1. #1
    Here's looking at you, squid. Join us... or die
    OnceLost's Avatar
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    Sep 2006
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    North Florida
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    Damn I Wish I Was a Ninja

    I wish I was little bit Asian,
    Of the ninja persuasion,
    And I wish that a shogun
    Had killed all oí my relations.
    I wish I had some makibishi in a hat, wearing tabi
    To the ceremonial occasions.

    I wish I was like five-foot-three
    So I could get with some Shinobi,
    ĎCause I almost died deep inside
    When I felt how that art is part oí me.
    You know you canít see me,
    Because Iím all invisibility
    Or hiding up a tree.
    And I spend a lot of time
    Summoning my chi.
    Thatís how you know Iím deadly.
    And as for MMA, yo you might be
    All about the fight but I walk the street
    And I drink my green tea.
    You know Iím always ready
    To go and throw the ninja-to
    When Iím walking my city.

    I wish I had a brand-new shozoku
    So far, mine is wearing through
    And in the back, right near my crack
    Thereís a Ďlil brown streak of poo.
    Yeah, everywhere I go, people stare
    ĎCause they know Iím so cool.
    When I'm dressed in black Iím laid back -
    Until I go whack.
    Then I throw chi balls and thatís not all
    Iím like an air attack.
    But hey, letís get this straight -
    See I can't get a date
    No matter who I slay.
    I donít mind the scorn,
    I just download porn,
    Hell yeah - that anime!
    (But not that **** thatís gay)

    Hey, I wish I could use my ninpoís
    To take out my foes.
    But Iím not, donít wanna get caught
    By Master Orlando.
    Otherwise, youíd feast your eyes
    On a crazy violent floor show.
    So Iíll eat my sushi
    (ĎCause I canít take kim chi)
    And Iíll plot how not to get caught
    When I go on my spree.
    Iíll drop those grapplers
    And those who think theyíre worse,
    Then we ninja, yeah Iíll have them wishiní
    For a cute nurse.

    Yeah, I wish I was little bit Asian,
    'Cause Iím already of the ninja persuasion.

    True.

    Edit: Forum wrong moved from Bullshido to YMAS happy day to all.
    Boris, London
    Last edited by PizDoff; 10/30/2006 4:47pm at .

  2. #2
    TKD Black Belt's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Pure awesomeness.

    Entirely off topic and will most likely get moved to a more appropriate forum but I dig it for what it is.

    TKD

  3. #3

    Join Date
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    Melbourne, Australia
    Posts
    907
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I wish you hard worded it so that it could be sung to the tune of "I wish I was a punk rock girl"
    then you could have sent it to weird Al

  4. #4
    sochin101's Avatar
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    for me, it encapsulated the quinessential irony of man's eternal struggle to be acce....
    Ok, it was funny, and about Ninjas. What more can I ask for?
    Where there is only a choice between cowardice and violence, I would advise violence.

    Gandhi


  5. #5

    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Posts
    3,081
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Bwahaha! NINJAAA!

  6. #6

    Join Date
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Is this meant to be rapped to the tune of 'I Wish' from Skeelo? It's hilarious regardless.

  7. #7
    Here's looking at you, squid. Join us... or die
    OnceLost's Avatar
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    Sep 2006
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    North Florida
    Posts
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Thank you for putting this in the right forum! I am perhaps the essence of all that is whitey (insofar as I cannot rap), but I thought it was worth the attempt. Yes, it is (loosely) based on Skeelo's 'I Wish...'
    I can do requests...lol.

    Eventually I'll update and post an old story I jotted down about a Happy Dancing Buddha Flower Master who wears silk pajamas and refuses to fight because he might kill someone with his lethal art...

  8. #8

    Join Date
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    Tampa Fl
    Posts
    384
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    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Bravo...... makes me wanna be.......a ninja :ninjadanc

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