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  1. #1
    Bustardo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Flint, MI
    Posts
    642
    Style
    BJJ/Pekiti Tersia/Hsing-I
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    Three guys are sitting around in a Jiu Jitsu Club...

    So three of us are sitting around after Jiu jitsu class (My instructor, my friend Mike and I) and in walks this wierd looking guy. They Teach Kung Fu and BJJ at our club, so this wacko must have seen the sign on the door.

    The wierd looking guy comes into the room and the conversaion goes like this:

    Whacko: "Hey! I want to show you a sumthin'!"
    Jim(The BJJ and Kung Fu Instructor): "Ok"
    Whacko: ".... wait.... Go get a pole!"
    Jim: *Hesitates* goes and grabs a pole off the wall
    Whacko: "Ok... Now swing it at me really slow!"
    Jim: *swings the pole arm at him very slowly*
    Whacko: *Sticks arm up to absorb the poles impact, then grabs the pole and pulls on it*
    Jim: *Lets go of pole* You know, if someone swung that at you hard, you couldn't block it like that, it'd either break your arm or your arm would hurt so bad you probably wouldn't be able to grab it.
    Whacko: *Laughs* OK! Back to the drawing board

    He then goes to show us another technique he developed in which he grabs the hand which swings the pole and disarms the attacker. To which Jim asked "How would you get that close? If you tried that I'd hit you before you could even get that close... etc"
    To which the whacko says, "Back to the drawing board!!!"

    All three of us were trying really hard not to laugh, but some laughter slipped out. When he noticed I said, "I can't believe no one has thought of these before, let me record these techniques!" To which the whacko agreed.

    Here is his "Method of attacking three guys"

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5T13-o1BNwY

    Here is his "Pole arm Techniques #1"
    My Friend Mike is playing along in these, acting like the whacko's techniques are "Teh Deadly"

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y3FLdJznPxs


    Here is his "Pole Arm Technique #2"
    in this one he tells us his name, "David Davis". The New master of Kung Fu has been discovered:
    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qx-Bc9oWhWk




    I have one more where he shows "Forms" in which Jim walks behind him and says "I better stay back or I might get hurt" I'm waiting for You Tube to process it.

  2. #2

    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Westchester, NY / Philadelphia, PA
    Posts
    2,131
    Style
    Relson GJJ
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Uhh, any possibility that this guy might be handicapped or fucking with you? If not, what a find!

  3. #3

    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Posts
    4
    Style
    kenpo/jiu-jitsu
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by MacWombat
    Uhh, any possibility that this guy might be handicapped ...
    That fits the bill.

  4. #4

    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Vaughan, ON (New Brunswick native)
    Posts
    553
    Style
    Sub-wrestling, mostly...
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Wow, what an interesting way to spend an evening...

  5. #5

    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    New York/Sapporo
    Posts
    659
    Style
    Aikido/Judo/BJJ/Naginata
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Martial arts studios are lightning rods for "t3h krazy".

  6. #6
    Bustardo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2006
    Location
    Flint, MI
    Posts
    642
    Style
    BJJ/Pekiti Tersia/Hsing-I
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by MacWombat
    Uhh, any possibility that this guy might be handicapped or fucking with you? If not, what a find!
    We suspect he was... Still a find!


    As a side note we were NOT mean to him in any way. We asked if we could record his "awesome technique" and he agreed. We made him Think he was T3h D34Dly! and he left very happy.

  7. #7

    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Westchester, NY / Philadelphia, PA
    Posts
    2,131
    Style
    Relson GJJ
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Fair enough. Then again, some stuff made by non-handicapped people is just as bad.

  8. #8
    chaosexmachina's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2004
    Location
    Calgary, Alberta, Canada
    Posts
    4,503
    Style
    MMA/Pankration
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Let's hope nobody with a staff attacks him on the street...
    "Prison is for rapists, thieves and murderers. If you lock someone up for smoking a plant that makes them happy, you're the fucking criminal." - Joe Rogan

    El Guapo says dance!

  9. #9

    Join Date
    May 2006
    Posts
    106
    Style
    TKD, uber BJJ n00b
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by chaosexmachina
    Let's hope nobody with a staff attacks him on the street...
    I was thinkin, its pretty damn low to attack some1 like that, but you know, after some of the news stories of what fucking KIDS are doing to elderly and disabled...wouldnt suprise me.

  10. #10

    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Westchester, NY / Philadelphia, PA
    Posts
    2,131
    Style
    Relson GJJ
    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    You're right Torec_Scrail. You should watch this documentary called "A Clockwork Orange." Really opened my eyes.

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