretty little sew on patches that don't look faded or worn in the least. (+2pts)

    21. You simply look at the higher ranks, and can plainly see that they are unfit/can't spar/or just plain suck. (+4pts)




    SCORING:
    0-2 Your school is an awesome place to train. Good find!
    3-5 Some fishy stuff, but still sounds pretty good.
    6-10 There's a few red flags here, but perhaps you or they can explain themselves.
    11-15 I'm not liking your explanation
    16+ Your school is undoubtedly a bullshido ridden mess. Get out while you still can! Don't drink the Kool-Aid!
    Last edited by Ke?poFist; 1/28/2007 3:16pm at .
    Knowing is not enough, you must apply...
    ...Willing is not enough you must do
    ~Bruce Lee

  2. MEGA JESUS-SAMA is offline
    MEGA JESUS-SAMA's Avatar

    **** you math class

    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Pirate Island
    Posts
    7,039

    Posted On:
    1/26/2007 2:07am

    supporting member
     Style: TKD, Ballet, Archery

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Do your threads suck? Take this test and find out!

    Is your name Kempofist? (5 points)

    Scoring:

    5 points: shut the **** up
  3. Virus is offline
    Virus's Avatar

    Senior Member

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    6,967

    Posted On:
    1/26/2007 2:11am

    Join us... or die
     Style: Judo

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    The final question should be "Did you lie and/or distort the truth when answering any of these questions?" (+5 points per question)
  4. King Sleepless is offline
    King Sleepless's Avatar

    I am a living legend!

    Join Date
    Jul 2005
    Location
    Cuba
    Posts
    10,047

    Posted On:
    1/26/2007 2:12am

    supporting member
     Style: Tatsumaki Senpuu Kyaku

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Everyone in this thread has some specific instructions I just sent via +rep.
  5. MEGA JESUS-SAMA is offline
    MEGA JESUS-SAMA's Avatar

    **** you math class

    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Pirate Island
    Posts
    7,039

    Posted On:
    1/26/2007 2:16am

    supporting member
     Style: TKD, Ballet, Archery

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    it's like a mixture of christmas and mission impossible
  6. Virus is offline
    Virus's Avatar

    Senior Member

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    Australia
    Posts
    6,967

    Posted On:
    1/26/2007 2:31am

    Join us... or die
     Style: Judo

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Does the school teach a style which isn't used in MMA? (+10 points)

    Is the tern "Ninja" ever used by the instructor? (+16 points)
    Last edited by Virus; 1/26/2007 2:33am at .
  7. FUNKtastic is offline

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    NYC
    Posts
    255

    Posted On:
    1/26/2007 2:53am


     Style: Judo

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Cool I got a 2, the only question I added points for was;

    18. You've never seen your instructors spar or roll with anyone but compliant uke's (+2pts)

    Well to clarify I haven't seen the head Sensei spar since I haven't been there long and he just had surgery. We do have two black belts and a brown who take his place and roll with everyone all the time.

    Feels so good to be in a Judo school.
  8. rw4th is offline
    rw4th's Avatar

    Senior Member

    Join Date
    Jan 2005
    Location
    Canada
    Posts
    1,022

    Posted On:
    1/26/2007 3:16am


     Style: BJJ,MT,RBSD (on hiatus)

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Your uniform/clothing is clean and dry at the end of a class (+5 points)

    Your instructor preaches at length about budo and what it means to be a warrior (+2 points)

    You are told that conditioning is not a factor in your ability to fight (+3 points)
    Last edited by rw4th; 1/26/2007 3:32am at .
  9. Cormoran is offline

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    Adelaide, Australia
    Posts
    362

    Posted On:
    1/26/2007 3:41am


     Style: Shotokan

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I'll wait till i can confirm whether or not this is a joke thread before i'll bother answering.
  10. ojgsxr6 is offline

    Dorkus Malorkus

    Join Date
    Jul 2004
    Location
    Queens, NY
    Posts
    3,008

    Posted On:
    1/26/2007 3:47am

    supporting member
     Style: Boxing/BJJudo/Crossfit

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    1. There are Black Belts under the age of 13 (+3pts)
    0

    2. You spar medium to hard contact:

    Once a week (+1pts)

    3. You're told MMA isn't like "real" fighting (+1pts)
    0

    4. The majority of the techniques you learn you can't pull off live in sparring, and you've never seen your instructor nor anyone else use them successfully either. (+2pts)

    0

    5. If #4 applied to you, then when questioning your instructor about that issue, you get the response that this is because the moves are too "dangerous" or "deadly" to be used within sparring or rolling. Usually this is followed up by a quick reminder about "how we all want to get to work" the next day, and how we aren't out to hurt each other. (+4 pts)

    0

    6. You ever hear the words "anti-grappling" being used to describe what you are learning (+2pts)

    0

    7. You're told sparring builds bad habits (+4pts)
    0

    8. You are never shown to cover properly to protect from strikes, but rather were shown a plethora of intricate blocks and parries. (+2pts)

    0

    9. Belief in "No-Touch Knockouts" (+3pts)
    0

    10. Belief in the practical use of mystical "chi" energy in every day combat. (+2pts)

    0

    11. You spend time learning how to utilize pressure points to control or incapacitate your opponent (+1 pts)

    0

    12. Your instructor pronounces Royce Gracie's name with an "R" (+1pts)

    I haven't heard my instructor say Royce, but I know I pronounce it with an "R", and I'll never pronounce it Hoyce unless it's spelled that way.

    13. Testing for rank requires only repeating moves in the air or on mostly compliant partners/uke's. (+2pts)

    I don't know what to put it's that plus sparring for increasing amounts of time for each rank.

    14. You spend more classtime watching your instructor demonstrate techniques on compliant dummies, than you do actually trying to apply those techniques live. (+2pts)

    As the instructor's compliant dummy, some classes are like this not most, but more than I like.

    15. For every adult student there is 15 child students (+1pts)
    0

    16. You're taught kata is to a martial artist as shadowboxing or heavybag work is to a boxer (+1pts)

    0

    17. Grappling being taught but there being no certification of the instructor having formal training or competition experience. (+3pts

    +3

    18. You've never seen your instructors spar or roll with anyone
    but compliant uke's (+2pts)

    0

    19. You're told that ANY strike whatever it may be (groin kick, shin kick, eye gouge etc...) will stop any attacker in their tracks. (+2pts)
    0

    20. Everyone's uniform is clean pressed and neat, in good condition and perhaps even has pretty little sew on patches that don't look faded or worn in the least. (+2pts)

    0

    21. You simply look at the higher ranks, and can plainly see that they are unfit/can't spar/or just plain suck. (+4pts)
    0

    Ok, so if I add this up I'll know what Naruto character I am?
    Last edited by ojgsxr6; 1/26/2007 3:50am at .
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