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  1. CanucKyokushin is offline

    He'll flip ya!

    Join Date
    Mar 2005
    Location
    ?????????
    Posts
    2,736

    Posted On:
    7/10/2006 2:15pm

    supporting member
     Style: Not.....working

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I hope this ends in some sort of murder-suicide because that would be sweet.
  2. FictionPimp is offline

    Sexiest Punching Bag Alive

    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Indiana
    Posts
    2,147

    Posted On:
    7/10/2006 2:21pm


     Style: BJJ/Judo/Boxing

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    this made the day go a little faster.
  3. 1bad65 is offline
    1bad65's Avatar

    Senior Member

    Join Date
    Nov 2003
    Location
    austin, tx
    Posts
    1,632

    Posted On:
    7/10/2006 2:26pm


     Style: boxing, gjj

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    This is great. It may well be destined for the Mega-Threads.

    Is the Sensei quite large by chance?
  4. Shinkengata is offline

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Nor Cal
    Posts
    382

    Posted On:
    7/10/2006 2:39pm


     Style: BJJ,MT,Wrestling,Boxing

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Day 74

    Dear Diary,

    Im sitting here at home. I got sent home early today cuz i showed up to school in my Ninja gi. What a crock of bullshit. Who else is gonna protect the school if robbers come in or something? The rent-a-cop that patrols the hallways, Mason, only has a can of pepper spray. And most of the time he just uses that on his tacos at lunch.

    IT's all good, though. This gives me time to prepare my lesson plan for class tonight. I'm gonna be showing the students advanced sword katas and teach them how to sew shuriken pockets into their JNCO's. We're planning on demonstrating at the Open Classic in a month. I just know we're gonna take all those trophies.

    Just had to put my backpack in the washing machine. I had some pepper bombs in there that burst and got all over my books and sh1t. Hazards of the job, i guess. I was hella sneezing and coughing when i opened it up. Imagine how my attackers are gonna feel when i throw it in their faces!!!


    (later on)

    Class went pretty well. Some kid from a cage fighter school showed up and called us all pussies and homos. He challenged me to a match, but i didn't want to kill him, so i declined. Sensei cast a spell on him , so his penis should be shrinking pretty soon. hehe.

    Later, Diary.
  5. tiktok is offline
    tiktok's Avatar

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Apr 2006
    Location
    Northern CA
    Posts
    146

    Posted On:
    7/10/2006 3:41pm


     Style: Bok Fu Do

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I have to admit that your tale has brought a smile to my face. Although your story is rife with injustice done to you (I mean seriously, a judo school claiming to defeat teh uber n1nja master??? lolz) it is clear that you are a bright and shining example of martial arts ethics and training. I eagerly await the next installment.

    Please continue!
  6. Poop Loops is offline
    Poop Loops's Avatar

    OOOOOOOOOOAAARRGGHH RLY?

    Join Date
    Nov 2004
    Location
    Americastan
    Posts
    10,025

    Posted On:
    7/10/2006 3:49pm

    supporting member
     Style: In Transition

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    This stuff is awesome. Especially the "sensei cast a spell on him."
  7. kungfujew is offline
    kungfujew's Avatar

    Sexe dans la derrière!

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    the left coast
    Posts
    726

    Posted On:
    7/10/2006 3:49pm

    supporting member
     Style: Muay Thai Khmer

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    If this all turns out to be plagerized I'm gonna have to strangle some kittens myself... If not, this deserves eventual publication upon completion, followed by sequels and spinoffs.
    "Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin to slit throats." H.L. Mencken
  8. Shinkengata is offline

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Nor Cal
    Posts
    382

    Posted On:
    7/10/2006 4:00pm


     Style: BJJ,MT,Wrestling,Boxing

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Day 88

    Dear Diary,


    Mom made me get out and get a job if i wanted to still pay for classes, so i got a job as a cook at Burger King. It's cool because i can practice my shuriken throwing with the burger patties. I also like to draw Kuji on the burgers with the ketchup. That's pretty cool. I bet the customers would flip out if they knew a Ninja was making their burgers. The manager is a real a$$hole tho. He told me to stop throwing burgers around. I'm thinking of casting a Kuji on him tonight before bed. Let's see if he fucks with me then. I like to wear my tabi to work because they grip the greasy kitchen floor real well.

    I gotta get a shower and then meditate and go to bed. I work at 10 tommorrow. See ya later diary.


    Day 93

    Dear Diary,

    I got fired from work today for squirting secret sauce in a customer's eyes. He was being a total d1ck, telling me that he didnt want mayo and that there was mayo on it. I told him it was secret sauce. He just kept yelling so i flung the secret sauce at his face. He screamed like my sister did when i scared her and her boyfriend that night. It was flippin' awesome.

    Sensei said i could work for him, so that's cool. He has me come over every week and cut his grass and clean his house. Im not really cool with him making me do his laundry, tho, because he has a lot of skidmarks in his boxers. Its kinda gross. He also makes me clip his toenails, which im REALLY not crazy about doing, but that's the price you pay to learn the secrets of the Ninja.

    I'll write more later, Diary.


    Day 99

    Dear Diary,

    We got disqualified at the Open Classic because some elderly lady in the audience got hit by a shuriken. Hey...its not my fault. She should have came to class and learned shuriken dodging. The cops were talking about arresting us, but decided not to because the shuriken hit her oxygen tank, so she didn't really get injured. They couldn't have arrested us anyway. All we had to do was throw down our smoke bombs and teleport back to our van in the parking lot. When will these mortals learn that they can't take us?

    Oh well...another day done. Later, Diary.
  9. Shinkengata is offline

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Sep 2004
    Location
    Nor Cal
    Posts
    382

    Posted On:
    7/10/2006 4:32pm


     Style: BJJ,MT,Wrestling,Boxing

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Day 112


    Dear Diary,


    We went on some night mission exercises last night, which was totally badass. We crept through the woods and painted Kuji on Principal Lindermann's house and threw shurikens at his dog. We were gonna pee on his Volvo, but it's too hard to pull the Ninja gi pants down when you're in full uniform. It was a good mission, and the only downside of it is now me and D1abl0 both have poison ivy hella bad. My face was swollen with it and when some other guys at school asked me what happened today, i just told them i got into a fight with 9 gang members and got hit a few times. Sure, i might have been lying a little, but i guarantee you the guys at school won't mess with me now. haha!

    It sucks having poison ivy on your wang, though. Mine looks like a vienna sausage that was left in the microwave too long. God it itches hella bad. No internet porn for me tonight.

    Later Diary.
  10. kungfujew is offline
    kungfujew's Avatar

    Sexe dans la derrière!

    Join Date
    Aug 2005
    Location
    the left coast
    Posts
    726

    Posted On:
    7/10/2006 4:37pm

    supporting member
     Style: Muay Thai Khmer

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    More, for great justice!
    "Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit on his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin to slit throats." H.L. Mencken
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