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  1. TKD Black Belt is offline
    TKD Black Belt's Avatar

    Keeeeee-Yeah!

    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    In a van down by the river.
    Posts
    2,230

    Posted On:
    4/08/2006 11:58pm


     Style: Whoo-Hoo-Fu!

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!

    Signs it might be a McDojo!

    Well in light of the sheer number of threads dedicated to debunking exisiting McDojos I thought I would throw out a few of my top signs I've wandered into a McDojo. Feel free to add as you see fit. Maybe we can come up with a 'Potential Buyer's Guide Checklist' for schools:

    1.) The black belt teaching the class is 12 (or younger)!
    2.) There is little room left for equipment due to the massive number of trouphies, unused weapons and stupid little water fountains!
    3.) The instructor's sales pitch makes you last real estate agent look like a coma patient.
    4.) There are no certificates up on the wall indicating who the instructor is what what groups they are affiliated with.
    5.) Everyone is fat and out of shape.
    6.) The students are training off in a room that you can't and are not allowed to see!
    7.) No one acknowledges your existence when you walk in.
    8.) The first person you meet is President, founder, grand master, owner and motivational speaker.
    9.) You're asked to pay before you try a class.

    TKD

    'Dude, you got burnt by TKD. Ouch!'
  2. Askari is offline

    The Bottom Brick

    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Posts
    2,069

    Posted On:
    4/09/2006 8:29am


     Style: BJJ, Ju-Jitsu

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    A free month of training.

    Bring a friend and he too can get a free month with you, ask us about the "Buddy Program."

    Then during your supposed "Free Month" they hit you with the major sales pitch at least once a week to pay up.

    Two weeks after you pay up, they start talking about the Black Belt Club, where you get "extra" teaching.
    "Sifu, I"m niether - I'm a fire dragon so don't **** with me!"
  3. Goldust is offline

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Aug 2003
    Location
    Scottsdale,AZ
    Posts
    256

    Posted On:
    4/09/2006 7:33pm


     Style: Submission Grappling

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    ď9.) You're asked to pay before you try a class.Ē



    I donít agree with this one. Itís been my experience that when you give it away for nothing thatís what people think its worth. When I used to give people their first class for free what I got was a lot of clowns who think that itís their God given right to train for free, expect something for nothing, and often have little to no real interest in signing up but are only looking for someplace to roll for free for the day. In other words a complete waste of my time. When I started charging a mat fee I weeded out all of the dickheads and now only get people who are genuinely interested. I donít have contract, signup fees, etc. and everything is month to month so I donít think that charging a mat fee is unreasonable or necessarily indicative of a ďMcDojoĒ.
  4. Shard is offline

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Singapore
    Posts
    340

    Posted On:
    4/10/2006 4:02am


     Style: I know Kung Fu

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    1.You instructor has a Grandmasters Certificate. In Crayon.

    2.The Senior Assistant Instructor is a 4 year old black belt.

    3.The sign in the window says the school trains in more than 10 martial arts.

    4.It's a Korean art.

    5.Your instructor tries to sell you Amway products.

    6.While examining the schools tournament trophies, you find 3 for spelling bees.

    7.Reading the contract for the school is considered a kata (and a long one at that).

    8.No one sweats.

    9.While at a tournament, your opponent finds out who your teacher is and high-fives his teacher.

    10.When paying for your belt examinations, the instructor asks: "Do you want fries with that?"
  5. Askari is offline

    The Bottom Brick

    Join Date
    Apr 2005
    Posts
    2,069

    Posted On:
    4/10/2006 6:25am


     Style: BJJ, Ju-Jitsu

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    "Your instructor tries to sell you Amway products. "

    You may laugh now, but about this happened to me at a McDojo when I was a kid.
    "Sifu, I"m niether - I'm a fire dragon so don't **** with me!"
  6. DAYoung is offline
    DAYoung's Avatar

    Crouching Philosopher, Hidden Philosopher

    Join Date
    Mar 2006
    Location
    Melbourne, AUS
    Posts
    6,269

    Posted On:
    4/10/2006 6:34am

    supporting member
     Style: n/a (ex-Karate)

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    1. Your first gi has a black belt already sewn into it.
    2. Your seniors often say "Whoooooah" to one another when they spar.
    3. You can pay extra not to have to sit in seiza.
    4. Your sensei has a 'Weight Watchers' patch on the back of his gi.
    5. The dojo has its own call centre, staffed by the juniors.
    Martial Arts and Philosophy: Beating and Nothingness
    click here to order on Amazon

  7. konosan is offline

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Sep 2005
    Posts
    274

    Posted On:
    4/10/2006 7:21am


     Style: Japanese Jujutsu / aikido

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Can't forget the, ol' having to sing a contract deal.
  8. Rhamma is offline

    Not over zealous, but just zealous enough. 病気の粗悪品

    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    1,417

    Posted On:
    4/10/2006 9:05am


     Style: Okinawan Karate

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    People often tell me that I fail to see the gravity of the situation.
    I see the gravity, and I say...

    Step right up folks and watch me defy gravity!
  9. TKD Black Belt is offline
    TKD Black Belt's Avatar

    Keeeeee-Yeah!

    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    In a van down by the river.
    Posts
    2,230

    Posted On:
    4/10/2006 10:10am


     Style: Whoo-Hoo-Fu!

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    Quote Originally Posted by Shard

    9.While at a tournament, your opponent finds out who your teacher is and high-fives his teacher.
    I forgot about this one. In open tournaments this was like a buy into the next round. Depending on the fighter you may not even have to warm up (or you did and you added it to the HL Reel!)

    Also, although I agree nothing is truly free I always encourage people to jump on the mat and try it out. Maybe not a full blown class but at least a friendly roll. Teaching grappling is a little more 'friendly' than striking so a comfort factor has to be there for the student.

    A few more:

    1.) Two words: BOTTLE DRIVE
    2.) Pictures of Seagull
    3.) While looking at the trophies you realize not only did only one person win all of them but that person is no longer with the club.
    4.) You're given a time line on making your BB and it has your BB testing listed as next month.
    5.) They break flaming bricks


    TKD
  10. Teryan is offline

    Registered Member

    Join Date
    Jan 2004
    Posts
    317

    Posted On:
    4/10/2006 1:02pm


     Style: BJJ/ Judo/ MT

    --
    Hell yeah! Hell no!
    I rember the song TAE KWAN LEAP, but not the MA. What is your style TKD Black Belt?
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