Enforcer of Northeast Anti-Silliness Department Inc.
Posted On:2/13/2006 2:22pm
Style: Kaju, BJJ, Judo, Kempo
Kempo: "Kempo is a complete system. Ground fighting? You shouldn't be fighting on the ground if you're any good at Kempo"
Fear and bullets.
Posted On:2/13/2006 2:45pm
Judo: "You can use newaza in shiai..."
Translation: "If the guy isn't already tapping by the time you hit the ground you're gonna get stood up..."
Boxing: "he's really strong, but his footwork sucks!"
Translation: "he's already killed 4 men in the ring without having to move his feet."
And lo, Kano looked down upon the field and saw the multitudes. Amongst them were the disciples of Uesheba who were greatly vexed at his sayings. And Kano spake: "Do not be concerned with the mote in thy neighbor's eye, when verily thou hast a massive stick in thine ass".
--Scrolls of Bujutsu: Chapter 5 vs 10-14.
Posted On:2/13/2006 3:15pm
Lie#1: I haven't worked out in a while
Lie#2: Let's go easy
Lie#3: I'm sorry (when you score a clean ippon)
BJJ: Yeah I tapped because something fell in my eye...
Taichi: Fast punches lead to bad habits.
Sex: We always orgasm together.
Politics: Believe me, this is the truth.
Jazz: I'm cool with E flat major.
Bass: I'm ok with doing E flat major 12 bar walking base for 3 hrs while the horn players masturbate with their instruments
TV: Reality TV
Biology: All people were created equal.
Education: Children have innocent minds
Sexuology: Most deflorations have to do with penises attached to real people
Current stage of death: denial
Posted On:2/13/2006 3:27pm
Style: Jujutsu, freestyle Karate
"OUR karate includes all ranges, including groundfighting."
"Bear hug? Just pinch the skin behind their knee."
"Koryu kenjutsutsuka can kill any kendoka. It doesn't matter if they spar full contact."
"It doesn't matter if he gets the mount. Just poke his eyes."
"Once someone's on top, there's nothing you can do."
Posted On:2/13/2006 3:50pm
Ninjitsu: We aren't roleplaying.
Posted On:2/13/2006 3:54pm
Style: Bullshido's Ninja
Muay Thai: Clinch work IS grappling
and good morning to you too
Posted On:2/13/2006 4:01pm
"I'm sure the judges will be fair and impartial"
You can't make people smarter. You can expose them to information, but your responsibility stops there.
Your RBSD Cannot Save You Now.
Posted On:2/13/2006 4:23pm
Style: Spanish Rapier/Epee/Foil
Streetfighting: I don't need no martial arts trainin'!
Armchair Battler: Even I could take Tank Abbot!
Posted On:2/13/2006 4:39pm
Pressure Points work 100% of the time.
Grappling doesn't work on the streets.
Jump/Flying/Spinning kicks were created to kick people off of horses.
Posted On:2/13/2006 5:01pm
How to speak "promoter speak"
"The guy you're fighting has done some boxing"
Translation: He's a Golden Gloves Champion
"I think he wrestled in high school or something"
Translation: Olympic qualifier
"He does ok on the ground"
Translation: Brazillian Top Team
"He's got some decent Jiu Jitsu"
Translation: He trains at Chute Boxe
You're a scrapper, I like that."-Ronin69
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